Chapter 18 – I Only Accepted an Assistant Because My Sourdough Was About to Over-Proof!

The cracked marble floor vibrated with chaotic magical energy. Dust swirled thickly through the warm morning air. A destroyed alien robot smoked in the dusty background. The massive machine was embedded in the ancient stone wall. Four insane magical students surrounded me.

“I will eradicate this annoying blue-haired bug for you.”

Sakura struggled wildly against my tight physical grip. Her bright red hair floated menacingly in the cold magical air.

“Please drop the solid silver knife right now.”

I pulled her narrow waist flush against my chest.

“She pointed a massive lethal weapon at your beautiful chest. I do not care about pathetic school rules.”

Sakura dug her expensive shoes stubbornly into the loose dirt. She gripped the silver handle of the deadly knife tight.

“It was a formally sanctioned academy duel.”

“I lost everything today. I just wanted to prove I was the strongest.”

Elara wiped a fresh tear from her dirty face. She scrambled backward away from the terrifying yandere aura.

“Your pathetic sci-fi dreams are meaningless.”

Sakura smiled a victorious, unhinged smile.

“The dark master requires a loyal shadow servant. Enslaving a defeated foe is the ultimate dark lord move.”

Dantalion floated two inches above the arena ground. Black smoke poured thickly from his heavy leather boots.

“I do not want a servant today. I am just a baker in a cheap cotton shirt.”

“A golden king must safely guide the broken warrior. You misunderstand his noble, golden intentions.”

Leo stepped directly next to the edgy dark lord. He pointed his glowing silver replica sword at the demon.

“I am not a golden king.”

“He is obviously a terrifying monster of pure darkness.”

Dantalion sneered and revealed his perfectly white teeth.

My muscles burned from the severe physical effort. Kneading heavy bread dough built my raw physical strength. Holding back a yandere princess tested that strength.

“Let me go so I can bury her in the dirt.”

Sakura twirled the sharp silver blade effortlessly between her fingers.

“We are not burying anyone in the academy dirt.”

I squeezed her waist tighter to pin her arms.

“You are way too kind for this dirty world.”

She leaned her soft head backward against my tired shoulder.

I pulled my left wrist up toward my face. I stared at the small black numbers on my digital watch. The cheap screen flashed glaringly in the bright morning sunlight. It was ten fifteen in the morning.

My heart slammed violently against my ribs. Pure panic washed over my body. My artisan sourdough starter rested alone in the luxury penthouse. Doughy needed to be folded fifteen minutes ago. The delicate gluten structure was collapsing right now. Over-proofed bread dough turns into a sad, sour puddle. I needed to sprint to the stainless steel kitchen immediately.

“Fine! You are my official academic assistant now. Let’s go!”

My voice echoed loudly across the silent combat arena. Everyone stopped moving and stared at my average face. I pointed my bare right hand at the crying mechanic.

A collective gasp sucked the air from the stadium. Thousands of elite students leaned forward in the high stone bleachers. They glared down at the dusty combat pit in shock.

“Look at his arrogant and bossy tone! He treats the strict S-Rank hierarchy like his personal toy!”

A rich noble student screamed from the top row. I ignored the toxic crowd.

“I am in a massive hurry right now.”

Elara blinked her tear-filled blue eyes in genuine shock. She scrambled up quickly from the dirty arena floor.

“You actually want me to be your personal assistant?”

“I just said that out loud. Just follow me back to the golden luxury dorm.”

She stood perfectly straight and snapped a crisp military salute.

“I swear loyalty to the terrifying monster who spared me. I will carry your heavy bags and write your essays.”

She wiped the remaining engine grease from her bruised face.

“I am just a normal guy who bakes bread.”

I rubbed my tired eyes with my flour-stained knuckles.

Professor Arthur laid flat on his back in the dusty dirt. He raised a lazy right hand and gave a weak thumbs-up.

“Good job exploiting the obscure academic loophole today, kid. Enjoy doing zero boring school paperwork this semester. Wake me up when the lunch bell rings.”

He pulled his dirty gray trench coat over his face. A soft snore immediately followed his lazy command.

Sakura let out a terrifying, deep yandere growl. She gripped the solid silver throwing knife tight again.

“I am going to poison her first meal.”

“You are not poisoning my new homework robot.”

I grabbed her pale left hand firmly with my calloused right hand.

“You are touching me voluntarily.”

Her bright crimson eyes widened in romantic shock.

“I am keeping you from throwing lethal weapons. Walk faster before my delicate dough dies.”

She smiled a beautifully sweet, unhinged smile.

“Your warm touch is the ultimate reward for my deep devotion.”

I dragged my crazy childhood friend toward the massive iron gates. Elara scrambled quickly across the cracked marble to follow our fast pace.

The ancient magical academy campus felt suffocating today. Bright morning sunlight poured over the pristine cobblestone paths. Hundreds of elite magical students crowded the wide stone walkways between classes.

“The dark faction officially claims its first victim.”

Dantalion yelled the edgy statement from the ruined arena entrance.

“We are not a weird dark faction.”

I did not even bother turning my head around to look at him.

“The golden king proudly leads his loyal shadows toward the light!”

Leo shouted his delusional heroic catchphrase into the warm air.

“I am just trying to get back to my kitchen.”

We marched rapidly down the main academy thoroughfare. The massive crowd of elite students saw us rapidly approaching them. The lively atmosphere of the campus vanished. They froze mid-step on the ancient cobblestones.

“Do not make direct eye contact with the terrifying SSS gods.”

A senior elite student whispered the frantic warning loudly. The large crowd parted violently like the Red Sea. They scrambled desperately onto the immaculate green campus lawns.

“They are terrified of your raw physical power.”

Sakura squeezed my trapped hand with unyielding strength.

“They are just acting like dramatic, annoying weirdos.”

I pulled her much faster down the cleared stone path. Elara jogged closely behind us to keep up the frantic pace. She treated the simple walk like a dangerous black op.

“I will fiercely guard your rear flank from unseen enemy attacks.”

“There are no enemies standing on the school sidewalk.”

A girl with long elf ears hid fearfully behind a thick textbook.

“The cruel baker boy enslaved the fallen mechanic.”

I let out a long, exhausted sigh.

“Everyone here desperately needs a serious reality check.”

Sakura leaned her head gently against my right shoulder.

“They perfectly recognize your authority over this pathetic school.”

“I just want authority over a functional baking oven.”

We finally reached the highest peak of the academy campus. The massive magical clock tower loomed over the entire area. The Rank SSS dormitory building stood over the green valley. The towering building looked like a solid gold wedding cake.

“We finally made it back to the ridiculous golden palace.”

We crossed the water moat in tense silence. The solid platinum doors opened automatically with a soft magical hum. The grand foyer gleamed brightly with polished gold and pristine white marble. My cheap canvas shoes sank deeply into the impossibly soft carpet.

“This place is massive and excessive.”

Elara stared blankly at the lavish SSS-Rank entrance.

“Just take off your dirty combat boots right now.”

I dropped my cheap canvas backpack onto the clean floor. I sprinted frantically toward the solid golden door of my private suite.

“I will secure the outer perimeter from hostile intruders.”

Elara took a wide, defensive stance in the velvet hallway.

“Just come inside the living room.”

I pushed the heavy golden door open with a loud click. We stepped directly onto the expensive white tiger skin rug.

“Is that a giant indoor waterfall? The monthly water bill must be astronomical.”

Elara pointed a shaking finger at the far marble wall. She followed me closely into the massive professional kitchen area.

“I ignore the rushing water at this point. Nobody is the supreme commander of this stainless steel kitchen.”

I ran straight past the plush velvet living room furniture. I slid across the polished marble floor directly to the metal counter.

“Do not touch a single thing inside this perfect culinary sanctuary.”

Sakura marched into the kitchen directly behind the confused mechanic.

“I will follow all direct orders from the supreme commander.”

Elara snapped another crisp, dramatic military salute.

A large glass bowl sat innocently under a clean damp cloth. My bare hands shook with baking anxiety. I grabbed the soft edge of the damp white cloth.

“Please tell me you survived the extra fifteen minutes.”

I pulled the wet cloth away from the heavy glass bowl. The artisan sourdough starter bubbled softly inside the clear container. It was dangerously close to the top edge of the glass.

“It is slightly over-proofed but still structurally viable.”

I let out a massive breath of warm, relieved air.

“Is that just a giant bowl of sticky wet flour?”

Elara leaned over the shiny metal counter to look closer.

“It is a delicate and beautiful living organism.”

I grabbed a cheap plastic scraper to fold the wet dough.

“I will chop your curious, dirty nose off.”

Sakura pulled a sharp silver knife rapidly from her uniform pocket.

“I am stepping back to a safe distance right now.”

Elara took three fast steps backward away from the steel counter.

“Please put the lethal throwing weapons away. Baking is a deeply peaceful and rewarding scientific process.”

I pushed my calloused hands deep into the sticky dough. I stretched the heavy gluten structure with a firm push.

“I must fiercely protect your culinary focus from dirty bugs.”

Sakura twirled the silver blade with terrifying, smooth athletic grace.

“I can calibrate the industrial oven temperature for you.”

Elara pulled a highly advanced digital tool slowly from her dirty pocket.

“I know how to turn the standard oven dial myself.”

“I just want to be a useful and productive academic assistant.”

She looked deeply sad and desperate for a specific daily task.

“You can wash the dirty mixing bowls in the massive sink.”

“I will execute the dishwashing protocol with absolute perfection.”

She marched quickly toward the massive stainless steel kitchen sink. I finally folded the dough perfectly as the two crazy girls watched my every move.