Chapter 21: I Want to Awaken a Possessive-Type Talent — Side Story: From Her Point of View④

I started seeing myself objectively for the first time.

And once I did, I started noticing things—like just how selfish my behavior had been up until now, and how arrogant my attitude really was.

Ahh… that’s why, even when I make female friends, they end up drifting away. And why boyfriends always dump me so quickly, too. I finally get it now. In the end, I’m just the worst. I haven’t changed at all since elementary school. I mean, all I really hated was being alone, but still.

And the boy who made me realize all of that… does he hate me now, too? Well, yeah. Of course he does. Who would ever like someone as selfish and awful as me? I never said thank you. I only demanded things—what an awful person.

I’m sure my boyfriend will dump me again, and from here on out… there won’t be anyone who’ll ever like me again.

But I thought we could’ve stayed friends. No—I wanted to stay close to him.

While I was thinking all that, suddenly—

“Hey, hey. There’s something I want to ask you,”

he said to me.

Huh? No way! He said that to me?

I couldn’t believe the situation I was in.

You’ve gotta be kidding. He never once seemed like he was going to rely on me before. Why? How come? Why would he ask me for anything?

No, who cares about the reason! I’ll do anything for you!

After that, he started asking me for favors more often. And I was so happy that I lent him anything—CDs, notebooks, whatever. Then he’d smile with this really happy look on his face and say,

“Thanks.”

Just like that.

Ahh… I wanted to see that expression. The one I thought he’d never show me. Again and again and again.

And that’s when it hit me.

Ahh… I want to see more faces like that. Not just his—everyone’s. And especially my boyfriend’s, the one I love so much.

So after that, I started constantly reaching out to people who looked like they were struggling, or people who seemed like they wanted something done. I wanted to see all kinds of expressions on people’s faces. Before, I honestly didn’t care about anyone around me—but now I’m different.

I feel like I can see people’s expressions more clearly than before, and I think I’ve gotten better at considering how the other person feels, too.

Somehow, it feels like the people around me have become a little kinder to me, too. Huh. So if I change even a little, the people around me change, too.

Maybe the one who kept obsessing over the past and stubbornly digging my heels in… was me.

And then I was able to apologize to my boyfriend on my own.

Before, there was no way I could ever apologize first. No way! Ever!

Because even when I wasn’t in the wrong, I always thought, He’s the one who should apologize to me first.

But now I understand. If you love someone, you have to care about how they feel. You have to do things that can make them smile.

Even though I apologized, I honestly thought he might not forgive me. That’s how awful I used to be. Even I wouldn’t have wanted to date me.

But my boyfriend forgave me.

“It’s fine. Sorry—my bad too,” he said.

Ahh… I realized I’d been treating such a good person so horribly for so long.

From there, I started actively doing what he wanted—things that seemed like they’d make him happy—because I wanted to see all kinds of expressions on his face.

But I still get anxious, and if he’s talking to another girl, I get jealous and end up blaming him. And I call him over and over at night.

Sometimes I even corner him hard.

But even when I do that, he still says this to me—

“It’s okay. I only have you.”

I think I changed so much it’s like I was reborn.

And it’s all thanks to him.

He’s really amazing. He’s my savior.

He accepted me. He made me realize what I was missing.

Because of him, I was reborn.

Maybe he really is different from everyone else, somehow.

Maybe I can love him in a different way than I love my boyfriend… or something like that.

Chapter 22: From the Boyfriend’s Perspective

“Hey—can you block this girl on social media?”

“Hey—what were you talking about with that girl earlier?”

“Hey—do you even like me?”

Lately, she’s been noisy. Or rather… her obsession with me is just not normal.

I mean, yeah, I’d kind of heard rumors. People told me I shouldn’t date her.

They said she’s cute, but she’s heavy, annoying, and she gets mad a lot.

But, like… she’s cute, and she’s actually pretty easy to talk to, so I ended up wanting her as my girlfriend anyway. So I confessed, like, I like you. And then she gave me this amazing smile and said yes.

And I thought, Oh man, she’s so cute. I want to see that smile more.

At first I thought, This is totally different from the rumors. She was always smiling, and she listened to me like, This is fun, this is fun, and all that. So I figured everyone just hadn’t noticed how great she really was. I thought, I can totally date her for a long time.

But little by little, that selfish side started showing. She’d tell me not to talk to my female friends, or she’d say I had to tell her I loved her every day…

At first I thought maybe she was just lonely, so I nodded along to everything, and I always answered her calls. But honestly, when it’s like that every single day, it wears you down.

Huh? Again? Like, again?

That’s when I realized, Oh. This is what people mean by “heavy.”

When I was getting exhausted from that constant heaviness, I got a message from a female friend for the first time in a while.

She asked something like, You seem tired—are you okay? and I ended up venting without thinking.

I knew. I knew it deep down. Ahh, she’s aiming for me, isn’t she? Pretending to listen just so she can pull me in. But I couldn’t keep going unless I complained to someone.

Because if I told my guy friends, they’d definitely hit me with, Didn’t we tell you not to date her? And if I told a female friend who actually knew her, they’d probably start trash-talking her. I wanted to tell someone who didn’t know her.

I’m just… tired.

So when she snooped through my phone without permission, I seriously lost it.

I’ve been holding back this whole time, I’ve been putting up with your selfish demands, so why are you doing things that only think about yourself like this?

Let’s respect each other’s privacy. Why am I the only one who has to endure everything while you do nothing?

I want to praise myself for being able to say, “Let’s take some space.” To be honest, it felt like even the energy to say that had been taken from me by her.

Honestly, it was a relief. While I was dating her, she took up so much of my time that I couldn’t do anything I actually wanted to do.

But once I started keeping some distance from her, I could do the things I liked, and I could hang out with my friends again. Honestly, I felt nothing but fulfilled.

So while we were apart, I didn’t think about her that much, and I started thinking maybe it’d be fine if things just ended naturally like this.

A few weeks after I started keeping distance from her, a female friend suddenly said to me,

“Hey, did you know? About Sugisawa-san.”

And I was like, Ugh—another bad rumor? Dating her seriously meant nothing but rumors, and it sucked. I just wanted to break up already.

But this time, it was different.

Apparently, lately, she’d changed.

She’d started being kinder to people around her, and she’d started saying thank you, too.

I mean… isn’t that just normal? Wait, she wasn’t even doing stuff like that before? Come to think of it, I don’t think she ever thanked me.

So maybe she changed while we were apart.

While I was thinking that, she said to me,

“I’m sorry. I realized how selfish I was before… so, could we try again? Just one more time?”

No way. That’s definitely a lie. She’d never apologized before, and she wasn’t the type to apologize. I was so shocked I couldn’t even get words out, and before I knew it, I was nodding.

After that, she really did change.

Instead of making selfish demands, she started asking if there was anything she could do, anything she could help with.

Well, basically… she started devoting herself to me. I don’t know what happened while we were apart, but she became genuinely kind and considerate.

But then it hits out of nowhere.

If I talk to a female friend for even a little bit, my notifications blow up, or she cuts into the conversation.

But after something like that happens, without fail, she says—

“I’m sorry. But I love you, so I get worried someone will take you from me.”

Huh? What is that. She’s way too cute.

If that’s the kind of heaviness it is, I’ll take it any day. Lean on me as much as you want.

It’s like… this heaviness feels like she really values me, and that makes me want to value her even more. It gets addictive.

Was she always this kind of person deep down? Because the old her definitely wasn’t like this.

What happened while we were apart?