The Most Beautiful Girl in School Has Become a Mother - Chapter 53

After Miori returned, it was during the time when I was giving Shuri a bath and drying her hair.

“Hey, big brother.”

My younger sister suddenly called out to me.

“Hmm? What is it?”

I move the hairdryer a little away and respond to my sister’s voice.

Since Miori is no longer here, Shuri and I have returned to being just siblings. At first, we were bewildered by the change, but now we’ve gotten used to it.

“What kind of person is Mom?”

“Mom? You know Miori, don’t you? She’s kind, caring, and can cook too──”

“Not her, the real mother.”

My hand, which was drying my hair, stopped. Maybe my breath stopped, too. It was too surprising to hear such words come out of Shuri’s mouth.

After taking a breath, I switch the hairdryer to the cool air mode and start drying her hair again.

“Why… are you asking something like that?”

The only words I could muster were those. There was no other way to respond.

“Did someone say something to you at the daycare?”

In response to my question, Shuri shook her head side to side.

That’s true. If something had happened regarding that, Kijima-san would have told me. Yesterday, she just teased me and didn’t mention anything about such matters.

“I’m worried about Mom. I want to see a picture too.”

When Shuri’s hair was about ninety percent dry, I turned off the hairdryer.

“…Not really.”

I say the answer I had prepared in advance.

One day, if Shuri asked about our mother, I thought I would answer like that. At least, I thought it would be fine until she started elementary school.

That’s probably because I didn’t want to talk about it much either.

“I don’t have a picture of our mom. So, I’m sorry.”

“Yay! I want to see the pictures!”

My sister immediately raised an objection.

That reaction slightly irritates me. I would normally obediently listen, but why is it that she always tries to delve into places I don’t want her to?

“What’s not there is not there. Don’t be unreasonable.”

Actually, there is. It’s hidden deep in the back of my room’s closet.

Since she wanted to know about our real mother, maybe I should have shown her. Surely, that would have been the best solution.

But why? At that moment, for some reason, I was rejecting it. I instantly thought that I didn’t want to show it, and didn’t want to talk about our mother.

“Yay! I want to see it! I want to see Mom’s picture!”

Shuri says, throwing a tantrum.

That reaction made me more irritated than I could have ever anticipated. A dark, heavy emotion filled my chest. It was a feeling I should never have towards my sister.

I thought I could endure it. But I couldn’t. I was unusually irritated by Shuri’s attitude and questions.

“I told you… It’s not there!”

And then, when I reached my limit of frustration, I ended up shouting loudly, surprising even myself.

After saying it, I thought, “Oh no,” but it was already too late.

Shuri stood up with tears welling up in her eyes and ran out of the living room.

“Hey, wait up!”

Even though I called out to her, Shuri didn’t stop and went up to the second floor by herself.

I let out a big sigh and roughly grabbed my hair.

“What am I doing, man…”

I was drowning in self-loathing and felt like I might die.

I had never yelled at Shuri or scolded her harshly until now. When she did something wrong or mischievous, instead of yelling and scolding her outright, I made her think for herself about why it was wrong. I let Shuri understand and accept the problem before coming to a conclusion.

I thought it was a bit of a drag. However, since Kijima-san had told me that it was the best educational method, I stuck to it. She said that to nurture a child’s thinking ability, it is better to prioritize making her understand the reason rather than just yelling at her.

Due to everyday stress, it seems that ordinary parents find it difficult to practice this educational method. On the contrary, I thought that precisely because I am not a parent, I could adopt this approach, and I actually could. At least, until today.

But today, it was impossible. For some reason, I couldn’t suppress my irritation and anger at Shuri’s request.

Shuri has never thrown a tantrum before. Even when she asked Miori to play the role of her mother, she didn’t throw a tantrum.

Why was that──I thought for a moment, scolding myself for being such a fool. It was simply because that was what Shuri wanted.

──Why did I get so angry like that…?

At that moment, for a brief instant, Miori’s smile crossed my mind. And in that moment, I understood my own feelings.

When Shuri brought up the topic of our real mother, I felt as if Miori was being denied.

It wasn’t just Miori. I felt like our life as “dad” and “mom” that Miori and I had built over the past month was being denied.

At least, this life that started in April was very enjoyable for me. I felt like my entire enjoyable month was completely denied by Shuri’s one comment. That’s probably why I got so irritated.

I understand Shuri’s feelings of being concerned about our real mother.

But isn’t Miori doing her best to the point where she wouldn’t even notice? She has been trying hard, even though she was anxious, because Shuri wanted to play with her mom. She went to and from the daycare together in the morning and evening, she came to our house several times a week to cook, and she played with Shuri. Just earlier, they were saying “I love you” to each other. She said she wanted to match with Mom, and she chose the matching bear. So why is she saying something like that? I couldn’t understand my sister’s psychology at all.

Miori says, “I’m just doing it because I want to,” but there’s no way she isn’t pushing herself. With more things to do and less personal time, it’s undeniable that some strain is occurring.

I can no longer measure how much I have been helped by her kindness. To be honest, I even thought I could never sleep with my feet facing her.

It’s impossible to expect a child to understand everything. I know that. However, I felt anger at the thought of denying Miori, who has gone that far for us.

──In the end, am I saying that it’s not good to have a meal together…!

What we’re doing is nothing but a trivial matter. I knew that even before we started.

Miori is not Shuri’s mother, so she can’t completely take her place. However, even so, she is doing everything she can. She is a high school student like me, and unlike me, she has no obligations at all.

When I think about how much time and mental energy Miori and I have spent on Shuri, I can’t help but feel angry. Even though I feel sorry for having yelled, I just couldn’t suppress my frustration towards Shuri.

──If it were Miori, what would she say in a situation like this?

I take out my smartphone and open the LIME app.

I opened the message screen with Miori and tried to tap on “Call,” but stopped just short and closed the screen.

What was I planning to talk about when I called Miori? Should I tell her that Shuri is dissatisfied with her? Would I really say something so cruel to someone who has been so devotedly working for Shuri?

Try saying something like that. The magic of this “dad” and “mom” will break at that moment. Our time as a three of us will end there.

There was no way I could consult Miori about something like this. And, of course, there was no way I could forgive Shuri for saying something so cruel.

After finishing the housework, I killed some time watching TV for a while, then went upstairs.

Shuri was sleeping alone, wrapped in a blanket.

I thought about sleeping in my own room, but that would be too childish, so I lay down next to Shuri as usual.

Suddenly, when I peeked at her sleeping face, I noticed traces of dried tears. It seemed she had cried herself to sleep alone.

I gently wiped the tear stains from the corners of her eyes with his fingers, and I turned my back to Shuri and closed my eyes.

──Mom. You say, “Leave Shuri to me,” but… what more do you want me to do?

Behind my heavy eyelids, the figure of my mother, whom I haven’t seen in five years, faintly emerges.

I can’t rely on anyone, and I can’t lean on anyone either. When it comes to this, I don’t even know who to cling to. My real father is still running away, and my mother isn’t even in this world anymore.

I can’t rely on anyone.

──I want to see Mom too…

Before falling asleep, I felt like my mother, deep in my consciousness, was smiling with a troubled expression.

The moment I thought that troubled face looked a bit like Miori’s──my consciousness faded away.