Vol 2 Chapter 11 – Polishing My Wife with Hometown Super-Tech

Lio II, sent to Japan via teleportation magic, goes traveling.

Because he needed magic to operate in Japan, concealment magic was hastily developed and imbued into him, and since there’s no mana in Japan, he becomes like he’s turned invisible—nobody notices him.

All sorts of magic have been engraved into Lio II, but originally—even if he’s made of mithril—he doesn’t have the specs to take this many spells.

The secret is simple: Lio II’s spherical core has a multi-layer stacking structure, and since each layer can hold about three to four engravings, most of the magic I can use has been carved into him.

Unlike Yumeba’s Yume II, which is built mainly to support Yumeba, my Lio II is built for versatility—meant to temporarily perform at specs equal to mine and show adaptability.

In other words, the goal is to secure combat power as if there were two of me in an emergency.

Well, there’s a limit to how much mana he can hold, so it really is only temporary.

That’s why Lio II, sent to Japan, travels all over the place.

Mostly to stores called drugstores, where he stores beauty products for Yumeba in storage magic—and then leaves.

It’s obviously shoplifting, but please cut him some slack, because with concealment magic nobody notices.

Even if Lio II tried to pay, it would only cause problems.

On Earth, where there’s no mana, Lio II can’t even operate for half a day, and on top of that he needs to save mana for the return teleportation, so his actual activity time—taking a safe margin—is around five hours.

So using the items Lio II brought back from Japan, I polish Yumeba up.

I wash Yumeba’s red hair with high-end shampoo, condition it to smooth out the texture, and polish up her body with high-end body soap.

“Fwaah~. I feel like I’ve been reborn.”

After I’ve polished her up until she’s gleaming, I use toner and serum to give her face a nice, hydrated glow.

“This is kind of… like… what is this? It’s like—something amazing.”

Yumeba herself seemed confused, like she couldn’t find the right words, but I’m satisfied because my wife is getting even prettier.

And just like that, Yumeba-san’s hair is glossy, and her skin is silky-smooth.

After a bath means it’s already night, and right now it’s just the two of us in the room.

“Yumeba, you’re beautiful.”

“Lio, I’m happy.”

So I hugged Yumeba—who was always beautiful, but today was on another level—and kissed her…

“May I have a moment?”

““…………””

Right before I pushed her down onto the bed, the door opened, and the strongest creature in the world peeked her face in.

“…………What?”

Interrupted at the absolute best moment, Yumeba-san’s mood clearly soured, even though it was her own mother—she asked in a voice full of resentment.

“Those products you used to fix your hair and skin—share them with me, too.”

“…They’re in our bathroom, so just take them if you want.”

“Thank you♪”

And with that, the strongest creature in the world left in a great mood.

““…………””

We stayed on guard for a bit, but once we realized she wasn’t coming back…

“Yumeba.”

“…Lio.”

We decided to continue.

Yumeba and I aren’t the kind of couple to get discouraged over something like that.

◇◇◇

Even after a full night, Yumeba’s hair was still glossy, and her skin was still silky-smooth.

“~♪”

And Yukina-san’s hair was glossy too, and her skin was silky-smooth.

How old even is this woman…

“What is it?”

“Hii! N-nothing at all!”

Nope. Thinking about this woman’s age is bad for my lifespan.

Empty mind. Become empty-minded.

“Mom, stop wanting everything every time Lio brings back something useful.”

“But I want Darling to always see me looking beautiful♪”

“…I mean, I get it, but still…”

Saying that, Yumeba kept glancing at me.

Yukina-san is right here, but this really isn’t the kind of atmosphere where I can refuse.

I took Yumeba’s hand and pulled her closer, and…

“Today you’re even more beautiful than usual, Yumeba.”

I praised Yumeba with a line so sweet it made my teeth ache.

“Ehehe♪ I always want to be beautiful in front of Lio♡”

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Yukina-san heading toward her husband, but the adult response is to pretend I didn’t see anything.

And so, today too, I saw Yumeba off as she headed to the Imperial Guard’s training—reluctantly, with lingering hugs and kisses.

After Yumeba left, I used clairvoyance magic: True Eyes, and sent my gaze into the castle.

I figured I should check on Yunix, like the Emperor had mentioned.

I searched all over and couldn’t find him for a while, but in the end, I found him in the castle’s rear garden.

What Yunix was doing there was…

“This pack of gutless worms! Get up! Get up and run!”

“…Seriously, cut us a break…”

He was right in the middle of putting the two men—black-haired and brown-haired—through Spartan training.

Except the two guys clearly had zero motivation. They jogged lazily, took breaks, and eventually flopped down and started snoring.

“Who said you could sleep?! Get up already!”

“Wah—!”

Yunix chanted water magic and dumped it over the two of them.

“Come on, man, nobody’s into sports-guts training these days!”

“This is impossible if you just spring it on us. Start us on something light first!”

“Y-You two…!”

Yeah. Looks like Yunix is having a rough time too.

Also, when I saw them before, Yumeba beat them down so fast I didn’t notice, but judging by their looks and the way they talked, these two were obviously Japanese.

And while they had no motivation, their physical ability was high—movements that clearly showed they had power separate from what their bodies should naturally have.

(Those cheat reincarnators?) (Why are they with Yunix?)

I don’t know the details, but I had a bad feeling this was going to turn into something annoying.

(Hm?)

As I watched the two slack off and Yunix keep yelling for a while, I realized I wasn’t the only one observing this trio.

When I traced where that gaze was coming from…

“What are those two, I wonder. They’re clearly spineless, and yet… their physical ability is quite high.”

I found Serina watching the three of them.

And where Serina was standing was not the room prepared for Serina inside the palace—she was in the room I used to use.

“Lady Serina. Why are you going out of your way to use this room?”

Serina’s maid was there with her too, looking utterly fed up with Serina’s behavior.

“Obviously, because I want to feel Lio-sama by being in a room where even a trace of Lio-sama’s scent remains♪”

She said that and dove onto the bed.

“Ahh, the faint lingering scent of Lio-sama. What a shame that Yumeba-sama’s scent has been left behind as well.”

Well, the last time that bed was used was when Yumeba and I crossed the line for the first time.

“Lady Serina. If someone sees you like that, there’s no way you can explain it away.”

“Hmph. I must hurry and disgrace that trash Yunix and achieve a broken engagement.”

“…………”

Serina-san, you really are something…

“Hah!”

As I stared in disbelief, Serina suddenly lifted her face from the bed and started looking around, eyes darting.

“Lady Serina, what is it?”

“…I can feel Lio-sama’s gaze.”

“Huh?”

Crap. Seriously?

Even Yumeba still can’t fully sense it, but Serina somehow noticed the gaze from my clairvoyance magic: True Eyes.

That’s on par with Yukina-san’s gaze-detection.

“S-So what should I do?! Should I take it off? This is my chance to show Lio-sama my grown, naked body—”

“…………”

Nope. Yumeba-san would cut something off, so I shut down clairvoyance magic: True Eyes.

Yeah. Just as I expected, I was able to confirm Serina has broken free of the brainwashing and regained her memories, but more than that… I got shown a level of sheer guts that was beyond what I imagined.

“…I should contact Yumeba, just in case.”

It’s better not to leave even the smallest opening for Yumeba to misunderstand.

With that thought, I contacted Yumeba using the telepathy device.

《Lio? What’s wrong?》

Yumeba picked up right away.

The Imperial Guard’s training must be boring for her, after all.

“Ah—so, actually…”

Anyway, I told her Serina’s current situation, and while I was at it, Yunix’s suspicious scheme too.

《…You saw it?》

“I didn’t! Absolutely not, I swear I didn’t! I’ve decided I won’t look at anyone else’s naked body besides Yumeba-san’s!”

《Then that’s fine♪》

Hearing Yumeba’s voice, cheerful as ever, I let out a relieved breath.

Yeah, I’m glad I called early.

Crisis of getting cut off: avoided.

《More importantly, listen, Lio. I’ve been in training, but…》

“Y-Yes, ma’am.”

And after that, I ended up on a long telepathy call with Yumeba, talking and talking.

She must’ve been really bored—she sounded happy just to be able to talk with me.

Yeah. A long chat with my wife was fun on a level that doesn’t even compare to being forced to listen to the Emperor complain forever.

Between an old man and my beautiful young wife, the difference in how it feels is just… not even comparable.

Yumeba and I kept the telepathy going nonstop until noon, and during the lunch break we promised to go out together in the imperial capital for a meal, then hung up for now.

“Just in case, I checked Yunix too, but… that’s not even worth talking about.”

After Yumeba and I met up in the imperial capital, I heard what she saw, and yeah—Yunix’s side didn’t look like a problem even from Yumeba’s perspective.

“Even if they got ten times stronger, they still wouldn’t be our enemies.”

“…The gap was bigger than I expected.”

Yeah. I knew it, but compared to their cheats, Yumeba-san is clearly the real cheat.

Or rather, House Saionji itself is basically a cheat, too.

“Anyway, what should we eat?”

“I’ve lived in the imperial capital for years, but I’ve only ever been to fancy restaurants, so I don’t even know what kinds of places are out there.”

“Then I’ll take you to a place I recommend♪”

Either way, Yumeba and I held hands and headed out to get lunch together.

Of course, we spent every last minute flirting, and after I walked Yumeba to the royal castle, I saw her off with hugs and kisses…

“…I want to be with you more.”

“Y-Yeah. I feel like my condition is kind of bad too, so maybe I should leave early♪”

We turned around right there in front of the royal castle, and decided to keep the date going.

◇◇◇

We got scolded.

“No meeting up during lunch break. And no contacting each other during training unless it’s an emergency.”

“Ehh~!”

“That’s so unfair!”

“B-A-N-N-E-D, okay?”

““……Yes.””

Sure, yesterday we ended up staying over in the heat of the date, but she didn’t have to get that mad.

“Ah. Wait—maybe Mom’s mad because we didn’t call about staying out until it was already night…”

“Did you say something?”

“…No, nothing.”

I see. She’s not mad that we skipped training—she’s mad because we called too late and Yukina-san and the others couldn’t piggyback on the overnight date.

I suggested with eye contact that next time we should call earlier, and Yumeba gave a small nod.

After all these years, we can do this much.

“Just so you know, calling ahead still doesn’t make skipping training okay.”

““……We’re sorry.””

Even Yukina-san—also an old acquaintance—could see right through us.

Today too, I saw Yumeba off as she reluctantly headed to the Imperial Guard’s training, with hugs and kisses, and once again I ended up with free time.

Just in case, I checked Yunix and the two cheat reincarnators with clairvoyance magic: True Eyes, but nothing had changed, and as for Serina…

Glance. Glance.

For some reason she was wearing something strangely provocative and sending her gaze somewhere, so I immediately shut down clairvoyance magic: True Eyes and looked away.

When we were kids, she wasn’t that weird… so maybe some lingering brainwashing effects are still hanging on?

And while I was at it, I figured I’d check on Yumeba too, when…

“E-M-I-L-I-O, dear?”

“Hii!”

At some point, the strongest creature in the world was right behind me!

“I hope you’re not thinking of breaking our promise the very next day, are you?”

“O-Of course not!”

I was only thinking about checking with clairvoyance magic: True Eyes—I wasn’t even thinking about calling!

But just to be safe, I’ll stop using clairvoyance magic: True Eyes to peek at Yumeba too.

“Then I’m glad♪”

“Ahaha…”

The pressure that almost made me wet myself vanished, but all I could manage was a dry laugh.

It’s good this is morning—if it were midnight, I’m honestly confident I’d leak for real.

So, with free time again, I worked on analyzing the smartphone until noon, and in the afternoon, to kill time, I decided to transform into Alisa and go to the Adventurers’ Guild.

As usual, I teleported into the imperial capital, walked to the Adventurers’ Guild from there, and opened the door and went inside like always, but…

“Whoa. Spotted a black-haired, Japanese-style beauty!”

“Ohhh~”

For some reason, the black-haired and brown-haired cheat reincarnators were in there.

I don’t know why they were here, but anyway, I looked for the receptionist in charge, Saria, and…

“Ah. Welcome, Alisa-san!”

Before I even had to search, Saria came running over to me with quick little steps.

“Long time no see. Here—this is a souvenir from when I went to the sea.”

“Wah♪”

I handed Saria a wooden box packed with fresh fish from the sea, buried in ice.

If it’s this, it should last a few days even after I take it out of the dimensional storage item box.

“F-fish…?”

“Gulp.”

The two former Japanese guys stared like they were starving for fish, but of course I ignored them.

“But it’s rare, isn’t it? Having someone here besides me.”

“Ah, yes. It seems they’re people who came from outside the imperial capital, and today they came looking for work, but…”

“Is there even adventurer work in the imperial capital?”

“…If it’s just errands.”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought~”

I’m not saying I regret it, but apparently the impact of freeing the forest east of the imperial capital was huge.

“Those two have strength on par with A-class adventurers, so I recommended they go somewhere else, but they say they have business in the imperial capital, so they won’t leave.”

“…A-class?”

I’d only seen them get completely pummeled by Yumeba, so they didn’t look that strong to me.

“Yes. They have ability, but as for achievements, or rather… you don’t really feel any motivation from them, so it seems they’re stuck at B-class.”

“Ahh…”

It was obvious even to me, but apparently the guild staff could tell they had no motivation too.

Even while feeling their stares, I decided to have tea with Saria and do some “small talk”—meaning information gathering.

As far as Saria knew, nothing that looked like it would become a problem had happened yet, but…

“Hey, hey. Who’s that super-pretty girl? She looks like she totally belongs here—don’t tell me she’s an adventurer too?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

I couldn’t help hearing the two of them asking other staff about me.

“…She’s Alisa-san, an A-class adventurer.”

The staff member being questioned glanced my way, but seemed to decide to give only the bare minimum—information they could look up anyway.

Well, the staff here know who I really am, and even beyond that, to them I’m the hero who protected the imperial capital.

They’re not going to casually share my information with outsiders.

“A-class, huh. But skill-wise, we’re stronger, right?”

“…Probably.”

“That red-haired woman from before was a cutie too, but she’s a no-go. She was violent like a gorilla.”

“…No thanks on violent women.”

Crack. The air around us froze, and at the same time I felt something inside me snap.

“Ahh, crap…”

Maybe she heard it too—Saria buried her face on the desk with her head in her hands, but she didn’t do something pointless like try to stop me.

And I rose slowly to my feet.

“Oh. She’s coming this way.”

“I-I’m getting nervous.”

And as I approached the two idiots saying that, I…

“Hogyeh!”

First, I delivered a straight punch to the brown-haired one’s face.

He spun about three and a half rotations in midair before slamming into the floor, rolling across it, and crashing into the wall, where he finally stopped.

“Huh? W-wait… what?”

The black-haired one, who’d been watching, looked shaken, his eyes flicking between me and the fallen brown-haired guy, but I ignored him and stepped in…

“Oboeh!”

…and drove a fist into his gut.

His body folded in half as he spiraled through the air, smashed his head into the ceiling, then dropped to the floor with a thud.

“I won’t show mercy to anyone who insults Yumeba-san—no matter who they are.”

“Yeah, that’s about right~”

With a look like she’d given up on something, Saria told the staff to clean up the two pieces of trash.

Seems there isn’t a single staff member in this guild who’s going to treat what I did as a problem.