My Popular-as-Hell Best Friend Is Annoying, So I Want to Get Him a Girlfriend and Shut Him Up - Chapter 112 & 113 & 114

Chapter 112: Introduction

How did it come to this?

I clutch my head inside the swaying minibus.

Sure, I was the one who took the lead. 

I owed Misono Izumo a favor, and around that time, I got requests from multiple people to study. 

So, I figured I’d rope in Uryuu and execute a plan to get him a girlfriend at the same time—that’s all I intended when I came up with this idea.

Once it was set in motion, I planned to quietly slip away.

※

So—how did it come to this?

“Yay! I’m out!”

“Haruka-chan, you didn’t say ‘Uno’!”

“Ehh!? No way, that’s a lie, right!?”

“You didn’t say it. Haruka, draw two cards.”

“That’s harsh! Nobody told me…!”

“Why would we? You’re not that dumb, are you?”

“Muu! I’m definitely not losing to Mayo-nee!!”

“Don’t call me Mayo-nee!!”

Feeling the total lack of a study-focused vibe, I let out a heavy sigh.

Thinking Dad was in on this makes me a little sad.

And so, the story goes back about five days.

Chapter 113: Tsuyu Countermeasure Meeting

Mid-June, with the rainy season still in full swing.

Having just wrapped up an unexpectedly chaotic sports festival, our class shifts focus to preparing for final exams.

But for me, Hirose Yukiya, an even bigger surprise hits, leaving me no time for that.

“Hey, Uryu, snap out of it. Strategy meeting time.”

“Right, sure. Wait, what? Strategy meeting?”

It seems Uryu wasn’t expecting this either, still a bit dazed, but I quickly pull him back to reality. We’ve got about eight minutes until morning homeroom—time’s tight.

“The Tsuyu Countermeasure Strategy Meeting, obviously. You heard what just happened, right?”

“…Yeah.”

Just a few minutes ago, I got confessed to by Aoyagi Tsuyu, the little sister of the guy sitting in front of me, Aoyagi Uryu, who’d probably pop up on the first page if you googled “hot guy.”

She used to see me as a sort of second big brother, but after I helped her with her school transfer issues, romantic feelings apparently sparked. I thought it was just a midnight-high misunderstanding, but her feelings seem genuine.

I’m not sure if telling her actual brother about this is the right move, but when it comes to romance, Uryu’s the guy. If not him, who else can I turn to?

“So, Uryu, what do I do?”

“A strategy meeting that’s just you dumping it on me, huh?”

Uryu’s already throwing shade. What’s with that lazy attitude?

“Can’t help it. I don’t know the first thing about love. My parents are clueless about it too.”

“Come on, your parents can’t be that clueless.”

“Don’t underestimate them. Apparently, they were together as lovers for a grand total of zero days.”

“What does that even mean…?”

Uryu’s shock is understandable, but it’s the truth. According to my grandparents, my parents were childhood friends for so long they just started living together as is. It wasn’t until my grandparents asked, “When are you getting married?” that they finally tied the knot. They never saw it as dating—just being together, plain and simple.

“Whatever, forget my parents. This is about me. Give me advice.”

“Advice? What am I supposed to say?”

“What do you do in these situations?”

“Do? Nothing. I just turn them down.”

“What’s that? No internal struggle or anything?”

“Nope. If I don’t want to date them, I say no, and that’s it.”

That was a surprisingly cold, low tone from Uryu.

“So I’m asking, do you want to date Tsuyu?”

His question makes me pause for a second.

“That’s why I’m asking you. I told you, I don’t know the first thing about love. I don’t even know if I want to date her.”

“You’re a real piece of work, huh? If that’s the case, just turn her down.”

“She did say I don’t have to answer right away.”

“Then let it sit until you figure out what you want. Tsuyu wouldn’t delay your answer if she thought you’d jump at the chance to date her.”

“Is that how you’ve always handled it?”

“Kinda different. I usually reject them on the spot and move on. If someone keeps pursuing me after that, I might start thinking about them. I’m trying to be open-minded, but they might feel like I’m brushing them off.”

“…”

“What? If you’ve got something to say, spit it out.”

As I’m mulling things over, Uryu prompts me.

I’m not sure if I should say it, but I reply anyway.

“…Is that really okay?”

Uryu looks puzzled, so I keep going.

“You’re used to this, so you’ve got it down, but I’m honestly uneasy. Wouldn’t facing it head-on resolve things faster? Whether my answer ends up being positive or not.”

I don’t get my own love life, but I’ve seen plenty of Uryu’s. Every girl was serious, putting in real effort. The way they tried so hard to get his attention—it’s not something you just brush off. At least, that’s how I see it.

Surprised by my response, Uryu blinks a few times before smirking. I don’t know what’s so amusing, but it’s kinda annoying.

“…You’re really serious, huh?”

“Serious? It’s just normal.”

“If that’s normal, then I’m failing at it.”

“With how many girls chase you, we’re not exactly comparable.”

“It’s about mindset. Some guys can handle a ton of people and still be considerate. I don’t bother, so I don’t. That’s how it is.”

I wouldn’t say Uryu’s inconsiderate, but if he says so, maybe that’s his take. Still, if being earnest isn’t the only way, I’d like at least one other method.

“Anyway, talk to Tsuyu a lot. That’s how you’ll find a solution, whether you date or not.”

Uryu’s advice is, surprisingly, to talk it out with the confessor herself. Fine, but what’s a “solution” besides dating? For Tsuyu, it feels like anything else wouldn’t cut it.

“Thing is, I don’t see Tsuyu that often.”

“If someone who confessed doesn’t make an effort to see you more, just ignore them. They’re probably not that serious.”

“I-Is that how it works?”

“Well, with Tsuyu, that’s not gonna happen, so brace yourself.”

What’s with this guy, suddenly dropping scary hints? No way the refined, lovely Tsuyu-chan would do anything terrifying. Probably. Maybe.

“Just to be sure, you don’t have any issue with me dating Tsuyu?”

“Not really. I don’t have a say in who Tsuyu picks. Plus, I don’t wanna get chewed out by her for meddling.”

Yup, that second part’s definitely his real reason. As expected from the female-dominated Aoyagi household—Uryu’s still got it rough.

While we’re talking, Hasegawa-sensei walks into the classroom. Sadly, the Tsuyu Countermeasure Meeting ends here.

“Just so you know, I’m not gonna sit on this. I’ll work to find an answer as fast as I can.”

“If that’s what you want, that’s probably best. In the end, it’s your decision that matters most.”

“And you’ve been cutting through it all like a samurai. That’s kinda wild.”

“No one I’ve met has made me want to date them, so what can I do? I’m not compromising—I’m going all out for my own happiness.”

Oh wow, this guy’s kinda cool.

Chapter 114: Final Exam Prep Period

“Morning, folks. Homeroom’s starting now.”

Wearing his trademark white lab coat, Hasegawa-sensei scratches his head and speaks in a tone dripping with reluctance. 

His lack of enthusiasm is painfully obvious, and I can’t help but wonder if it’s really okay for this guy to be our homeroom teacher. 

It’s something I’ve been questioning since last year.

“First off, great job at the sports festival. Especially the boys—congratulations on the win. Not like I can relate if it’s a big deal or not, but don’t they give prize money or something to the winning class?”

How would I know? 

And why doesn’t he know that as a teacher? 

Even if there was prize money, I bet the whole class would band together to make sure he doesn’t get a single yen.

“…Sensei?”

“Oh, come on, Misono, it was obviously a joke. So don’t get mad, please.”

Exposed to Misono Izumo’s piercing glare, Sensei retracts his words almost instantly. 

This guy seriously has zero teacherly dignity. 

You’d think he’d avoid apologizing to a student so politely for appearances’ sake, but after nearly a year of scenes like this, I’m used to it. 

Habituation is terrifying.

“Ahem, moving on. The sports festival’s done, so starting today, we’re in the final exam prep period. From next Tuesday, you’ll have four days of tests across ten subjects. It’s tough as always, but do your best. Clubs are on break, so make good use of your time. I can help with physics, chemistry, or math if you’ve got questions, so feel free to ask.”

Yourei High’s final exams cover ten subjects: Japanese, two types of math, English, physics, chemistry, geography, health and physical education, home economics, and either art or music. 

This applies only to the science-track classes—A, B, and C. 

The humanities classes take world history, Japanese history, or biology instead. 

Some science students seem to want to switch from physics to biology, but for now, this is the setup.

“And don’t neglect the three subjects that aren’t entrance-exam-related. We’ve got a beast in our class who’s aced health and phys ed multiple times, so take a page out of their book. Seriously.”

“Hahaha, Uryu, he’s talking about you.”

“No way, it’s obviously you.”

“What…?”

I’m not convinced. Sure, I’ve gotten perfect scores in health and phys ed for all three final exams since first year.

But last year, in the second and third terms, Uryu also aced health and phys ed. 

So there’s no guarantee Sensei’s pointing at me.

 Damn that teacher, being all vague like that. 

Now the truth is shrouded in mystery.

“By the way, Hirose, I was talking about you. Study more evenly, would you?”

The truth has come to light, but I’d rather it stayed buried.

Still, my being the scapegoat brings some laughter to Class B. 

With the gloomy final exam period looming, I’ve sacrificed myself to keep the class from sinking into negativity. 

An honorable sacrifice? 

Yeah, not exactly thrilling.

“That’s about it. This week’s lessons are also part of the exam scope, so pay attention. That’s all.”

With a massive yawn, Hasegawa-sensei leaves the classroom. 

There’s still time left in homeroom, but apparently, he’s got nothing else to say.

“Yukiya, what’re you studying for the finals?”

Uryu, sitting next to me, tosses out the question.

“Stupid question. Health and phys ed, obviously.”

My dad’s never nagged me to study. 

He thinks I should do what I want.

But he did say that if I slack off too much, I’ll fall behind when I finally want to study. 

So to keep my study habits sharp, he told me to focus on at least one subject. 

That’s why, for midterms and finals, I narrow it down to one. 

Midterms, I go for physics or chemistry. 

Finals, it’s always been health and phys ed.

“Don’t you ever get swept away by art or something?”

“Sure, surrealism’s moved me plenty of times, but art’s just a byproduct of daily life. It can’t hold a candle to the allure of health.”

“To not see how art intertwines with everyday life… you’ve fallen far, Yukiya.”

“Shut up. I’m not dismissing art. It’s just lower priority compared to health and phys ed.”

“Oh? Then who’s your favorite surrealist artist?”

“Dali, no question.”

“Solid choice. Favorite work?”

“Dali When He Thought He Was a Girl Lifting the Skin of the Water to See the Dog Sleeping in the Shade of the Sea. The image of a girl lifting the sea like it’s skin is peak surrealism.”

“Not The Persistence of Memory? I like that one too. But it’s Dali at the Age of Six When He Thought He Was a Girl Lifting the Skin of the Water to See the Dog Sleeping in the Shade of the Sea. You missed the ‘six-year-old’ part.”

“Huh!? The title’s the one I said! Obsessing over ‘six years old’—what are you, a lolicon!?”

“There’s a phrase in the English title, ‘age of six.’ Don’t sweat it, Yukiya-kun. With art so low on your priority list, it’s no surprise you didn’t know. There, there.”

Ugh, so annoying. 

Just because he’s studied a bit of art, he’s gotta show off. 

Like with that ant thing before—why’s his knowledge always so niche? 

Has studying too much driven him nuts? 

I’m telling you, whether it’s six years old or not isn’t coming up on any exam. 

The Japanese translation of a title depends on the translator’s whim, and besides, Dali wasn’t six, nor was he a girl.

“Hm? What’s wrong with home economics, then? It’s about clothing and food—key parts of daily life.”

“Studying home ec is pointless. I’ve got Dad.”

“…What’s that supposed to mean?”

Hmph, I don’t need to explain it to you. 

I don’t need to learn home ec at school when Dad’s teachings are way more useful. 

You wouldn’t get it, Uryu, since you don’t appreciate my dad.

※

“Hirose Yukiya.”

Just as I’m about to convince Uryu that health and phys ed are the most worthy subjects, our class rep, Misono Izumo, calls out to me with an awkward tone.