Chapter 41: The Next Day’s Study Session (Boyfriend’s Perspective ①)

The next day, there was a study session again.

Yesterday’s study session was awful.

The studying itself actually went pretty well. I made progress on subjects I usually can’t focus on, and I even cleared up some questions I was stuck on. The problem was the love talk during the snack party afterward. I accidentally overshared about my girlfriend and ended up embarrassing myself. I got weird looks from everyone. It was seriously the worst.

That’s why I wasn’t really in the mood to participate today.

But I barely got any studying done alone at home last night, and the study session environment actually helps me concentrate. So… I guess I’ll go again today.

Besides, there’s something I want to say to that guy.

The next day, the study session was starting just like yesterday.

Desks were pushed together into a big layout so everyone could easily teach and ask questions.

There were noticeably more people than yesterday, which surprised me. Some familiar faces, plus new ones who must’ve heard the rumors that it was fun.

We were already past ten people.

Alright, no weird stuff today, I told myself as I took a seat.

I came here to study, so I’m keeping unnecessary talk to a minimum!

…Ah, there he is. The guy who gave me that annoying advice yesterday. Even though we’re in the same class, we’re in different circles, so I never really approached him before.

I should at least say one thing to him.

That I’m sorry.

Because that single line he said actually caused a small shift in my relationship with my girlfriend.

I hadn’t told her about the study session.

So she was probably getting suspicious about why I wasn’t replying quickly during this test period when I don’t even have club activities.

On the way home, I casually glanced at my phone.

Haah… I’m so tired—

Wait, what?

The notification showed over 100 unread messages.

Huh? I don’t remember having that many pending. At first I thought it was spam, but every single message was from the same person.

Her.

“Hey, wanna walk home together today?”

“When do you finish?”

“Hey, what’s wrong? Are you okay?”

“Reply to me”

“Are you okay?”

“What are you doing right now?”

“You’re not with another girl, are you?”

Dozens of messages like that kept coming. Honestly, it filled me with nothing but fear.

What the hell is this? I already thought she was getting heavy, but this was on another level.

Even if I took a while to reply, it was only two or three hours at most. This was straight-up shocking.

This doesn’t feel like “heavy” anymore… it’s starting to feel like stalking.

If I stay in this relationship, isn’t this going to become dangerous?

In the end, I sent her one simple message:

“Let’s break up”

Phew. That should settle it. If I block her, we’ll basically be done. We don’t have that many mutual friends anyway.

I sent the break-up message with that casual mindset.

It was read in an instant. Then, terrifyingly fast, a new wave of messages came flying back.

“What? What’s going on?”

“No. I absolutely refuse to break up”

“Did someone tell you to say that?”

Scary. Too scary.

It had already gone far beyond fear and straight into dread.

This wasn’t the girl I knew. She never used to be like this.

Then suddenly, I remembered what that guy had said to me yesterday.

“She really likes you, huh.”

Is this what liking someone looks like?

Because it doesn’t match the kind of “like” I understand at all.

My idea of liking someone is much lighter… If you want to meet, then meet, but you should also give each other space, right?

Just what the hell is this gap between us?

And how am I supposed to close it?

Chapter 41: The Next Day’s Study Session (Boyfriend’s Perspective ②)

Because of her massive flood of messages, I ended up agreeing to meet her in person.

Honestly, it was the only way to stop the barrage.

Haah, I really didn’t want to do this. Isn’t this the exact pattern where you can’t actually break up once you meet face-to-face?

We decided to meet at the small park nearby.

This was one of our usual spots. Just being here brought back a ton of memories.

We used to buy snacks from the dagashi shop and eat them here, or just sit and talk for hours.

I never thought we’d be breaking up in this place… I really believed we’d be together forever.

Man, this is getting way too sentimental. Must be because it’s nighttime.

After about ten minutes, she finally showed up.

She was wearing a loose dress and sneakers. Even under the dim park lights, I could clearly see her eyes were bright red. Probably cried because of my message. Yeah, no surprise there.

She quietly said “Sorry I’m late,” then fell silent.

I didn’t know what to say either. The resolve I had earlier had cooled off, especially now that I was face-to-face with her and all our memories.

Looking at her again properly, she hadn’t really changed at all. And not in a bad way.

She still had that pretty hair and graceful presence, just like back in middle school. I knew that if she smiled, it would still be beautiful.

The only difference was her eyes. And that was entirely my fault.

Maybe I was the one who changed more than she did.

Lately, I had only been seeing her as annoying. I’d basically only been interacting with her through text.

But seeing her in person after so long, all the old feelings started coming back. The reasons I fell for her in the first place.

My determination to break up suddenly felt shaky.

Then, out of nowhere, that guy’s words flashed through my mind again.

“She’s probably just anxious. If you tell her you like her, I’m sure she’ll be happy.”

Wait… when was the last time I actually told her “I like you”?

I used to say it all the time when we first started dating. But recently? I couldn’t even remember.

She had been saying it constantly, so I just half-assed it with “Me too~” without really thinking.

Was my vague, half-hearted attitude what pushed her love into this direction?

Plus, I had no mental leeway lately. High school life, new environment, club, studying… I was mentally drained.

That’s why her messages slowly started feeling like nothing but a burden.

But after hearing what that guy said, I started wondering if she was just really bad at expressing affection.

In a completely different way than me.

Once I thought about it that way, the desire to break up suddenly vanished.

Damn, I really am selfish.

I know that. But if I don’t say this now, we really will break up.

I took a deep breath and spoke.

“Sorry… I said I wanted to break up and called you out here, but… I actually don’t want to break up after all. Sorry for being selfish.”

I nervously looked at her face.

She looked shocked for a second, then her expression bloomed into pure happiness.

“Yeah! I don’t want to break up either!”

She said, then jumped straight into my arms.

Ahh… Right.

This smile. This was what I loved most about her.

After that, we sat down and talked properly.

What bothered me, what she wanted, how often we should meet, everything.

The more we talked, the clearer it became what she actually needed and what I had been finding burdensome.

We were finally standing at the starting line of a new relationship.

Her message volume didn’t really drop. She still sends heavy stuff and sometimes spams me.

But now that I understand what she wants and what those messages actually mean, the way I feel when I read them has completely changed.

I guess I’ve slowly started getting used to it… and honestly, it’s not so bad.

Yeah. Familiarity really is something.

Also… I should probably thank that guy later. He might not be such a bad dude after all.

For now, I’m heading to today’s study session.

And after that, I’m walking home with her.

Later.

Chapter 42: The Next Day’s Study Session (Boyfriend’s Perspective ②)

Because of her massive flood of messages, I ended up agreeing to meet her in person.

Honestly, it was the only way to stop the barrage.

Haah, I really didn’t want to do this. Isn’t this the exact pattern where you can’t actually break up once you meet face-to-face?

We decided to meet at the small park nearby.

This was one of our usual spots. Just being here brought back a ton of memories.

We used to buy snacks from the dagashi shop and eat them here, or just sit and talk for hours.

I never thought we’d be breaking up in this place… I really believed we’d be together forever.

Man, this is getting way too sentimental. Must be because it’s nighttime.

After about ten minutes, she finally showed up.

She was wearing a loose dress and sneakers. Even under the dim park lights, I could clearly see her eyes were bright red. Probably cried because of my message. Yeah, no surprise there.

She quietly said “Sorry I’m late,” then fell silent.

I didn’t know what to say either. The resolve I had earlier had cooled off, especially now that I was face-to-face with her and all our memories.

Looking at her again properly, she hadn’t really changed at all. And not in a bad way.

She still had that pretty hair and graceful presence, just like back in middle school. I knew that if she smiled, it would still be beautiful.

The only difference was her eyes. And that was entirely my fault.

Maybe I was the one who changed more than she did.

Lately, I had only been seeing her as annoying. I’d basically only been interacting with her through text.

But seeing her in person after so long, all the old feelings started coming back. The reasons I fell for her in the first place.

My determination to break up suddenly felt shaky.

Then, out of nowhere, that guy’s words flashed through my mind again.

“She’s probably just anxious. If you tell her you like her, I’m sure she’ll be happy.”

Wait… when was the last time I actually told her “I like you”?

I used to say it all the time when we first started dating. But recently? I couldn’t even remember.

She had been saying it constantly, so I just half-assed it with “Me too~” without really thinking.

Was my vague, half-hearted attitude what pushed her love into this direction?

Plus, I had no mental leeway lately. High school life, new environment, club, studying… I was mentally drained.

That’s why her messages slowly started feeling like nothing but a burden.

But after hearing what that guy said, I started wondering if she was just really bad at expressing affection.

In a completely different way than me.

Once I thought about it that way, the desire to break up suddenly vanished.

Damn, I really am selfish.

I know that. But if I don’t say this now, we really will break up.

I took a deep breath and spoke.

“Sorry… I said I wanted to break up and called you out here, but… I actually don’t want to break up after all. Sorry for being selfish.”

I nervously looked at her face.

She looked shocked for a second, then her expression bloomed into pure happiness.

“Yeah! I don’t want to break up either!”

She said, then jumped straight into my arms.

Ahh… Right.

This smile. This was what I loved most about her.

After that, we sat down and talked properly.

What bothered me, what she wanted, how often we should meet, everything.

The more we talked, the clearer it became what she actually needed and what I had been finding burdensome.

We were finally standing at the starting line of a new relationship.

Her message volume didn’t really drop. She still sends heavy stuff and sometimes spams me.

But now that I understand what she wants and what those messages actually mean, the way I feel when I read them has completely changed.

I guess I’ve slowly started getting used to it… and honestly, it’s not so bad.

Yeah. Familiarity really is something.

Also… I should probably thank that guy later. He might not be such a bad dude after all.

For now, I’m heading to today’s study session.

And after that, I’m walking home with her.