The Reason Why I was Cheated on By My Girlfriend - Chapter 50

Hold Me Gently and Shout Your Love

Yua’s POV

Right now, I am waiting for Haru-kun.

I continue to wait, hugging my knees in his empty room.

My chest feels tight.

Every time I think of him, the pain deep within my heart grows.

And yet, it feels so comforting.

The only pure thing left in me is my memories with Haru-kun and the love I still feel for him.

(…I wonder what he’s doing right now.)

I can’t stop thinking about Haru-kun.

I’m imagining him on a date with a beautiful girl who isn’t me.

It hurts. It’s painful.

I feel like I’m going to lose my mind.

Haha, I’m amazing, am I not?

Even though I’m already broken for quite some time, I still can act normal in front of Haru-kun.

…normal?

What’s that again?

Is it asking for selfish things, like being hugged from behind by a boy who already has a girlfriend?

Haha, that’s so ridiculous.

There is nothing normal about me.

“…Haru-kun.”

I hug his pillow tightly.

I must seem like a total pervert…no, I indeed am a pervert.

I can’t live without Haru-kun.

If I don’t smell his scent, I’ll surely go crazy.

I’m so happy.

It’s like being embraced by Haru-kun tightly.

“…ahahaha.”

If I had relied on Haru-kun from the beginning, I wouldn’t have felt this way.

If I had relied on Haru-kun from the beginning, that girl wouldn’t have stolen him away from me.

Why didn’t I trust him?

Why…couldn’t I hold myself back?

“Hmphh…nhnnn…”

My body feels hot.

The urge that’s driving me crazy has not yet subside.

“…no.”

I hug his pillow tightly.

If it were Haru-kun, I’d probably be squeezing hard enough to leave bruises.

“…Haru-kun.”

I call his name.

Just picturing his face gives me the strength to endure it.

Maybe I just want to forget.

I think I just want to overwrite those unbearably painful memories with pleasure.

I was such an idiot.

Just being by Haru-kun’s side would have been enough…

─suddenly, my phone vibrates.

“Haru-kun…?”

I feel sad when I see the message.

It seems Haru-kun won’t be coming home today.

“…the lab, huh?”

That’s nothing unusual.

Haru-kun sometimes spends the night on the lab, helping his father’s research.

“Did he go straight there after the date?”

After mumbling to myself, I suddenly feel happy.

Because, Haru-kun took the time to message me.

‘I can’t come home today.’

Isn’t that something a married couple would do, sending such a considerate message?

“Haru-kun is thinking about me.”

I know I’m doing something terrible.

No, that’s not true. I’m not doing anything wrong.

I just want everything to go back to how it was.

I just want Haru-kun back.

“…Haru-kun.”

I hug his pillow tightly.

“…Haru-kun.”

I lie down on his bed.

“…Haru-kun.”

I take a deep breath and close my eyes.

Because, no matter how long I wait, Haru-kun won’t come home.

Then, there’s no point in staying awake.

Time without Haru-kun is meaningless.

…

……

—footsteps.

“Welcome back.”

I said so the moment the door to the room opened.

“…I’m back.”

Haru-kun’s eyes widen in surprise, then he said so with a nervous expression on his face.

In that instant, I realize.

I have seen through his lie.

“Did you have fun?”

Haru-kun’s expression stiffens.

“Your overnight date with Kaguya-chan.”

Haru-kun looks down.

I figured everything out just by his reaction.

“Hey, why did you lie?”

I stand up and walk towards him.

Then, I reach out my hand and whisper.

“You really think about me a lot, aren’t you?”

I smile happily.

An overnight date with your girlfriend—normally, you’d be so excited that nothing else would matter.

However, Haru-kun contacted me, just that one small thing made me so happy.

“…let’s sleep together tonight, Haru-kun.”

I said so, peering into his expression.

“Yua.”

Haru-kun said so and let out a heavy sigh.

“Let’s end this now.”

“……”

“Let’s go back to being just normal childhood friends.”

“……”

“Please.”

“……”

“No.”

I give my obvious answer.

I’m not doing this with the intention of backing down now.

“Haru-kun, resisting is futile and will only make you suffer, you know?”

It’s not that my heart isn’t in pain.

Every time I feel that pain in my heart, I feel like I’m having my heart broken all over again.

“Haru-kun, you can’t abandon me.”

I turn all of that into strength and say,

“After all, I’ve already betrayed you a long time ago.”

“I’m sorry.”

Haru-kun bows his head.

“It’s all my fault. So…just for today, I won’t back down.”

“……”

“I see.”

Haru-kun looks up.

He has a puzzled expression on his face.

He is so adorable.

Feeling the utmost happiness, I tell him,

“Well then, I’ll just die.”

“…huh?”

“A life without Haru-kun isn’t worth living.”

I stand on top of his desk.

It’s about a meter high, but if I fall the wrong way, it can easily be fatal.

“Bye-bye.”

I spread my arms wide and fall backwards.

Immediately after, I feel the sensation that I’ve expected.

“…ahaha, Haru-kun is crying.”

Haru-kun is crying as he catches me.

I feel sad, very sad.

I’m making him suffer with my ridiculous actions.

I’m the worst, I’m truly awful.

However, at the same time—I’m happy.

Haru-kun can’t abandon me after all.

So I take advantage of that.

It’s the same. Just like how Kaguya-chan approached Haru-kun when he was vulnerable.

Dirty? Cowardly?

Ahaha, that’s right.

I am tainted.

Having chosen this method without any hesitation, I become painfully aware of this.

“I won’t ask you to break up with Kaguya-chan…”

I lied. I actually want Haru-kun to break up with Kaguya-chan.

“I just want to be with you forever. That’s all. Really, that’s all.”

Appealing to emotions didn’t work.

“I love you. I love you so much, Haru-kun.”

Even arousing his sexual desire didn’t work either.

“Look at me. Touch me more. It’s fine if it’s a lie, just say kind words to me.”

So that means, there’s only one thing left, my life.

“If you want to end this, you have no choice but to kill me.”

Ahaha, Haru-kun looks so shocked.

I know. It’s sad, isn’t it? The me you know would never say such things.

Or maybe you’re suffering because you made me this way.

“…Haru-kun, you’re too kind.”

You’ve always been like that.

Haru-kun is the type to keep things to himself.

When something bad happens, he doesn’t blame others.

He thinks it’s his own fault and tries to change himself.

He’s wonderful, truly wonderful.

I think that’s why everyone likes you.

“That’s why you’re being taken advantage of.”

The beautiful memories end here.

I accept my tainted self and gently touch his cheek.

“By a bad woman like me.”

I feel a shiver down my spine.

I feel sad, it’s painful, and I’m on the verge of crying, yet it also feels like the first time I orgasmed.

Haru-kun is the best after all.

This feels so much better than having sex with a stranger.

“…Yua, please.”

“……”

“…no one will be happy if this goes any further.”

“……”

“I’ll do anything. So…!”

“Okay.”

Anything, huh?

“Let’s have sex then.”

“……”

“Just once. Then, I’ll give up.”

“……”

“Because, you see, I’m really pitiful. I was sexually assaulted by strangers, my beloved Haru-kun was stolen from me, and all that’s left are dirty memories…”

“……”

“Please overwrite them.”

“……”

“Haru-kun, please. Just once, make me the happiest person in the world.”

I empty my heart and say all the words that come to mind.

Haru-kun is shedding large tears.

I’ve never seen Haru-kun made that kind of expression before.

“…can’t we do anything else?”

“Why? Sex is not that big of a deal.”

I said so.

“We are just going to rub each other’s pleasurable spots. It’ll be fine. I’ll take the lead.”

I use everything I have to seduce him.

“It’s okay if you get me pregnant. I have money. I won’t trouble you.”

His expression doesn’t change.

Seeing that makes me happy.

I see, that’s how it is.

Sex is still something special to Haru-kun.

And more importantly…

He hasn’t done it with Kaguya-chan.

“Hey, should I make a compromise?”

A devil is born within me.

“Just a kiss is fine.”

I surrender myself to the devil.

“In exchange, do it every day. Until I die. Forever.”

I’m sure I have an incredibly ecstatic expression right now.

“It’s okay if you change your mind halfway through, you can just have sex with me. Either kiss me until I die or have sex just once and be done with it. Choose whichever you prefer. Of course, you can also kiss me as much as you want, have sex with me as much as you want, and just dump me in the end.”

I hold Haru-kun’s cheek.

Then, I slowly bring my face closer.

“Wait.”

I stop at Haru-kun’s word.

“Promise me. Other than that, everything will go back to the way it was before. Swear to me.”

“…of course.”

──

“Ehehe.”

It’s just a brief kiss.

Yet it feels incredibly thrilling. It’s the happiest moment of my life.

“You betrayed Kaguya-chan again.”

I lied. I have no intention to end it with just a kiss.

Because, it’s strange.

I’m the one who love Haru-kun first.

I’m the one who love Haru-kun more.

I’m the one who know Haru-kun better.

We’ve always been together.

We are supposed to be together forever.

However, everything…everything is taken away from me.

So, I’ll take it all back.

I won’t hesitate to use any means.

─at this moment, I have decided.

It’s simple.

I know exactly how to get him back.

Ah, what was it again?

The words that Kaguya-chan had told haru-kun.

Ah, that’s right, I remembered.

It was—

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Are we really going to do it at school?”

In the classroom where Haru-kun and Kaguya-chan always spend their lunchtime together.

After sending a message to Kaguya-chan using Haru-kun’s phone, I tell him,

“It’s fine. No one ever comes here. So…come on, hurry up~”

—do you remember?

Those words really hurt me.

So now, it’s my turn to say it.

I’m just doing the same thing you did to me.

Ahaha, Kaguya-chan, you have such a funny expression on your face.

You’re probably thinking ‘Why’?

I totally get how you feel. I really do.

We are similar. Kaguya-chan might be prettier and cuter than me, but the way we both love Haru-kun and our ways of thinking are quite alike.

Well then, I wonder what will happen.

It’s not like I’m having sex with Haru-kun, it’s just a Frech kiss, but it’s enough to shock the pure Kaguya-chan.

It’s okay, you can run away.

Then I can have Haru-kun all to myself.

Ahahaha, I’m looking forward to it.

Finally, everything will go back to how it was.

—hey, what will you do? Kaguya-chan?