Jobless Man’s Zombie Survival Life - Chapter 16: Home Renovation

Chapter 16: Home Renovation

Two days after smartly (by my standards) dealing with those idiots on the way back from the shelter.

“We loved our country, and we just wanted it to love us back!”

What a line…

I was enjoying the portable player from the electronics store.

Top-of-the-line, so the sound and visuals are crisp!

…Or so it feels.

Logically, it’s the disc, but whatever.

I’m watching that one where a badass Vietnam vet goes wild in the mountains, Vietnam, or Afghanistan.

Part 2, by the way.

I like 1’s story better, but 2’s action is where it’s at… 4’s pretty brutal too, and I kinda dig it.

That lead actor still looks way too cool.

Back in school, I was obsessed—trained like crazy, even chugged raw eggs.

Got sick as hell, so I only did that once.

Man, those bomb-tipped arrows are dope.

No clue how to make ‘em.

That huge survival knife is cool too.

Maybe I’ll look for one.

Could it replace a wakizashi?

Had my fill.

Ended up watching that sequel where a jacked cyborg from the future wreaks havoc.

Yup, muscles are power…

Wanted to watch that one where a revived robot cop shines, but I’d never stop, so I held off.

This thing’s battery lasts forever—great score.

…Borrow? Find? Whatever.

Time to get to work.

Been planning some home upgrades.

I’m using the second floor for entry.

The first floor’s locked from inside, but that’s not enough.

If a zombie horde hits, the front door might hold, but the shuttered windows worry me.

So, I’m boarding up the windows from the inside.

Got the boards from the North District home center yesterday.

Must’ve been swarmed after Ishikawa-san and those punks.

Generators and flashlights were gone, but boards and tools were untouched.

Light truck for the win!

Left small ventilation windows and sealed the rest.

It’s loud, but no zombies nearby, so I’m going all out.

Better to finish fast than tiptoe around.

If they come, I’ll deal with ‘em.

They’re noisy when active, so I’d know.

Finished inside, now the outside.

Worked quick, keeping an eye out.

No neighbors have come back.

Not even Sakashita-san’s wife.

I owe Yukiko-chan big time for her dad, so I need to check on her mom in the next town.

Fortifications done.

Zombies won’t break through easily.

My family would freak if they saw this.

…Hope they’re okay.

Next, “human-proofing.”

The house is surrounded by a block wall.

There’s a main gate by the garage and front door, plus a smaller back gate.

Zombies are dumber than animals.

They can’t climb the wall unless they overwhelm with numbers.

Just corpses driven by reflex and hunger.

Still, a bite’s game over, so no slacking.

But humans like those blond punks?

Weaker than zombies but smarter.

…Smarter than zombies, dumber than dogs?

They’ve got bad ideas, though.

They’d see my fortified house and think:

“Locked up this tight? Gotta be good stuff inside, heh heh.”

Some idiot would think that.

No, they will. Guaranteed.

My dad’s fancy car, even unused, is pricey.

Stores are stocked now, but they’ll run dry.

I’m planning self-sufficiency, but those idiots will steal.

It’s quicker, easier, and they don’t care about victims.

Those types exist in normal times.

In this mess, they’re bolder.

No way I’m letting them take my stuff!

So, I’m placing boards with nails driven through them, points up, on the wall.

Made ‘em yesterday.

Used random nail sizes on purpose.

Didn’t cover the whole wall—just spotty, amateur-looking gaps.

Just wide enough for someone to climb.

Then, on the ground below, I placed more nail boards.

They jump down, thinking it’s safe, and stab!

Nasty setup, if I do say so.

My trap-heavy mansion game skills paid off.

…By the way, bear traps are illegal now.

Didn’t know—wasted an hour looking.

Found out from Dad’s outdoor book at home. Felt dumb.

This house screams “psycho lives here.”

Haha! I’m pumped!!

Next, the gates.

Sealed the back gate with boards, wired the handle shut.

Nail traps on top.

The front gate’s my main exit, so I can’t lock it down.

Car’s gotta go through.

Lined the gateposts with nail traps.

It’s a pull-to-open gate, so I added a heavy-duty lock from the home center.

I’ll lock it tight when I leave.

Gotta keep the key safe.

Heard thieves hate time-consuming jobs.

Makes sense—homeowner could show up.

This setup should make them give up.

Hopefully.

Not bad for a rush job.

I’ll fix issues as they come and keep upgrading.

Maybe take a page from that Vietnam vet and set brutal booby traps!

…Too many, and I might forget and die pathetically.

Gotta keep it moderate.

Work’s done!!

Time for a cold shower, a smoke, and a movie!!

Robot cop or gun-slinging cleric… tough choice.