The Virgin Hero Who Fought in the Dungeon for 20 Years Returned to the Surface Only to Find the Population of the World Has Dropped Drastically, with a Male-to-Female Ratio of 1:1000 - 33

Chapter 33: Surprise Guest

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“Well, whatever. Haruka, you drink too. Still, how come there ain’t a single guy here when we’ve got three fine ladies gathered?”

“Ah. Like I said, we have a surprise guest today-“

“Kyouka, just ignore her.”

“It’s fine, it’s fine! Today, we’re celebrating the day Haruka got discharged from the hospital! And we’ve made a new dungeon streaming account without a hitch! Let’s drink all night long!”

“But I’m not lying about the surprise guest-“

“Oh. Someone’s at the door.”

“Haruka, did you order something from Amazon?”

“Or… Did you order something to accompany you when you feel lonely at night?”

“No! That’s not it! Huh?! Kyoka! You’ve already drunk that much?!”

“Alright! Allow me to check the new ‘tool’ Haruka ordered!”

“Tone it down, Kyouka. You’re disturbing the neighbors.”

“Then stop her, Rion!”

Before Haruka could intervene, Kyouka already dashed toward the front door despite her slightly tipsy state. That said, the distance from the door and the room where Haruka were drinking and eating with the others wasn’t that far. Meanwhile, Rion, with her cheeks slightly flushed, had a slovenly smile on her face as she popped open another chuhai. 

“Sorry to keep you waiting! I don’t have a stamp, so would a fingerprint be fine? Though in my case, it’s going to be a super-sized ‘BOING’ print! Ahaha-ha…?”

Assuming the delivery person was a young woman, Kyouka had lifted her knit sweater to reveal her boobs, only to freeze at the sight of the figure before her.

“Uh, ah, um. This is… Haruka Shimomura’s residence, right?”

There stood a young man dressed in a bright navy suit, holding a bouquet of roses while smiling shyly.

“Kyouka! What the hell are you doing!? Oh, Ryuuto-san! Welcome! I’m so sorry, this girl is a bit lacking in head. My room’s small and it’s kind of embarrassing to have a guest come to my humble place, but please, come on in.”

What is happening right now?

But before Kyouka could process what was happening right now, she already slammed the door shut with incredible force. Rion,who had been kneeling in front of the table, reacted as if she’d just spotted a monster. She sprang to her feet and swiftly grabbed Haruka by the collar, yanking her back and tossing Haruka behind her. 

“Kyuun!~”

“Umm… Is there something wrong?”

“N-No! Ohohohoho! Would you mind waiting just for a moment?”

Zukyun!~ The man’s voice pierced straight through her chest. Despite having already downed five 500ml cans of beer, Kyouka instantly sobered up. It was almost as if someone had dumped a bucket of ice water over her head. She locked eyes with Rion, then grabbed Haruka by the scruff of her neck and shoved her up against the wall.

“W-W-What the hell!? Who the hell is that young, handsome guy!? Is this him? Haruka, is he the ‘surprise guest’ you were talking about? Did you pull some strings we don’t know about and get us an i-i-illegal escort service!?”

Kyouka stammered on her words. Men were an extremely rare sight in this world. For a man like that to appear at a private, all-women, small-scale drinking party was practically unheard of. Given the circumstances, it was only natural for Rion and Kyouka to assume that the person they’d just seen was, in fact, a male escort.

“How much? How much do I have to pay? It’s cash, right? Cards and digital payments are no good, right? Sorry, it’s my first time, so I don’t really know how this works—”

Still in shock, Rion fumbled with her wallet, pulling out all the large bills in her wallet. It was only natural for young women to have their hidden lust exploding at the mere mention of a young man in front of them. 

“Calm down! Even if that man just now is actually a crossdresser, the quality of the crossdressing is crazy high! Maybe that person had undergone surgery?! That means he must be expensive! We need to think this through and figure out the most cost-effective way for the three of us to enjoy this—”

“Listen, I’ve been trying to tell you two! That person is Ryuuto Sakazaki! He’s the one who saved me in the dungeon! He’s a real man! And when I told him we were having a hot pot party, he actually went out of his way to come here!”

“Wait, so he’s really a guy?!”

“That’s what I’m saying!”

“Ryuuto isn’t just your imaginary boyfriend, Haruka?”

“He is not!!”

“Wait, hold up. That means… Oh, hell no. His first impression of me is the absolute worst!!”

Kyouka’s knees gave out, causing her to almost collapse on the spot. What kind of guy would have a good impression of a woman who, on their first meeting, practically flashed him? Whether Kyouka was wearing her bra or not was irrelevant here. The answer was obvious. No one. No one would think highly of anyone who flashed them. 

“If I knew there was gonna be a guy here, I would’ve worn something better! 

Haruka, you set me up! I mean, I wanna get laid, but not like this!”

“What are you even saying? Are you stupid? No, no, wait a sec. Kyoka, you’re still better off than me! Look at this! I’m wearing my old middle school jersey!”

Rion exclaimed while pointing at the maroon-colored, utterly lame, potato-sack-style jersey with “Saitama No. 5 Middle School” printed on it. The fabric was stretched out and the color had faded, making her look absolutely pitiful. Rion  tugged at the hem of her jersey, practically on the verge of tears.

Out of all possible outfits, she had managed to pick the absolute worst one.

“Oh, come on, it’s fine. Ryuuto-san isn’t the type to get worked up over small stuff.”

Haruka smiled while resting her cheek against her palm. However, Kyouka wasn’t foolish enough to miss the hidden intent behind that smile.

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