Surviving in a World Teeming with Monsters with the Useless Skill 【Everyday Items Master】! I Was Just Hunting Wild Animals with a Crowbar, So Why Is Everyone Screaming It's an S-Rank Monster? - 64

Chapter 64: Q&A Session with New Member, Luna-chan

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In the afternoon, after I’d ended up getting acquainted with those weirdos called the “Ferocious Shark Gang,” I came home to find Angel, who’d been watching the house, waiting for me.

“Oh! You’re just in time! Loser piggy! I’ll give you what you want, so stop whining already!”

Angel, dressed up despite being at home because she was streaming. She ran over to me shouting.

“Taku~!”

“What, what? What happened?”

“The loser piggies are being so noisy! I need your help for a bit!”

“What do you mean?”

As I asked, I moved over to the PC and peeked at the screen. The comment section suddenly exploded.

: Crowbar Bro!

: Crowbar Bro is finally here! We’ve been waiting for you since forever!

: It’s Crowbar Bro’s channel but there’s hardly any Crowbar Bro!
: Get Crowbar Bro on more often!

“This is my channel, damn it!”

Angel was clearly angry at the comments. But I more or less figured out what was going on.

“Ah… I see. I think I get it.”

It looked like since Angel had been running the stream by herself, the viewers—the loser piggies—had started complaining. I hadn’t really been helping with the streams lately… Sometimes I’d appear on the screen for a bit when we were out hunting, but we had plenty of food now. I could actually help her with the stream. 

: Hold a press conference about the secret love child, Crowbar Bro!

: Who’s that beautiful loli?!

:Introduce her—now!

And now I started seeing a few comments about Luna as well. Yeah, that made sense.

We’d let her do what she wanted during the stream as long as she didn’t get too loud. At first, we were careful not to have her interrupt with the stream, but whenever we appeared on camera, the response was really good.

So Luna’s existence had already been noticed by the audience for some time, and now it looked like they were rioting, demanding an explanation.

“Onii-sama, Angel, is something the matter?”

Luna came over to me and got caught on camera. The comment section sped up even more.

: Onii-sama!?
: She really is too cute!
: So adorable!
: Crowbar Bro—or rather, dear brother-in-law!

: Please let me have your little sister!

“The loser piggies sure are obedient to anyone but Angel.”

“So annoying.”

Even though Angel was just as much a beautiful girl as Luna, her taunt skill was probably working against her.

“Well, as you can see, no matter what I talk about during a casual stream, it ends up like this. So I was thinking it’s about time for both of you to make a proper appearance.”

At Angel’s summary, I nodded. 

“Got it. In that case, let’s see…”

: Don’t tell me, even Crowbar Bro doesn’t want to bring her out too?

: Loli! Loli! Loli! Loli! Loli!

: Crowbar Bro, get on the stream more!
: Crowbar Bro, do an endurance stream while you climb to the top rank on a FPS game in a new account!

“Anyway, putting the completely unrelated stuff aside, even if they’re asking me to introduce Luna, the truth is, there’s still a lot we don’t know about her.”

: What do you mean?
: Huh?
: The way you phrase it sounds kinda weird.

After thinking for a bit, I then said.

“Alright, then let’s do this. Luna’s learned a lot of new words recently, so I figured this would be a good time to interview her properly.”

Angel raised her voice with flair.

“Chiki-chiki! Who is this beautiful girl!? It’s the New Member Q&A Session~!”

: OOOOHHHHHH!
: It’s hereeeeeeee!
: UHHHYYYYYEEEAAAAAHH!

The comment section exploded at Angel’s announcement. And so, here was the setup. Angel, the host, sat at the far left; I, the interviewer, was at the far right; Luna, the interviewee, was in the center—sitting on Botan’s lap.

“Alright, so! Because the loser piggies were seriously, truly, absolutely unbearably noisy, we’ve reluctantly decided to introduce Luna while interviewing her about various things!”

: Shut up.
: Zakomiya-san, please be quiet
: Don’t interrupt the flow, Zakomiya
: Burn Zakomiya! Burn her!

“Shut up, loser piggies! I’m the one in charge of this event!”

As always, the usual pro-wrestling style banter between Angel and the loser piggies broke out. But Angel, a veteran of many battles, quickly switched gears and turned her scowl into a pleasant smile.

“Anyway! Let’s start with a self-introduction! Luna!”

“Ah, um, uh… M-my name is L-Lunarias Demonica Heart. My nickname is Luna! Nice to meet you…!”

Having just been briefed about how streaming worked, Luna was clearly nervous from being watched by so many people, but she managed to introduce herself properly.

: Cuuuuuuuute!
: So she’s Luna-chan.
: We’ve got a loli type in the Crowbar Bro family now.
: The whole screen is filled with beautiful girls.
: Burn Crowbar Bro, burn!
: Burn Zakomiya! Burn her!

The comments were in full frenzy. With so many beautiful girls on screen, both Angel and I were getting metaphorically burned on the stake. 

“Yep! That was our adorable new family member and beautiful girl, Luna~! Now, let’s ask her guardian, Taku-san, how she joined the family. Taku?”

Prompted by Angel, I began to explain.

“Right, I’m Taku. As for how Luna came to us… Do you guys remember when my day got auctioned off for one billion yen?”

: Oh yeah, everyone was worried about that.

: Who ended up winning that auction anyway?

“Well, it was won by this group with a name oddly similar to the Ministry of Defense—called the Boueishou (防衛省=Ministry of Defense= boueishou). As part of their request, I had to dive into a weak dungeon.”

: Ah, I see… Wait, what?

: Boueishou, huh… I wonder what kind of organization it is…. (blank stare)

: So the government won the bid, huh…

: A weak dungeon, huh… 

“The request was something like, ‘Retrieve the treasure from the dungeon.’ So I beat the boss, and who do I find inside? Luna.”

: Huh? Wait, what?

: A dungeon-born beauty?!

: Never heard of that before.

: There was a human inside the dungeon?

No one had ever heard of something like that before, and the chat erupted into chaos.

Come to think of it, I might’ve said a bit too much. Is it okay? I mean, confidentiality-wise?

I hadn’t even read the full email. I glanced over at Angel, who had read it—and saw her…

“……”

…dripping with sweat.

…Ah, this is bad!? Did I mess up!?

“…No, let’s calm down. The one who beat the Mountain God, something the government couldn’t handle, was Taku. This is not scary. The government’s not scary. If anything, this is just a precaution against their potential tyranny over Taku. Yes. This is fine. This is fineeeeeeeeeeee.”

Angel seemed to be giving herself a pep talk. Since Angel didn’t stop me, it should be fine, then? If it were really bad, Angel would definitely stop me. So I decided to just not worry about it for now.

“S-so yeah, that’s basically it. So actually, there’s still a lot we don’t know about Luna.”

: So that’s how it is, huh.
: What a rare discovery.
: This is gonna be a fun interview.

The comment section was full of interest in Luna. Luna tried to read them too, but she wasn’t used to the scrolling speed yet and got dizzy trying to follow it. That was when Angel smoothly brought things back on track.

“Okay! That was Luna’s backstory from guardian Taku~ Now from here on, Taku will be asking Luna some questions!”

“Alright. First, I’ll start with the list of questions we prepared. After that, we’ll go through the ones submitted by viewers.”

“I-I’ll do my best!”

Luna was nervous, but clearly fired up. Botan gently patted her head, smiling warmly. Yeah, she had gotten a lot better at communicating in just these past few days. She should be able to answer questions properly now. As I glanced down at the question sheet I’d prepared, I opened my mouth to begin.

“Alright. First question.”

“Yes!”

“Why were you inside the coffin in that dungeon?”

“…By dungeon, umm… You mean the annex, right?”

“Hm? I guess?”

I had never seen anyone actually refer to it as the “annex,” but considering that dungeon was essentially a Western-style mansion, it made sense, and I nodded in agreement.

Luna responded to that with the following sentence.

“I was sleeping in the coffin in the annex because I was ordered to by Mother.”

“…Mother?”

“Yes.”

Her mother. Of course she had one, but hearing it stated so plainly still brought a strange kind of surprise. But that explanation alone wasn’t enough for me, so I pressed further.

“You were ordered… What do you mean by that?”

“I don’t know the details. I was just told to sleep in the annex and wait for the right time.”

Wait for the right time, huh? “The right time.” I didn’t know what kind of opportunity she was waiting for, but Luna had been waiting for that moment, huh?

: What does that mean?
: Telling a child to “wait for the right time”?
: Just what was Luna’s Mama thinking about?
: Ummm…???

The comments section was full of suspicion. I took notes while feeling a vague sense of unease and moved on to the next question.

“Okay, next question. Luna, where were you originally from? Can you tell me about the surroundings or something?”

“Yes. Um, the place I was originally from was…”

Luna thought for a moment before continuing.

“…A castle. I lived in the Castle of Hearts.”

: The Castle of Hearts?
: Now she’s really sounding like a princess.
: Are you telling me Luna-chan was a princess?!

“Princess… Uuh, it’s a bit embarrassing, but maybe, I guess…? Mother was the queen, the most powerful person in the castle, and I was her daughter.”

: So she was a real princess!
: Castle of Hearts… Queen…
: Is this Alice in Wonderland or something?

Luna was now under strong suspicion of being a full-fledged princess, and the comment section was buzzing with excitement. Meanwhile, Botan, Angel, and I exchanged wary looks. The comments were taking it optimistically, but as the ones who had fought in that creepy dungeon, we felt differently.

A castle. A queen. An annex in the form of a dungeon. The bizarre and eerie enemies that infested that place. If that was her home, then what kind of princess was Luna?

“…What was the castle like?”

When I asked, Luna responded brightly.

“It was a very noisy place! Everyone was always singing and dancing and doing all sorts of weird things!”

As she recalled her homeland, Luna looked genuinely happy. I nodded a few times and dug a little deeper.

“What was your mother like?”

“She was a bit short-tempered and scary! When she got mad, all the servants would panic! But…”

After laughing at the memory, Luna spoke with a tinge of sadness.

“She was actually very kind, and I loved her very much… So, I want to see her again if I could.”

Her words brought me up short. I’d been blinded by the one billion reward, but this reminded me that Luna was just a little girl. She had a place she originally lived, a family.

Was it really right to just hand her over to the client without hesitation?

No, a request is a request and must be fulfilled, but still… Isn’t there something else we need to tell the client? If possible… Isn’t it the responsibility of an adult to return her to her family? After all, Luna is not like me, who wanted to get away from my family as soon as I could.

“I see.” 

“Yes!” 

I said with a smile and Luna responded cheerfully.

: Too cute…
: Crowbar Bro! Please, return her to her parents!
: We must protect… That smile…!

Everyone in the comment section was completely smitten by her charm. After that, I took a few more questions from the comments and asked Luna some lighthearted things. There were no more deep, probing questions—we wrapped up the stream in a friendly, relaxed mood.

That day, the only thing that lingered in my mind was that the retrieval agents still hadn’t shown up.

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