Chapter 73: Avoiding Greetings

The rampaging girl had been out of control, but the moment Ryu-san appeared, she calmed down instantly. I still can’t quite figure out the board game club’s relationships, but perhaps their bonds are stronger than the curse?

It seems there’s a rule that those affected by the curse don’t get into major fights. Maybe that’s why? Even so, those guys still argue verbally instead of resorting to violence…

“Man, sorry about everything, Saka-chan.”

I expected him to start lecturing me, but instead he casually handed me a melon soda. He took an unusually long time to come back—did he really search high and low for it? I should have just ordered some tea or coffee.

“No, it’s fine… I was just a bit worried since you took so long, but I’m glad you’re safe.”

“Worried…? Were you concerned about me?”

“Of course I was. There are vending machines everywhere, you know.”

Sorry, I lied. I was too caught up in that glasses-wearing girl’s wild outburst to even think about Ryu-san. I only saw him as the designated backup to clean up the mess.

“E-hehe… You really care about me, huh…”

Normally, her blushing and fidgeting would be adorable, but given the situation—and her soaked clothes—I can’t muster any cute feelings. Let’s just get out of here already.

“President, I’m really sorry…”

Yeah, apologize to me too. No, scratch that—don’t apologize at all. Never apologize again.

“Ah, don’t worry about it.”

He half-forced an arm around her shoulder, offering some words of comfort. Gotta say, it’s impressive—despite being drenched and reeking, he doesn’t seem to mind at all. Even with his neurotic streak, he sure has a big heart for his subordinates.

“For now, shouldn’t we get out? There are more people gathering.”

“Hey, isn’t his mental care more important?”

No, getting out of here is the top priority. In fact, changing clothes comes before any mental health talk. I don’t know why you’re giving me that cold-hearted look, but let’s just leave already.

“Um, I brought a knife, so as an apology…”

Yeah, you’d better not mention that. I’m no expert on the fine points of the Swords and Firearms Control Law, but that thing’s probably illegal. Its blade is clearly too long.

“Stop it already. You’ll be off sausages for a while.”

“Then I’ll just stick it into the back of my hand—”

“I SAID, DON’T SELF-HARM!”

Why is she so stubborn? Her enthusiasm for self-injury is off the charts. It’s not about showing sincerity anymore—she’s being controlled by her self-harming tendencies.

“But I… I stalked President and Sakamoto-san on their date—the worst thing imaginable!”

I had a feeling it wasn’t just a coincidence. Seriously, how do yanderes have such insane information-gathering skills? I haven’t told anyone about this, though.

“You’re so strict. If you’re going to self-harm, stick to gambling.”

I’m pretty sure gambling isn’t a free pass for self-injury either, but anyway.

“Ah, everyone. Could I have a moment?”

…Ah, great. The police are here. I told you we should have left sooner. Well, we’ll have to deal with questioning now, but can we at least change clothes first? My shoes and socks are soaked, and I really need to wash my feet with soap.

“I find it hard to believe, but… a high school girl defecated in the fountain—oh, you’re…”

Oh, it’s him. That guy… the officer from before. The one who showed up when I was literally using the multi-purpose restroom for multiple purposes.

“…Take it easy. Alright, I’m off now… go take a shower or something.”

…I’m feeling all mixed up—happy yet sad. I’m glad we dodged a police scandal, but it’s rough being seen as someone you shouldn’t get involved with. Not being interrogated in a situation like this is pretty exceptional, isn’t it? Well, sure—it makes sense if the Hijiri family is backing you up, but that’s not all there is to it, right? I’m being avoided too, aren’t I?

Of course, that’s expected, but the onlookers are in an uproar. Whether they think I’m Yak-san’s son or some nutcase who’s constantly in trouble with the police, it’s all just infuriating.

“S-sakka-chan… You’re unbelievable! I mean, sending the cops packing like that—you’re not normal!”

“No, it’s not me—it’s you lot who aren’t normal. You’re only avoided because you fraternize with lunatics. Sure, I’ve probably been tagged as abnormal too, but I hope, deep down, you realize I’m the victim here. I really hope so.”

“Just as I expected! You’re insanely deranged!”

“You’re mistaken… I’m normal… at least I’m normal enough to stop a woman from drowning herself…”

“I see… turning the president into a bitch like this…”

“No, that’s not it… that person was always a bitch… I’m not involved in any of that!”

“You’re the best boyfriend… I actually ended up getting hitched to such a fine guy… I’m so lucky!”

“Has it really gotten that far already? Damn it—thanks to that glasses-wearing kid, I’ve ended up with both a sullied reputation and a terrible smell. What am I supposed to do now…?”

“S-so, why don’t we change clothes for now? My feet are soaking, and you’ve got hardly any dry parts left.”

“I’ve been wondering for a while—aren’t you disgusted? Aren’t you embarrassed to have your own excrement seen by others? Aren’t you ashamed of spreading your stench? At the very least, when you’re chanting those sutras, don’t you already have enough to fear?”

“Alright, alright! That’s it! I can’t have my precious club member and boyfriend catching a cold, can I? Besides, I’ve made up my mind!”

“…Huh?”

“Come to my place right now! Consider it a greeting, too!”

“I don’t want to… Going on a date with a woman is dangerous enough, and inviting me into your home to meet your parents is just too risky. Besides, you wouldn’t like it either—introducing a man covered in shit and piss, would you?”

“Don’t worry. My dad isn’t around right now, so I’ll just be greeting my mom.”

“…Greeting the old man is dangerous, isn’t it? If you’ve already greeted your old lady, eventually you’ll have to meet your old man too, right? I really hate that kind of hassle—can I just bail now?”

“I want you to greet them, then naturally end up staying over, and from there work out the wedding arrangements… uhehehe…”

She’s completely lost in her own world, planning way ahead. Her scheme to cover all her bases is laid out in painstaking, high-resolution detail.

…Alright, I guess there’s no choice.

“Ryu-san!”
“Now, about finalizing the betrothal arrangements… Huh? What’s wrong, Saka-chan? You didn’t bring a gift or anything…”
“My place! Won’t you come to my place!? My parents aren’t here, so how about it!”
“…S-so, does that mean… that… it’s really happening?”
“…Yes! It is exactly that!”
“Oh my gosh… we’re really climbing the adult staircase…”

Alright, for now I’ve managed to dodge the greeting. All that’s left is avoiding Kaede and the others, but frankly, I have no plan. But what can I do? If I don’t get through this phase, the next one won’t even come into existence.

Well, it’ll probably be fine. After all, these two are under the curse, right? People affected by the curse tend to warm up to each other. They even accept Shiro, who has nothing to do with the curse. In any case, these yanderes—despite their over-the-top sutra chanting and eccentricities—have probably only suffered the kind of irrational violence you’d expect from some yakuza.

Speaking of which, what’s happened with that yakuza office? I don’t know which faction they’re from, but won’t they eventually retaliate? And besides, during that stampede, Kaede mentioned my name, didn’t she? What if I get kidnapped…? I suppose some mysterious savior with a keen sense of smell will show up before things get out of hand, but still—fear is fear.

That makes lifting the curse another problem altogether. After all, in their uncursed state, those guys wouldn’t stand a chance against the yakuza, would they? I know it sounds weird to say that being a yandere gives you an edge, but…

Anyway, I’ll forget about that for now. This problem has to be solved first.

“Y-You’re gonna put on a condom, right? You got one? I mean… are we really going to do that now? It’s still a bit too soon… I mean…”

At this rate, even if I run into Kaede and the others, maybe it won’t be so bad? They might judge me harmless and just ignore me entirely… No, I better not get my hopes up. I really hope I don’t bump into them…