Love

Under the cloudless blue sky, I ran with sweat dripping down my forehead.

It was a weekday, the time when classes would normally be in session.

Through the quiet streets, I dashed.

I had only one destination in mind: to be with the one I love.

As I sorted through the swirling emotions in my mind, I struggled to catch my breath.

This path, too, was one that I had walked with Yukine recently.

Despite the reluctance to leave home, she would come to pick me up from school just to spend even a second with me, chatting as we walked home together.

Surging forward, I swiftly arrived home and passed through the entrance.

I kicked off my shoes, climbed the stairs to the second floor, and reached the door to Yukine’s room.

In the stillness of the house, only the sound of my ragged breath echoed.

But beyond this door, there was no doubt that Yukine was there.

Taking a deep breath, I knocked on the door.

“Yuki? Can I come in?”

But there was no response to my words.

I couldn’t help but remember the first time I came to this house. It was the day I first met Yukine.

Yes, at first, I knocked on this door countless times because I wanted to see Yukine, because I wanted to talk to her.

Even though she wouldn’t come out at all, after a series of trial and error, I finally managed to face her.

It’s strange how even those memories now seem nostalgic.

“Yuki, I want you to listen to me. Please.”

Only my voice, mixed with rough breaths, echoes in the silence.

Yuki doesn’t come out. It’s as if we’ve gone back to the time when we first met, as if time has rewound itself.

But I couldn’t give up.

And I did not want to.

“I’m sorry, Yukine. I haven’t been facing your feelings properly. Even though you were trying to convey them to me, I couldn’t accept them properly. I’m really sorry.”

I take a deep breath and continue.

“Despite saying I’m your older brother, I hurt you, Yukine. People’s feelings shouldn’t be taken lightly… You’re a girl before being my little sister… I’m sorry.”

All the things I need to apologize for float in my mind. I verbalize each one, hoping they reach Yukine on the other side of the door.

“I’m sorry for being such a half-hearted  big brother. But from now on, I’ll do better. I won’t leave things half-finished. I’ll face delicate feelings head-on, even if it scares me.”

Human emotions are contradictory. They can be as thorny as roses when you try to touch them, yet as warm as an embrace, making you want to hold onto them tighter.

They can be overwhelmingly heavy and large, but they fit perfectly in your hand with just a single word or a change in perspective.

I want to become someone who can handle people’s feelings properly. 

No, I have to become that person.

“I might not seem capable of that, and you might doubt if I can do it… But I believe it’s essential to have that kind of strength to make someone’s life happy.”

To protect someone, you need strength. That’s why…

“To be able to protect important people, to be able to help them… I’ll show that determination through my actions from now on. So, please give me the right to say it.”

I might not have the right to return that weight to someone as weak as me.

But it has to be now. I vow to change from this point forward.

I clench my fist, resolve myself, and speak those words.

“Yukine, I love you, Yukine.”

The two words “I love you” that escaped my lips carried warmth, as if they had a flavor that could be tasted, slipping out through my nose.

“So, Yukine. Will you let me stay by your side from now on?”

The moment I uttered those words, the door swung open with a powerful rush of air. 

A gentle breeze danced in, adding weight to the atmosphere.

The familiar fragrance tickled my nostrils.

The silky, silver strands of hair brushed against my cheek, gently teasing.

The soft sensation of Yukine’s arms, as white as snow, wrapped around my neck.

I embraced her gently, as if cradling an infant, and held her close.

“Nii-san…”

“Yukine…”

After a few moments of silence, Yukine pulled back slightly to look at me. 

Tears shimmered faintly in her diamond-like eyes, and my reflection appeared distorted in those clear eyes.

“Nii-san, are you serious about those words?”

“Yeah, I am. Why would I lie?”

“You’ll take responsibility, right? I won’t let you go anymore, Nii-san.”

“I promise, I’m prepared for that.”

“Really? You know I’m a handful, Nii-san.”

“Even so, it’s okay. I actually like that about you.”

“I’ll get mad if I see you with other girls, and I’ll sulk if you don’t treat me right. And I’ll cling to you all the time, okay?”

“That’s exactly what I want.”

Because, I think I love even that side of Yukine.

I love everything about the person I love.

“Fufu, then I can just be myself, right? I can stay as I am?”

“Of course. I’ll accept everything. It might sound not much now, but I plan to make your life happy, Yukine. So, I love you just the way you are.”

“Nii-san!!!”

Yukine hugged me tightly.

I returned the embrace with equal fervor, sharing our love.

From now on, there will be no barriers between us.

“We’ll always be together, Niisan.”

“Yeah, that’s right, Yukine.”

―And so, we embraced in our own little world.

Feeling the newfound love between us.

This is what it means to love, I wanted to shout.