#47: The Cornered Club President Finally Stands

The next day, in the classroom, I went through the motions with Fujiko-san as usual while eating lunch together, but I still hadn’t reached a conclusion in my mind.

Well, Fujiko-san hadn’t directly confessed to me yet, and I had no intention of making a move like I did before.
The real question was: what would I do if she confessed? Normally, that’d be some self-important virgin nonsense, but I’m a harem protagonist. I need to mentally prepare myself now so I don’t embarrass myself if a confession actually comes.

So, that afternoon after school.

Surprisingly, Kurumi told me to “come straight home,” giving me the classic I’m lonely, big bro, come home early call, so I brought Meg and Sakura-san with me.

When we got there, I noticed there was a woman’s shoe in the entryway besides Kurumi’s.

“That’s unusual. Did Kurumi bring a friend over?”

“Huh? Those shoes…”

As we exchanged those words and went inside, Kurumi came out of her room.

“I told you to come home, but why’d you bring Meg-chan and the senpai too?”

“Today’s a no-club day. Instead of a date with Sakura-san, I invited her over to the house. Anyway, did you bring a friend or something?”

“Oh, Fujiko-senpai from yesterday’s conversation came over.”

“Huh? Why?”

Right on cue, Fujiko-san emerged from Kurumi’s room, fidgeting.

“Excuse me for intruding…”

“Welcome~! Since everyone’s here anyway, let’s all eat together!”

Meg had started doing her usual carefree thing without asking.

I was mulling it over—What’s she doing here? and Did Kurumi decide to push Fujiko-san forward?—when Meg took charge.

“Norio! What’re we making for dinner today?”

So Sakura-san and I ended up making curry.

The Mizumoto family curry has daikon radish in it.
It’s unusual as a curry ingredient, but when daikon goes into curry, it becomes incredibly juicy and delicious. I’d recommend it to anyone who likes daikon in oden.

Sakura-san cut the ingredients while I cooked.
Once the simmering started, Sakura-san began cutting vegetables for salad, and I started making dressing.

While the two of us stood in the kitchen cooking, the other three sat at the table sipping tea and chatting.

“Fujiko-chan, did you come today to see Norio?”

“Um, well…”

“Yeah. Fujiko-senpai asked if she could come since she wanted to see the geezer.”

“W-wait, Kurumi-chan! Don’t tell him!”

“Haha, there’s no point hiding it now—it’s obvious! But Fujiko-chan, you used to dodge Norio so smoothly before, and now it’s the opposite! Your change is seriously incredible—I’m dying!”

“N-no, I mean, that’s not… I didn’t mean to…”

Pressed aggressively by the relentless Meg, and with Fujiko-san’s response wavering, Sakura-san suddenly cut in with a sharp edge to her tone.

“Tsukino-san, why don’t you just be honest about it already? I was in your position before, but I didn’t go around waffling like this. What are you so afraid of? If you throw your true feelings at Norio, I’m sure he’ll respond to them.”

Sakura-san then embraced me and gave me a light kiss on the lips.

“See? Isn’t this enviable? This is Norio Mizumoto for you. Norio is incredibly kind and sweet to us heroines. If you want to become one of Norio’s heroines, you can’t use sneaky tricks or just wait around. You have to throw your true feelings out there and bare everything.”

“That’s right~! Even Kyouko-chan, teacher or not, bared everything! Though she bared it so much that we all kind of recoiled!”

“That whole Love Comedy Syndrome nonsense was probably just sophistry to hide your true feelings, right? The truth is you were curious about Norio, wanted to know more about him, but you couldn’t come to terms with your own feelings, so you made up this ridiculous Love Comedy Syndrome excuse to justify it, didn’t you?”

At Sakura-san’s observation, Fujiko-san didn’t try to refute anything. She just went silent and looked down.

I see.
As expected of Sakura-san.
She’s still sharp as ever.

Sakura-san’s assessment was probably mostly on the mark.

“Wait a second, Meg-chan. You said even the teacher bared everything—are you talking about Kyouko-sensei? Does the teacher like the geezer too?”

“Ah…”
“Ah…”
“Ah…”

Damn Meg. She got carried away and said something unnecessary, so now Kurumi found out that Kyouko-chan was also one of my harem heroines, which I’d been keeping under wraps.

“So~ the geezer’s already juggling three girls. And Fujiko-senpai, you’re cool with this? You’re gonna make it four?”

Meg and Sakura-san, who’d been on the offensive just moments ago, suddenly lost momentum, while Kurumi, who’d been quiet until now, suddenly gained energy.

I kept quietly stirring the simmering curry pot.
Honestly, I wanted to know what Fujiko-san’s true feelings were, just like Sakura-san had said.

The atmosphere grew heavy, replacing what had been there before. Only the sound of the curry simmering and its appetizing aroma filled the space.

As I watched Fujiko-san alone, she stood up while still looking down.

“I am…”

#48: Coming Out and Confession

Fujiko-san stood up and began speaking as if spilling out her words.

“I am…”

Our eyes met as she looked up.

“It was love at first sight…”

“Whaaaaaaaaat!?!?!”

Wait, you’re overreacting too much!
I’m the protagonist, so getting love-at-first-sight is normal, right?

“It was back in first year. We were in different classes last year, but one time I happened to see you stumbling over the step at the shoe lockers and almost falling—that ‘whoa’ moment—and…”

“You saw me?”

“At that moment, it felt like I was struck by lightning! Like ‘A wild Johnny-san has appeared!'”

“Johnny-san…?”

“Oh! That Sideburn-type strongest Pocket Ojisan that Kurumi mentioned yesterday!?!?”

“Yes! That’s it! Norio-kun is the strongest Sideburn-type for me!!!”

Oh, that’s definitely not a normal love-at-first-sight.

“I don’t have that long of sideburns, do I? I don’t think so. Right, Sakura-san?”

“Um… well, the sideburns aren’t that long, but if someone calls you an ‘old man,’ I’ll admit… I kinda chuckle.”

“W-wait a minute, Fujiko-senpai! So you’re saying you fell in love at first sight because I look like Johnny-san? Does that mean you never gave up on that real Pocket Ojisan hunt you mentioned in middle school?”

“Yep! Of course not, Kurumi-chan! Why would I give up? And anyway, Kurumi-chan, you’re the same, aren’t you? You keep collecting Pocket Ojisan because you like older men!”

“I mean, I’m not exactly into older men or anything like that… So Fujiko-senpai, that was your thing…?”

Fujiko-san, surprise confession: she has a thing for older men. Turns out she loves middle-aged guys.

And from that revelation came another answer.

Yes.
The reason Kurumi calls me “geezer.”

It was simply because I looked old—like an actual old man.

This confession from a heroine hit way harder than when I found out Kyouko-chan had perverted fantasies about defiling me.

“Meg-chan… for the sake of childhood friendship, tell me the truth.”

“U-um, yeah, anything…”

“Should I be happy about Fujiko-san’s confession? Is an older-looking harem protagonist even a thing? Do I have to fight other Pocket Ojisan like Johnny-san does?”

“N-n-no! Of course you should be happy! Norio’s had that old-man face since elementary school!”

“Meg-chan, I know you’re trying to comfort me, but you’re just pouring salt in the wound.”

Just then, the rice cooker finished with its completion melody.

I glanced back at Fujiko-san and saw her hands clasped together in prayer as she gazed at me.

That’s right. I’m a harem protagonist.

I can’t let a heroine feel anxious just because someone said I had an old face.

I spread both arms wide toward Fujiko-san and declared:

“Fujiko-san, you’re definitely a heroine. From now on, show me your beautiful, radiant smile—only for me!”

“Norio-kun!”

Fujiko-san responded to my words and jumped into my arms.

We embraced and gazed into each other’s eyes.

“Norio-kun, I love you♡”

“Heh, you’re a hopeless kitten, that’s for sure. From today on, you’re one of my harem heroines too.”

“Yes♡”

And I kissed Fujiko-san’s lips, then released her from my embrace.

After Fujiko-san stepped back from my arms, Kurumi called out to her: “Congrats.”

Fujiko-san raised her right fist high into the air and shouted from the bottom of her belly: “Pocket Ojisan, caught!”—expressing her joy.

And so, the former classmate once called a main heroine candidate fell into becoming one of my harem heroines.

A busty, gyaru childhood friend.
A serious, beautiful senpai with gap appeal.
A perverted, beautiful female teacher who’s a masochist and fujoshi.
And now, a chuunibyou, older-man enthusiast, proper beautiful girl.

Everyone’s a first-class beauty, yet there’s an undeniable sense of tackiness and misfortune drifting around these kittens.

Maybe that’s why they fell for me.

Seriously, I’m a man who commits sins. Good grief.