I Came Back from the Dead, Quit Being a Holy Hero, and Just Wanna Shake My Hips in a Harem - Chapter 31: Fate, It’s Like Gravity!

Chapter 31: Fate, It’s Like Gravity!

The sacred city of Kamunkotan lay hidden deep within a great bamboo forest.

From the trade city of Granule, we took a river ferry south, then passed through the Fighters’ Canal before following the coastline.

All in all, it turned into a days-long voyage by ship—so of course, we packed plenty of supplies for a long adventure.

“…They say just crossing one mountain is enough to feel a different culture, but this really does feel like another world.”

I strolled down Kamunkotan’s boardwalk alone, taking in the sights.

The town was full of wooden houses.

Wind chimes tinkled in the breeze, colorful ornaments swayed from eaves, and the place barely used any magic-tech at all—it felt half-merged with nature itself.

The people wore hemp clothes and kimono-like outfits, giving the whole area a vibe totally different from Granule.

“I think it all started with the shrine maidens who fled here, huh.”

Yeah—the story went that shrine maidens driven out of an eastern island nation had taken refuge in this bamboo forest.

Because of that, the town’s steeped in eastern culture.

Plenty of folks from the east gathered here too, turning it into practically another world altogether.

…Though, of course, that wasn’t the only reason for the unique scenery.

I wandered along the street, checking out the stalls lined up one after another.

“Fans for the dancing priestesses—perfect for the ritual dances! Want to dress up, young lady?”

“Shrine-maiden manju, passed down through the generations! The one and only, the real deal, right here!”

“Hokkoro dolls! Cute, cuddly, everyone loves them—get your Hokkoro dolls here!”

Since this was a tourist spot, keeping up the scenery was a must.

The main attractions were, of course, the great bamboo forest—and the dancing shrine maidens.

In Kamunkotan, aside from the legendary Dancing Maiden, there were also more approachable “shrine maidens” you could see around town.

Sure enough, a few young girls in shrine maiden outfits were strolling along the boardwalk.

These were the Kamunkotan shrine maidens.

Under the supposed “guidance of the spirits” (translation: pay them money), they danced to “illuminate the world” (translation: entertain you), and offered healing performances for weary travelers (translation: usually only at high-class inns).

And no, before you ask—there were zero erotic elements. None at all.

…Tragic, I know. And no, there weren’t any secret brothels either.

Still, you got to experience eastern culture, watch lovely young maidens dance up close, and even try out a “shrine maiden dance experience course.”

As a tourist spot, it was easy to see why it was so popular.

And with the Demon King Chronova gone, business had only boomed further.

And then—

“—Hokkorooooo.”

A palm-sized blue spirit drifted lazily past me.

It wore a wooden mask, and I noticed dozens more like it floating around town—each mask carved with its own unique design.

This was Kamunkotan’s other famous attraction: the Hokkoros, guardian spirits.

The town’s faith in spirits basically revolved around them.

Long ago, when the shrine maidens fled to the bamboo forest, they built the town together with the Hokkoros.

Neighbors, friends, silent watchers—

That was their role here.

[Come meet the shy little spirits!]

That was the slogan, and yeah—it made them a hit.

They even sold “Hokkoro Spirit Rice Crackers.”

If you gave one to a Hokkolo, they’d get ridiculously happy.

But—warning signs around town made it clear:

If you just pretended to give one and then didn’t, they’d remember your face… and prank you within an inch of your life.

So yeah, don’t mess with them.

…Anyway, I wasn’t interested in Hokkoros.

My eyes were only for the shrine maidens.

Flowers? Forget ‘em. Dumplings? Nah. Girls? YES‼‼‼

As for the rumors of Demon King Chronova moving in the shadows—

“So, the ‘leader of the Hokkoro spirits’ just feels that way?”

I asked Lily that on the river ferry while we cruised down the great river.

“Apparently, it’s a presence similar to when the Demon King was alive.”

“…And that’s enough for a ‘maybe he’s secretly plotting something’? That’s some world-class paranoia.”

“I do think it’s most likely just a high-class monster. But these are unstable times. You can’t be too cautious. That’s why they decided to hold the Divine Descent Rite.”

The Divine Descent Rite.

Not the shrine maidens.

This was the real deal—a ritual to call down a true Dancing Maiden, one who could commune directly with spirits.

Still, that had nothing to do with us directly.

The investigation was just to confirm whether there really was dark activity—most likely a high-level monster lurking, not the Demon King herself.

So I volunteered to do the investigation alone.

Lily seemed pretty puzzled by that.

“A solo investigation?”

“Yeah! It’ll be way more efficient if we split up!”

“…You’re strangely motivated… and strangely not.”

“That’s because my inner goodness just awakened! Bam—suddenly, I’m bursting with virtue!”

Lily and Filio exchanged a look, then said suspiciously:

“Church charity work.”

“The red-envelope quest you kept dodging.”

“B-Bring it on! I told you, I suddenly awakened to goodness, didn’t I?!”

By promising that, I somehow got permission for a solo investigation.

Fwhahaha! As if I’d suddenly awaken to goodness!

If fate insists on stalking me, then I’ll just factor that in and control the flow!

Even if fate tries to mess with the Divine Descent Rite, all I have to do is move on a smaller scale—easy.

For example…

“Funyaah—”

Not far ahead, a shrine maiden tripped and fell. I couldn’t see her face.

She had this loose, airy vibe, and was sitting on the ground rubbing her leg in pain.

As a former Hero—and as a man—I should help her.

And hey, if I got lucky, maybe this would lead to some casual, irresponsible sex in a foreign land.

“Owww… Falling in a place with nothing to trip on… life sure is mysterious.”

But nope! I won’t help her.

Even if she looks like a total beauty!

Especially if she might be connected to Kikino!

As the Hero—or rather, as a man destined for a harem—I’ve decided: events that smell like heroine introductions are to be completely ignored!

And that girl? She’s already giving off suspiciously airheaded character vibes. Totally dangerous.

So, I left her where she was and focused on the investigation.

“Noticed anything unusual lately?”

I asked the lady selling Hokkoro rice crackers.

“I’m investigating the town. Anything at all—little details are fine.”

“Well… I guess the Hokkoro spirits have been acting off.”

“…Off?”

“Usually, the moment the crackers are baked, they swarm in. But lately, nothing. Maybe they got sick of the flavor?”

So the rumor about the Hokkoro leader sensing something strange… maybe the whole race was on edge.

Yeah, better keep in mind that the spirits are “not feeling well.”

While I was mulling that over, a flustered voice piped up behind me.

“Huh? You don’t have money?”

“…Looks like my wallet ran off somewhere~”

“You dropped it again? Seriously? Don’t tell me you’re doing this on purpose.”

It was that shrine maiden who tripped earlier.

She’d just finished having her treats wrapped up and only then realized her wallet was missing.

Now she stood there in front of the manju stall, shoulders drooping.

I couldn’t see her face, but man… the aura of “I’m in serious trouble here” was practically radiating.

“Sigh… that girl really needs to get it together.”

The rice cracker lady gave me a knowing look.

Oi, oi, oi—don’t drop suspiciously foreshadow-y lines like that!

“Oh my? Are you interested in her?”

“Nope. Not at all. I have zero interest in shrine maidens. None.”

“Shrine maidens are part of this town’s traditional culture, you know?”

Ughhh… it had to be her.

Felt like it was her.

No, she didn’t have Kikino’s otherworldly aura, but still…

I could practically hear Fate whispering in my ear: “C’mon, help her out~. Who knows, maybe you’ll get lucky with a shrine maiden~.”

“Fueee… I’m soooorry…”

And that’s exactly why I won’t help her! Because I can feel the fate flag radiating off her!!

I left the flustered shrine maiden behind and headed off to continue my investigation.

Sure, people might think I’m heartless for not helping a girl in need.

But listen here! A man aiming for irresponsible harem sex has no use for compassion!

Fwhahahahaha! I am Haruya Arden—the villainous scoundrel who will (probably, almost certainly) soak countless maidens’ loins in the near future!

And yet—

No matter how much I tried to ignore her, I kept running into her around town.

“Unyaaah~ A sudden gust of wind blew this bag over my face—can’t seeee!”

I won’t help her.

“Ueeeh, my shoelaces snapped… Haha, today just keeps getting worse~”

Still I won’t help her. Not a chance.

“Oh nooo, grandma looks like she’s struggling. I’ll carry her—gahhh, heavyyyy…”

N-No! I’m not helping!! I swear I won’t!!

“What’s wrong, little boy? Lost your way? Yeah, this town’s pretty confusing~ Don’t worry, leave it to big sis. I totally know this area like the back of my—umm, wait… where are we again?”

Come on now, aren’t you supposed to be a local? Get it together, will you?!

Even for an evil scoundrel like me, ignoring her completely was starting to prick at my conscience!

So I just flagged down a guard, told him about her, and quickly slipped away before she could rope me in again.

Haaah… Okay. I’ve put some real distance between us now. No way we’ll bump into each other anymore.

Feeling a little peckish, I grabbed some fried noodles from a food stall (they even lent me a fork instead of chopsticks—clearly aimed at tourists).

I walked a bit, then sat under a big tree with a nice view.

Fork in hand, I poked at the noodles in their paper tray while gazing out at the townscape.

I was exhausted… especially since she gave off that “can’t leave her alone” aura. That made it worse.

I twirled up some noodles with the fork and took a bite.

The flavor was rich and strong—just the way I liked it.

But somehow, I couldn’t really throw myself into eating.

Sigh… If I were here just for sightseeing, this would be such a fun town.

Once all this is over, maybe I could hang out with a shrine maiden or two.

Try out some exotic, “foreign-style” fun.

Letting my guard down with thoughts like that—that’s where I screwed up.

Because then I heard a soft, airy voice right above me:

“Heyyy, mister, help meee~ I can’t get down from hereee~”

Dear Fate,

Could we maybe try giving each other some space?

Take a step back, reflect on ourselves, and find a healthier distance?

Right now, you seem so obsessed with me you can’t see anything else.

I think we both need time and room to breathe.

Please give this matter your thoughtful consideration.

Respectfully yours.