Chapter 8

“Why are you meeting with another girl, Shion? When you have me.”

Akane pressed me coldly. …Where did you learn to act like that?

You could totally play a character like Sadako.

“Well, sometimes you just have to interact with people, you know? Oh, what’s for dinner tonight?”

“Don’t change the subject! And you’re not cheating on me with that woman, are you?”

“I’m not. So, what’s for dinner?”

—At least, not that I remember. If booze isn’t involved, I’m way too scared to even think about cheating.

“Shion, do you really love me?”

“I do. Oh, is it pasta tonight? The water’s boiling. Your pasta is so good, Akane. And you’re cute. So cute. So cute.”

Akane blinked. …Ah, I think I’m in the clear.

“Honestly, Shion! You’re just so in love with me, aren’t you♡ I’ll believe you♡”

How can you be the one to start all this and then just accept that? I’d love for you to explain it in a report. Between 500 and 1000 words. Make sure to cite your references. It’s a matter of life and death. Disclose your sources.

“Listen up! You’re not going to see that bitch again! Got it!?”

Calling your boyfriend’s junior a bitch.

“Yes, ma’am.”

I bowed deeply, like a hotel concierge.

“Okay then, let’s eat! Shion guessed right! It’s pasta!”

“YEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!”

A delicious meal, guaranteed. At least for now, I’d survived the first round of this death match.

—But it’s not like I want to see Sora-chan either. I’m confident it would shave years off my life.

But if I don’t meet with her… she’ll send the picture of us kissing while I was asleep to my girlfriend. If it were just a matter of “getting yelled at,” that would be one thing. In the worst-case scenario, it could turn into “a talk about my departure from this world.”

Basically, it’s a confirmed death sentence.

And so—

I’ll go on just one date with her. But I won’t do anything shady. I’ll handle it in a strictly businesslike, mechanical way, like a morning briefing. And while I’m at it, I’ll break up with Akane, too.

Completely perfect.

“Some people may be opposed to lying, but those people get killed by a thrown kitchen knife.”

My internal ethics committee is operating as usual today.

Lie to put Sora-chan off, and break up with Akane without getting caught. It’s the only way to secure a peaceful college life.

Who the hell set me up for this ordeal? I must have done way too much evil in my past life. What kind of karma is this?

“Shion, you’re just so wonderful, so that bitch is definitely after you. Later, I’m gonna punch her right in the face, and then—”

Don’t go straight for the face. That’s a level of bloodlust that would surprise even a pro wrestler.

The Great Psycho-Lover Battle… please, I’m begging you, just hold it somewhere I’m not. Just fight it out amongst yourselves!

＊＊＊

After we finished the pasta and I could finally catch my breath.

“Well, it’s getting late, so I’ll walk you home.”

“Huh?”

“Huh?”

“I’m staying over, though?”

“…The last train hasn’t left yet, you know?”

“This makes you happier too, doesn’t it, Shion♡”

“Ohhh, yessss… haha, this is brutal.”

Announcing that Psycho-Lover Time has gone into overtime. If we include stoppage time, I’m worried about the player’s fatigue. Can I go home now…?

Chapter 9

Today is the day of my “final date” with Sora-chan.

In preparation for that, I had drinks with Akane last night.

Akane’s a lightweight.

As a couple, we’re both terrible with alcohol.

I casually chose a non-alcoholic drink for myself and gave Akane an alcoholic one.

Even with a juice-like drink that’s only 3% alcohol, she’s out in an instant.

I can at least handle it better than her.

She turns into a kissing fiend when she drinks.

There’s no doubt she was drunk last night.

By the way, I have a countermeasure for a persistent kissing fiend.

That’s right. Konjac jelly.

If you press the konjac jelly against her lips, she’ll mistake it for being “in the middle of a kiss” and fall asleep satisfied.

What is she, a baby with a bottle?

※The konjac jelly was later enjoyed by the staff.

On days she drinks, Akane won’t wake up for about half the day.

In other words—I can completely hide the time I spend on this cheating date.

In the myth, they say Susanoo defeated the Yamata-no-Orochi by treating it to sake.

Right now, I’m basically a modern-day Susanoo.

Fujiwara Susanoo Shion.

Actually, Akane has a spare key to my place, so there’s no problem if I lock the door when I leave.

…I don’t remember giving her one, but hey, it’s more convenient that she has it.

“Shion… hehe ♡”

I wonder what she’s dreaming about.

She’s so cute when she’s asleep.

I gently poke her cheek.

…Yep, it’s fine. She’s asleep.

She’s truly captivating when she’s sleeping so peacefully.

With her looks, she’s admirable, devoted, and a great cook. There are even times when she’s gentle.

Back when we started dating, when I caught a cold, she came over after school and made me congee.

For someone like me who had just started living alone, it was a relief to have someone I could rely on.

She basically believes whatever I say.

If I say, “I love you,” she believes it unconditionally.

If I say, “I’m not cheating,” she believes it.

…It’s just that the frequency of her needing to hear it is a little unhinged.

Lying to her feels like deceiving an innocent child; honestly, it makes me feel guilty.

—However, she is a psycho-lover.

That single point is a flaw so massive it cancels out all of her good qualities.

I carefully opened the door, trying to avoid a creeeak.

Almost to the hallway.

…Alright. She’s not awake. I’m good.

“Hehehehe…”

She laughed. Wait, is she awake?

“Akaneee. I love youuu?”

“…”

…Okay, she’s asleep.

If she were awake, she’d definitely have reacted.

“Your head is next♡”

…Sleep-talking.

I got goosebumps.

My whole body shuddered.

I instantly locked the door and bolted from the apartment.

This is no joke.

The only situation where it’s okay to aim for the head should be in an FPS game.

I couldn’t help but break into a run, leaving as if I were escaping.

The place I’m heading to is a death trap.

It’s a stage of condemnation called “cheating.”

I have no choice but to keep lying.

—That is the only way to survive in this “hell.”