My Popular-as-Hell Best Friend Is Annoying, So I Want to Get Him a Girlfriend and Shut Him Up - Chapter 222 & 223 & 224

Chapter 222: Summer Break, Rival 4

“Well, I’m quite satisfied…”

In front of me are two plastic containers.

One’s empty, but the other’s packed with a full serving of frappe.

To think I get to savor such a delicious drink again—God must be watching my daily deeds.

I’ll give you a pat on the back.

“Alright, time to head home.”

““Hold it (Please wait)!””

As I stood up with the container, the two girls in front of me stopped me.

They’re giving me pretty intense looks—what’s up?

Today’s supposed to be the anniversary of my frappe rendezvous, so our business should be done.

“What’s wrong?”

“Huh, waiting for a quip? I didn’t expect you to sound so confused.”

“Senpai, we haven’t dealt with our business yet.”

“Oh!”

I got so caught up with the frappe I forgot why I came here.

Right, I’m here to listen to their problems, aren’t I?

“For starters, I haven’t even heard why this shrimp is here.”

“Exactly! Why’s my rival, Natori-senpai, here!?”

Looks like neither of them can accept the other’s presence.

If they see each other as romantic rivals, they probably don’t want to share their exclusive info.

“Rivals, huh…”

“What? It’s not a weird thing to say, is it?”

I get where they’re coming from, but the issue is whether they’re even on that playing field.

“Let me ask first—are you both saying your dates flopped?”

““Ugh.””

Leaning on my hand, I asked, and both Mayoi and Rando-dono let out awkward sounds.

“To put it further, you didn’t get any traction, right?”

““…Yes.””

They nodded with faces like they’d bitten a sour bug, clearly reluctant to admit it.

Sadly, this means the whole rival thing is beside the point.

“You’re in no position to talk about rivals. First, share your info to find clues to crack Uryu, or at least avoid repeating the same mistakes. Am I wrong?”

“…”

“…That might be true.”

Mayoi stayed silent, sulking, but Rando-dono spoke up after a moment.

“Before worrying about Natori-senpai, we need to deal with the root issue—Aoyagi-senpai, right?”

“Exactly. You can clash after that.”

Personally, I don’t care who ends up with Uryu.

The problem is time dragging on without Uryu catching feelings.

I don’t mind them fighting, but they need to make progress with Uryu first, or it’s all talk.

“…I see. I thought you just didn’t want the hassle of meeting us separately, Hirose.”

“…No way that’s it.”

“Huh? Was there a pause?”

“Just your imagination, Rando-dono. Want a frappe?”

“No, that’s for you, Hirose-senpai.”

“Oh, right, right~.”

“Isn’t this guy obviously flustered?”

“Hard to tell. Senpai’s always a bit off.”

“True.”

Close call—I almost let my true motives slip.

Thanks to my flawless acting, I dodged it, but these girls aiming for Uryu are sharp.

I need to stay on my toes.

“You get the goal, right? Take turns talking, learn from each other’s failures, think of new approaches. Assume Uryu’s out of reach no matter what you do.”

Truth is, I can’t offer much advice myself.

After all, every girl who’s come to me for help hasn’t ended up with Uryu.

“So, who’s going first?”

At that, they both widened their eyes for a second, then looked at each other.

They gave complicated smiles.

“Natori-senpai can go first. She got here before me.”

“What’re you saying? I’m the senior here. Juniors go first, obviously.”

“No, no, juniors learn by watching their seniors. Let me study your conversational skills, senpai.”

“Nope, nope. Juniors pave the way so seniors don’t embarrass themselves. You can afford to mess up, so you should go first.”

Their sudden display of deference was starting to tick me off.

I get they’re reluctant to share their failures, but they’ll both have to talk eventually.

Whether it’s first or last, it’s the same—so stop wasting time.

“Rock-paper-scissors. Winner goes first. That work?”

Cutting off their escape to keep things moving, they both quietly stared at their right hands.

…What’s with this tension, like winning rock-paper-scissors means the end of their lives?

It’s just talking about their dates with Uryu.

They were planning to tell me anyway, right?

Does having a rival here really make them that hesitant?

“Hirose, I’ve got one suggestion.”

“I’ve got one too.”

Both gave me super serious looks, so I couldn’t brush them off casually and dropped my hand from my cheek.

“…What?”

Mayoi, keeping her expression steady, held up her right hand to show ‘three.’

“Can we make it best of three?”

That was the most pointless suggestion ever.

I almost want to applaud her for pulling such a serious face just for that.

Scratch that—don’t ask me stuff like that.

“What about you, Rando-dono?”

I accepted Mayoi’s suggestion and turned to Rando-dono.

I’d like to think she’d have something more sensible, but she’s no stranger to sudden airheadedness.

God, please let it be the former!

“For this match, can the loser go first?”

Please, just do whatever.

Chapter 223: Summer Break, Rival 5

“I won!”

“Ugh…!”

As the farce wrapped up for me, Rando-dono raised both hands in joy, while Mayoi groaned, staring at her fist.

They’re expressing their emotions so dramatically, but all we did was decide who’d talk about their Uryu date first.

“Come on, spill it already.”

“…Fine.”

Mayoi let out a big sigh but finally gave in, straightening her posture and clearing her throat lightly.

“Well, about a week ago, I contacted Aoyagi, and we went out together yesterday.”

“Where’d you go?”

“The pool.”

“The pool!?”

The one who shouted in surprise was Rando-dono, sitting next to Mayoi.

“Jeez, don’t yell so loud right next to me.”

“The p-p-pool, like, that pool!?”

“I don’t know which pool you mean, but a pool’s a pool, right?”

“B-but the pool…!”

Mayoi responded calmly, while Rando-dono flailed her hands, her cheeks turning red.

I kinda get why she’s freaking out.

As far as I know, this was Mayoi and Uryu’s first date, and choosing the pool for their first outing caught me off guard.

Not that there’s anything wrong with going to a pool, but it doesn’t feel like a typical choice.

Whether my thinking’s typical is another question.

“Well, it’s definitely a spot a shrimp like you could never pick.”

“What!? That’s not true! If I were pushed to the edge of a cliff and had to hype myself up, I could probably choose it by, like, the tenth date!”

“That’s what you say with all that gusto? As a fellow girl, that’s just sad.”

“Ugh…”

Under Mayoi’s pitying gaze, Rando-dono clutched her chest and shrank back.

I see, so that’s why Rando-dono’s acting timid.

Sure, probably only Haruka at Yourei High could rival Mayoi’s proportions.

But whether you’re confident or not, baring your figure to someone you like must take some guts.

That said, whether Uryu’s into curvy figures is a different matter.

His sister, who he’s wary of, and his younger sister, who he can’t stand up to, both have feminine proportions, so he might not be into that type due to those dynamics.

I’ve never cared about a girl’s chest size myself.

Everyone’s different, and that variety is what makes them charming.

The ones who express themselves well within their own style are the best, so in that sense, Mayoi made a solid choice.

That’s how it is—girls aren’t about chest size, and guys aren’t about height.

Yeah, guys aren’t about height.

If you get that, I’ve got no complaints.

“We’re getting off track. So, I made plans with Aoyagi, and we went to the pool yesterday.”

“Did Uryu just agree like it was nothing?”

“Yeah. I mentioned the pool, and he didn’t seem fazed at all. I kinda wished he’d been a bit more flustered.”

“That’s a tough one.”

I don’t think Uryu never gets flustered.

He’s clearly thrown off by Rando-dono’s advances, and sudden moves should rattle him too.

So maybe he expected Mayoi to suggest a place like the pool or the beach.

If you know it’s coming, there’s no reason to be surprised.

Like with my world heritage quiz, that guy’s still terrifying.

“So I figured I had to make up for it on the day. For that week leading up, I was dead serious about everything—my outfit, my swimsuit, all of it. I believed Aoyagi would blush at my charm when we met.”

Saying that, Mayoi suddenly started fiddling with her phone.

After a few seconds, she turned the screen toward me.

“What do you think? Pretty good, right?”

It was a selfie of Mayoi, likely taken in the pool’s changing room.

She’s making a peace sign near her eyes with a confident smirk.

Leaning slightly to emphasize her chest, her jet-black bikini radiated presence.

If the 2-A guys saw this, they’d probably faint.

“W-Wait, let me see too!”

Curious, Rando-dono snatched the phone from Mayoi to look.

Her face paled.

She’s probably despairing over the gap in their figures, but Rando-dono’s charm lies elsewhere, so she shouldn’t worry.

“So, Hirose, what’s your take?”

“Splendid. It’s a perfect shot that shows you know yourself inside and out.”

When I gave my honest opinion, Mayoi crossed her arms, her lips curling in satisfaction.

That gesture emphasized her chest even more—does she do this unconsciously?

It’s a bit much for teenage boys.

“So, did you have Uryu swooning?”

I regretted asking almost instantly, and as expected, Mayoi’s expression flipped 180 degrees.

No surprise it darkened—this is a debrief, after all.

“Well, I was pretty confident, you know. So I kept myself covered with a towel until the last second, planning to boldly reveal everything once I met up with Aoyagi.”

“What, he didn’t react well?”

That’s gotta be the conclusion.

Even during the study group, she was frustrated by Uryu’s lack of reaction, so she probably felt defeated by his usual indifference.

“No, that’s not it.”

Unexpectedly, my guess was off.

I was so sure, I couldn’t think of another answer.

What made Mayoi feel the date was a failure?

“Well, um…”

As I waited for her words, a strained voice slipped out.

Her face, unusually flushed, was covered by her hands as if to hide it.

Raising her girlish charm to adorable levels, Mayoi’s words were:

“Aoyagi’s body… it was incredible!”

““…Huh?””

She completely froze me and Rando-dono’s thoughts in an instant.

Chapter 224: Summer Break, Rival 6

“His body, you mean Uryu’s?”

“Obviously, who else would it be?”

Seeing Mayoi still blushing with embarrassment, my mind spun in confusion.

They went to a pool, so naturally, Uryu was in swimwear, upper body bare.

Sure, the guy’s a prime example of lean muscle with zero fat, but I didn’t think there’d be girls getting excited over it.

Or maybe it’s like how guys get worked up over a girl’s figure?

Still, Rando-dono’s reaction seems lukewarm, so I’m not sure what’s right.

The only fact clear now is that Mayoi was thrilled by Uryu’s physique.

“You into muscles or something?”

“I didn’t think I was, but the moment I saw it up close, I was overwhelmed. Like, I was shown the pinnacle of masculinity or something.”

“Exaggerated… but not wrong.”

Looks aside, he’s got killer athletic skills and a brain that works at lightning speed.

Mayoi’s over-the-top phrasing isn’t off—at least no one at Yourei High would disagree.

“But even though I was totally thrown off by that, you know what he said first when we met up!?”

“No clue.”

“Don’t just say that—think about it!”

“Ugh…”

I don’t get it, but she’s super pissed at me.

Somehow, a quiz got started, but this doesn’t need thinking.

It’s Uryu—he’d just compliment her and be done.

“Something like, ‘Your swimsuit looks good on you’?”

“You think I’d quiz you over something that generic? Are you an idiot, Hirose?”

Whaaat!?

Calling me an idiot when I’m playing along with her quiz!?

She dared call me an idiot!?

I was just mimicking Uryu a bit, and she throws my effort back in my face!

“Fine, I’ll do a perfect impression, so watch.”

With that, Mayoi cleared her throat, straightened her face, and looked at me.

“‘Yup, just as I thought. Black suits you, Natori-san.’”

“…”

“How’s that!? Getting told that with a smile—isn’t it just too much!? With Aoyagi Uryu’s smile!?”

Mayoi was practically snorting with excitement.

…It’s more normal than I expected, but maybe it hits harder than just “it suits you”?

This time, though, even Rando-dono was listening with a hint of envy.

Guess it feels good to know someone gets you—makes sense, I can see that.

“But because of that, I couldn’t focus on the pool at all, and I barely made any moves during our date. It was fun, sure, but…”

Mayoi had been talking enthusiastically, but she ended up face-down on the table, muttering regret.

From her perspective, she thought she’d set the stage, only for Uryu to steal the show.

It’s a defeat similar to the study group.

“And what went wrong?”

Then came the sudden curveball.

Without hearing much about the date itself, she’s asking me for advice.

The biggest thing that went wrong is definitely her attitude.

“No, dig into the date details more.”

“I don’t really remember much. We went around, had fun, that’s the vibe.”

“…And? What do you want me to do?”

“Tell me how to improve.”

“Are you dumb or just stupid?”

Unleashing my patience, I dropped a solid chop right on Mayoi’s head.

It landed pretty well.

“Ow! What’s with you all of a sudden!?”

“Shut up! Is that how you ask someone for help!?”

“Huh!? I treated you to a frappe, so it’s not a request—it’s your duty!”

“Then give me more specific details! Even a psych test asks for more info!”

“Don’t be ridiculous! My swimsuit look is worth way more than a psych test!”

“We already said thanks for the swimsuit view!”

“WHO SAID YOU COULD SATE YOURSELF WITH THAT?! Did you even say ‘itadakimasu’ properly!?” (T/N: Itadakimasu – Looking forward to the feast.)

“What the heck are we even talking about!?”

We were heating up so much we probably drew eyes, until Rando-dono stepped in.

“Don’t stop me, Rando-dono. She’s totally underestimating a guy’s three basic desires. By the time you say ‘itadakimasu,’ I’m already saying ‘gochisousama’!” (T/N: Gochisousama – Thank you for the feast.)

“You’ve got some nerve talking down to me when you’re treating people like your main course.”

“Sorry, but I don’t have that kind of appetite.”

“Hmph, just the weak-willed thinking I’d expect from how you look.”

“We’re talking about the date! The date, right!?”

““The date?””

When Mayoi and I echoed back, Rando-dono clutched her head like she was making an example of us.

What’s wrong? She looks like she’s in pain.

“…Forget it. If Natori-senpai’s done, I’ll talk.”

Letting out a huge sigh, Rando-dono slapped both her cheeks hard.

Muttering “Alright” under her breath, she looked at me seriously.

“So, can you listen to my story?”

“Hold on a sec.”

But just as she was about to start, Mayoi cut in.

“I haven’t gotten my advice yet…”

“Senpai! Be quiet! For a bit!”

“Oh, uh, okay…”

Intimidated by the mysterious pressure from Rando-dono’s smile, Mayoi backed off instantly.

Wait, where’d Mayoi’s story even go?

Oh well, I’ll listen to Rando-dono and give them both feedback together.

That might lead to better advice.

“So, um, like Natori-senpai, I invited him about a week ago. I was nervous he’d turn me down, but he agreed super easily.”

“He doesn’t say no as much as you’d think.”

Maybe because he sees them as friends, Uryu accepted both Mayoi and Rando-dono’s invites.

With all the date offers he must get, him not refusing means they’re at least not losing to other girls, right?

“Where’d you pick?”

“I actually agonized over it a lot. Like going to a movie, or a pro basketball game. An amusement park was tempting, but I worried long wait times might bore Aoyagi-senpai.”

Watching Rando-dono’s expressions shift, I could tell how seriously she’d thought about the location.

Her strength is her bold approach that even flusters Uryu, but she knows that alone isn’t enough.

That’s a good sign, isn’t it?

“So in the end, I invited him to an aquarium.”

“Nice, nice.”

Personally, I nodded approvingly at her choice.

It’s a great way to beat the summer heat, and Uryu, who’s got a nerdy side for animals, probably wouldn’t mind.

…Wait, is she about to say she messed up from here?