Surviving in a World Teeming with Monsters with the Useless Skill 【Everyday Items Master】! I Was Just Hunting Wild Animals with a Crowbar, So Why Is Everyone Screaming It's an S-Rank Monster? - 125

Chapter 125: A Palm-Sized Everyday Items Master

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This was right after I had been shrunk and rescued by Koufukuji and the others. First things first: I had to regain my combat strength, or nothing would move forward. When I explained how I’d lost my weapon and ended up being shrunk, Koufukuji said to me.

“I have a few ideas, but I think the best course is to find that ‘Duchess’ and redo the trial.”

“Huh!? That insane trial!?”

I looked up at Koufukuji in shock, and he explained.

“That’s the thing about concept-based skills. There’s always meaning behind those tedious procedures. In that absurd trial, the other side probably faced risks too, which is exactly why it had such a strong binding force. It’s one thing if all it did was ruin some household items, but forcibly shrinking a human is something that’s normally impossible to accomplish.”

That’s what Koufukuji said. I wasn’t fully convinced, but I nodded. 

“I see…Then yeah, that might work. I’ve got no leads on finding some food that makes you grow, like in ‘Alice.’ Besides, even after the tart thief trial, the tart is still with me, so I might be able to use that.”

The one holding the tart was subject to trial by the judge. That was a law laid down by the Queen of Hearts, so the effect would probably be immediate. If I handed the tart off to the Duchess again, the trial as a tart thief would begin anew. And if I could make her the real culprit during that, maybe I could be cleared of the false charges and have my punishment overturned.

“If that fails, we could always search for a growth cake or something, and while we’re at it, hit up the housewares floor of a department store—my combat strength would be restored in no time. Sounds worth a shot.”

When I said that, Sango gave me a wry smile.

“When you think about it calmly, the fact that you’re that powerful just by using household goods… it’s kind of cheating, y’know? Even if someone takes your weapon, you just need to pick up another random item and you’re back in business—way too convenient~!”

Sango poked my cheek. Since I was palm-sized now, it was more like she was pressing her fist into my face.

“Quit it.”

“Ahahaha~! Taku-san, you’re so cute~!”

“S-Sango-chan. Y-you probably shouldn’t tease him too much…”

“It’s fine, isn’t it~? Shizuku, you’re such a scaredy-cat~”

“B-but…”

From inside Koufukuji’s pocket, I observed the three of them. Koufukuji had a neutral stance toward me—very businesslike. Our conflict and reconciliation were both purely professional; I could see that he’d already compartmentalized it.

Sango had fought me twice today, and now there was a bit of a bond between us. Maybe she was using this casual tone to gloss over the awkwardness from the second fight. Shizuku, on the other hand, was completely terrified of me. Well, unlike the other two, she hadn’t even exchanged a few words with me. It couldn’t be helped.

We were having this conversation while the Ashura team took down the playing card soldiers that were targeting me. All three of them were seriously strong, and in a flash, they wiped out what must have been nearly a hundred card soldiers.

Koufukuji used his skill, 【Sudden Slash】, to slice through the last one. The final card soldier collapsed.

“Good.”

Koufukuji continued on.

“We’ve cleared the interference. Monobe, which way did the Duchess go?”

“That way, I think.”

“Got it. All units, advance northwest.”

““Roger~!””

The three of them started running. As expected from people with base physical abilities enhanced by skills—they were just a step below Botan in speed. I was impressed by their pace and muttered a question.

“Koufukuji, how old are you?”

“What’s with the sudden question?”

“Well, you seem composed and you’ve got a proper job… I was just curious.”

Thinking he might be older than me, I asked, and Koufukuji replied calmly.

“I’m twenty-five.”

“Ah, gah, ugh… T-two years younger than me…”

“What’s with that reaction?”

It kind of stings when the people you treat as equals turn out to be younger than you. Makes you feel like… Maybe something’s off with you. I’d prefer not to dwell on that. Is Rick the only one older than me? But Rick has that saintly air about him, so calling us equals feels off too.

I want to grow up. Be a proper adult. 

That thought made me go quiet inside Koufukuji’s pocket.

That was when the twins chimed in while running.

“By the way, I’m fifteen!”

“Um, I’m the same as Sango-chan.”

“So you’re about the same age as Botan. Compared to us, that’s pretty young.”

“Don’t compare us to the legendary ‘Monster’! Sure, we’re ranked adventurers, but when it comes to strength, she’s one of Japan’s absolute top, y’know!?”

“Ugh… Yeah, we may be small, but…But that’s just because the ‘Monster’-san is unusually mature… Or something…!”

Sango’s take was a little off, and Shizuku took unexpected emotional damage.After a brief pause, I said to Koufukuji.

“You’ve got it rough too, huh.”

“Probably not as rough as you, Monobe.”

Koufukuji shut that down cold. I wanted to interrogate him for a good hour on why he thought that. Then, Koufukuji added a detail.

“By the way, my sister is a year older than me—twenty-six. There’s a pretty big age gap between us and the twins.”

“Sister? …Oh, you mean the sniper.”

“Yeah. She’s currently under the control of the Offspring.”

Koufukuji’s tone had a probing quality to it. I responded.

“She’s probably with the Queen of Hearts. She didn’t dodge the initial beheading order.”

“I see. If we know where she is, it’s fine. We’re immortal anyway. Getting your head cut off isn’t going to end us.”

Koufukuji said it matter-of-factly. That was likely why my earlier claim that I’d ‘killed’ the twins carried weight—it meant I’d truly ended them. While we were talking, a building nearby collapsed.

“ONNGYAAAAAAHHHHHH!”

A deafening sound rang out, and I covered my ears. Even the Ashura trio grimaced at the sheer volume. They quickly put in earplugs, trying to dull the noise.

“Monobe! What is that!?”

“That’s it! That’s the Duchess! And the one crying is her baby!”

To not be drowned out by the baby’s cries, we had to shout back and forth. We moved toward the source. Among the card soldiers slathered in red paint, a large figure stood out.

Standing in our line of sight was a woman (?), about 1.25 heads tall, holding an enormous baby. Floating pepper shakers surrounded her, scattering pepper everywhere.

“Closing in.”

““Roger!””

At Koufukuji’s signal, the three quickly closed the distance to the Duchess. The Duchess noticed us, then spotted me in Koufukuji’s chest pocket.

“Oh my, you’ve come to return the tart, have you? Such a small thing, yet not to be underestimated.”

The pepper shakers vanished. The Duchess dropped the baby. The baby then transformed into a massive pig. The Duchess casually mounted the pig and slapped its rump.

“Bugeeeeeee!”

“But I won’t let it end that easily! Hiyah! My precious baby! Run with all your might!”

The pig bolted forward. And so, the game of tag between the Duchess and the Ashura team began.

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