The Way to Absolute Dungeon Administration – There Is No Reason To Meet With the Opponent!

Volume 01 A Prologue 2 – But, I Refuse

A flood of light bursts forth in a single room of the apartment.

The intensity of the light spills out through the window, overpowering even the sunlight and casting shadows around it. Yet, no one outside reacts to it…

“Alright, shall I go after him?”

(T/N: She assumed he hit him with the spell and transferred him to another world.)

With that, the beautiful woman who released the light vanishes from the room.

And in that room, only the sound of the game remains…

“Well then, shall we continue?”

I grip the controller and start the game again…

What, you think I’m falling into some cliché? What kind of nonsense is that? If someone points their hand at you, clearly about to do something, who in their right mind would just go along with it? Tell me if you know someone that naive.

The trick is simple. When I play games, I always position myself with the table between me and the TV. Modern wireless controllers are so convenient, aren’t they? Back in the day, cords limited how far you could sit.

Oh, right, back to the story. Let’s talk about the positioning when that beautiful woman (the trespasser) showed up. Initially, she was on the TV side of the table, and I was on the sofa side, with the table between us.

When I called 110 to report her, she came over to stop me, and I put even more distance between us.

At that moment, our positions flipped.

Then, when she shot that flash of light from her hand, I dove under the table to dodge it. That’s the moment the “under-the-table invincibility theory” was proven. Turns out, it’s effective for more than just earthquakes.

I calmly settle back in to enjoy my day off.

Some of you might wonder why I didn’t just run away. Think about it, though.

This person appeared out of nowhere in my locked apartment. Even if I escaped and they didn’t catch me right away, if they’re fixated on me specifically, there’s no way I could completely get away.

In other words, if she comes back, I’ll hear her out. If she gives up, I can go back to my normal life.

Call the police? Come on, if I said, “A woman suddenly appeared in my apartment!!” I’d either get sent to a hospital or labeled a creep.

I keep playing the game for a while. The clock strikes noon, and the wall clock starts its chime. I’m pretty proud of that clock, by the way.

“Time to eat… Should I cook or go out?”

It’s a tough call. During workdays, I stick to eating out (convenience stores count).

But it’s a day off, and I’m at home. I think in modern Japan, there aren’t many grown men who can’t cook. Honestly, even students can cook these days.

For the record, I’m not counting instant ramen that you just add hot water to and wait three minutes for as “cooking.”

When you live alone, factoring in ingredient costs and efficiency, cooking at home and eating out are about even.

Then I remember the clincher.

“Here, eat this, dear.”

The grandma next door had given me some homemade pickles.

Those pickles are a home run for me. The perfect balance of saltiness makes them great on their own, as a side with rice, in ochazuke, or even as a snack with drinks!!

But pickles alone won’t cut it. With pickles on the table, the rest of the meal practically decides itself.

“Miso soup, grilled salted salmon, tamagoyaki, and nori.”

Yes, a traditional Japanese spread. Natto’s for breakfast or dinner—that’s my rule.

The rice cooker’s ready to go, I’ve got miso soup, eggs, and nori on hand.

“Guess I’ll go buy some salmon.”

It’s super convenient that they sell single portions of salmon fillets these days.

So, I grab my wallet, phone, and keys and head out of the apartment.

…

“Tch, two fillets were way cheaper than one. I couldn’t help but buy them.”

Standing in front of my apartment with a bag of green onions and other garnishes, I glare at the plastic bag in frustration.

Yes, two salmon fillets were overwhelmingly cheaper than one.

It’s not uncommon for a deal like “buy two, get 10% off.” This time, it was 80% off.

Do I eat both fillets, or invite the grandma next door? I’m mulling it over as I step back into my apartment…

“No way, you actually dodged it…”

There, standing tall, is the beautiful trespasser.

So, basically, I can’t escape her, can I?

She points her hand at me again, just like before.

“This time, I won’t miss.”

Yeah, this time, I probably won’t be able to dodge the flash of light from her hand.

So…

“I’m about to eat, so move out of the way. Have you had lunch yet?”

“Huh? No, I haven’t eaten lunch yet.”

“Perfect. I bought extra since it was cheap. I’ll hear you out, so eat with me.”

With that, I head to the kitchen.

“Go on, sit on the sofa over there.”

“Oh, okay.”

She obediently sits on the sofa. When you act unpredictably, people tend to react slower or lose their ability to think clearly. Whether she’s human or not, I’ll set that aside for now.

After the meal…

“Thanks for the food. Did you make those pickles?”

“Nah, the grandma next door shared them with me. Pretty good, right?”

“They were delicious. But now I get it—that flavor comes from years of experience.”

“Yup. Here, have some tea.”

“Thanks.”

We sip our hot tea together… Alright, time to get to the point.

“So, I promised to hear you out.”

Sorry, but whether she’s a beautiful trespasser, a monster, or a god-sama, I’m not polite enough to use honorifics.

“Oh, right, that!! I totally forgot!!”

This girl’s hopeless.

“No need to go anywhere else to talk. I’ll listen right here.”

I make sure to set that boundary before she tries to hit me with another one of those teleporting flashes of light.

“Hmph, so you’ve finally given up. Fine, I’ll tell you.”

She’s got this total high-and-mighty attitude. As expected, beautiful women like her are no good.

Oblivious to my thoughts, she stands up, puts a hand on her hip, points at me, and declares:

“You’ve been chosen to go to another world, manage a dungeon, and maintain the balance of that world!!”

I don’t even flinch at her words. It’s pretty much what I expected. When non-humans like her talk without causing harm, it’s usually this kind of thing.

She continues.

“You can’t return to this world. But with just your body, you’ll bring order to that other world!!”

Yeah, I’m not letting that slide.

“Daga, KOTOWARU!!” (But, I REFUSE!)

Who’d give up their life for that?

“Whaaaaat!?”

Her shocked voice echoes. But come on, there’s nothing surprising about my response.