I, Who Was Dismissed as Worthless Failure by my Family and Fiancée, Discovered I had Reincarnated as a Game Character I Raised with Great Care and Vowed to Take Control of my Life and Defy Anyone who Opposes Me. - Chapter 126: I Hate What I Hate

Chapter 126: I Hate What I Hate

To be honest, I don’t want to accept donations from Prevost, but the fact remains that with that money, we can save numerous orphans—hundreds of them. When I consider this, I can’t be selfish and abandon all those children just because I refuse to accept it.

If I think about the hundreds of orphans, enduring this discomfort might be a small price if it means saving them.

Moreover, I don’t believe I’m worth even half of the donation Prevost gives every time. Because of this perception, I find it even harder to refuse his donations. Lately, he has been touching me inappropriately, getting closer to sensitive areas like my thighs, and I feel like it’s only a matter of time before Prevost starts demanding my body.

When faced with the choice between rejecting Prevost’s donations and abandoning the orphans or accepting his advances, I would probably choose the latter. Furthermore, I doubt the priests and the head of the church would condone me turning down Prevost’s requests.

I know Prevost has been bribing not only me but also those higher in rank, including the priests. 

Although I, and others, believe they should serve God, they are still human, and perhaps it’s only human to yield to such temptations.

Additionally, I must remember that I was saved and raised by the priests, and now may be the time for me to repay that debt.

I, too, am just a woman before being a Saint. There have been times when I dreamt about being in love with someone, just like any other woman. But in this world, a considerable number of children die before reaching the age of ten.

When I think about it, I realize how much more fortunate I am compared to those children who never got the chance to dream. I have shelter from the rain, three meals a day, supportive colleagues, caring nuns and priests who act as parents, and even the head of the church.

Allowing Prevost to have my body won’t lead to my death. Considering that, perhaps my resistance to him is a luxury in itself. 

From the perspective of those children who didn’t even get to live until they were ten, my concerns may seem insignificant.

“Still, I can’t help but hate it…”

It’s not like I have any particular affection for men in general. However, I can’t bear Prevost’s lingering gaze when he looks at me. It feels repulsive, and no matter how much rationalization I try to do in my mind, it won’t change the fact that I find it unbearable.

With a heavy heart, I force myself to move toward the room where Prevost awaits.