The Kansai Villain’s Rebirth: I Accidentally Ended Up With a Harem. - Chapter 100: Kansai Guy Sees the First Dream of the Year.

Kansai Guy Sees the First Dream of the Year.

So this was the first time I’d ever spoken face-to-face with my parents after reincarnating… and good lord, what a storm. Pure, undiluted, full-fat Osaka uncle-and-auntie energy. The kicker? Dad used to be a brooding handsome devil and Mom a stylish, leggy beauty. That mismatch makes it ten times worse. I can only pray Rinko’s parents survive the encounter…

The three of them suddenly decided it’d be better to spend the rest of the day with their own families and headed home early. Shi-chan was originally planning to stay for dinner, but apparently her mom is trying to be home as much as possible over winter break, so she went back to keep her company.

Left alone, I made another round of white-miso ozoni, threw together whatever was in the fridge that seemed to go with it, took a bath, and collapsed into bed. What a chaotic start to the new year… Still, I think I’ll get along just fine with Mom and Dad. But if they show up at that energy level every single time, my body won’t hold out. I’m supposed to be the straight man in this family, but with those two around, even I can’t keep up with the tsukkomi. Well, they don’t come home all that often, so… I’ll live.

“Ugh… I’m beat… How does a conversation alone wipe me out this bad?”

Muttering complaints, I closed my eyes.

***

When I opened them again, I was in a room that filled me with aching nostalgia. A bare-bones one-room apartment. The absolute minimum furniture. My corporate-slave-era den.

“No way…”

Was my life as Tennouji Daiki… over? This had to be a joke. Right when things were finally looking up with Shi-chan, Mio-chan, and Rinko? Screw that—no, screw that!! I bolted upright, grabbed the monitor in front of me, and tried to hurl it out the window. But it wouldn’t budge, like it was bolted down. Even the mouse wouldn’t lift. What the hell?

“No need to panic. This is the world of dreams.”

“…Huh?”

“At last we meet, Tennouji Daiki. Or perhaps I should call you… Salaryman A from Z?”

Salaryman A. The handle I used back when I posted on Z during my corporate slave days. Nekonome was my name on the forums. This guy knew me. Who was he? And why did his smug face piss me off so much?

“I am a god. I’ll overlook the insult about my face.”

“You can read my mind…? Then why bother talking out loud?”

“Because weaving words into conversation is more fun, no? Now, now, don’t glare like that. I’m the one who carried your soul into the very Netorare Harem world you so desperately wished for.”

“Oh! I remember that face now! You’re the damn chief producer of Netorare Harem!!”

“Correct. I thought that appearance would be easiest for you to recognize. That ending was, after all, the true end for the heroines~”

“Grit those teeth, bastard—I’m gonna punch you all the way from Umeda to Nishinomiya-Kitaguchi!”

“Even for a Kansai person, that’s an obscure threat… Assaulting a god is sacrilege! Calm down—it was a joke! A joke, I said!”

“No way. The one producer I swore I’d deck if I ever met him… Come flying all the way to Shinkaichi, you piece of—”

“BWAAAGH!?!?”

The self-proclaimed god rocketed through the ceiling with a cartoonish scream. Yep, definitely a dream. There’s no way the rotten producer of Netorare Harem would show up in my old apartment, and nobody flies off like a gag manga character after one punch. Still… damn, that felt good.

“That was cruel… punching a god. How barbaric.”

“Say one more word about your face and I’ll send you flying again.”

“Eek… Now, please calm down and listen.”

“Wipe your nosebleed first. It’s distracting. Though I guess I’m not blameless for causing it.”

He wiped the blood, stuffed tissues up his nostrils, and began, “Now then…” while looking utterly ridiculous. The tissues were really throwing me off…

“Pay it no mind. Now, Salaryman A—no, Tennouji-kun. First of all, congratulations on finally stepping into the long-awaited harem route with the heroines.”

“That route didn’t even exist in the damn game. What changed?”

“Because you created the smiles they never got to show in all the time you spent playing. You did it.”

“…Thanks, I guess. So why was I reincarnated as Tennouji Daiki specifically?”

“Your death was… unexpected. Well, with that diet and working ten days straight without sleep, you were bound to die eventually, but it happened sooner than projected.”

“Ten-day death march, man. Of course I died.”

“You were supposed to last another ten days…”

“Twenty-day death march!? And ten days off-schedule is what surprised you!?”

“Indeed… But as a god, I have never felt a wish as powerful as yours. A soul that unfortunate yet burning with such fierce longing—I simply had to save you. Thus, I performed an otherwise impossible isekai reincarnation.”

“Huh. Got it. But why Tennouji Daiki?”

“Because only with Tennouji Daiki present does tragedy occur. So I thought—if I put you inside Tennouji Daiki, the world might change. And it was a bullseye! You achieved your heart’s desire. How do you feel right now?”

“Well… can’t say it feels bad. I’m the Tennouji who prevented the NTR, after all. I used my original-game knowledge and moved heaven and earth for them. Did I inherit the original Tennouji’s brains and athletic ability too?”

“I wanted you to enjoy life as well, so consider it a service♪ A little bonus.”

Generous or stingy—I can’t tell. But thanks to that, I caught the heroines’ attention, raised their affection with my meta-knowledge, and successfully started dating all three…

“What about Imamiya? He’s supposed to be the protagonist of this world. Is it really okay to sideline him like this?”

“He became the necessary sacrifice. If I left the protagonist correction on him while you were here, you’d never stand a chance. The protagonist aura has transferred entirely to you. That’s why you shine, and that’s why they turned to you.”

“So even when I shielded Rinko and fell… that was the protagonist correction?”

“Precisely.”

“What a conveniently vague term! You can explain away literally anything with that!”

“You’re the one benefiting, so be grateful…”

Sure, I’m happy, but having my basketball skills and everything else chalked up to “protagonist power” leaves a sour taste.

“Your own monstrous obsession and effort are what brought you here. Be proud of that.”

“Well… there are parts I’m still not satisfied with, but fine, I’ll take it.”

“But as you already know, from here on out…”

“There’ll be guys trying to steal Shi-chan and the others, right?”

“Exactly. This is that kind of world. Succeed in defending them, and the future will be bright. Fail… and it’ll follow the game’s script.”

“…”

Of course. If I had to watch that garbage ending play out in real life, I’d probably hang myself. No way in hell I’ll let that happen. I’ve been fighting all this time, but… the real battle starts now. I wanted nothing more than to spend every day flirting with the three of them forever, but all I have to do is crush whatever enemies show up. No arrogance. No complacency. I will seize happiness with Shi-chan, Mio-chan, and Rinko. That’s the mission I was reincarnated into this world to fulfill.

“So who exactly is coming to steal them?”

“You’ll have to confirm that with your own eyes.”

“What kind of half-assed strategy guide is that!? Just tell me!!”

“If I told you everything, it wouldn’t be good for you, would it? Change fate with your own hands. Seize happiness with your own hands. And at the end, please enjoy a lovely, fluffy, lovey-dovey life with the heroines—gufufu.”

“Want me to send you flying again? This time from Yodoyabashi all the way to Demachiyanagi.”

“That’s another obscure one… Oh no, any more interference and the world will break. I’ll be cheering for you, so do your best!”

“What a useless, half-assed god! Hey, wait—let me punch you one more time, damn it!”

The world dissolved into pale purple mist and drifted away from the apartment. What the hell was that guy…!?

When I opened my eyes again, I was back in my bed at the Tennouji house—staring at the ceiling I’d grown used to over the past three months.

“I definitely had a dream… but man, what a infuriating one… Worst possible first dream of the year…”

Rubbing the faint headache between my brows, I started getting ready to head to Mio-chan’s place. I tried my hardest to remember… but nothing came back.