I Fell in Love with Someone I Shouldn't Have Fallen in Love with

Ninth Grade Realities

I’ve been having lots fun with Souji-kun lately.

What should I make for our late night snacks this weekend?

What kind of stories should we talk about?

Where should we go during the summer break?

I often find myself thinking about these things.

Maybe that’s why I always seem to look happy.

Sakura-chan even asked me the other day,

‘You seem to look very happy lately. Did you finally get a boyfriend?’

Of course, I did my best to deny it.

I just hope that these happy days would last forever, but just before summer break begins, various realities come over me.

The first one is high school entrance exam.

We will need to decide which high school we want to apply to soon.

If possible, I want to go to the same high school as Souji-kun.

I know that’s impossible, but I can’t hold back the faint of hope I’m feeling in my heart.

I haven’t asked Souji-kun which high school he is going to apply to, but given his financial situation, I think he will apply for a public school. Going into a public school is not easy, you will need good grades to get into them. On the other hand, my grade is just average, so I won’t be able to apply for a public high school.

There is nothing that can be done about this.

So, I decided to write the name of a private girl’s high school on my application form and submit it.

Then the second one—

I was confessed to by three different guys this year.

The first one is from a boy who is in the same class as me. We even hardly ever talked, but one day, he confessed his feelings to me. I think he is in the tennis club.

The second is from a boy who is in a different class. I don’t know his name, and I even vaguely remember seeing his face at school.

The third is from a boy who was in the same class as me during my first year of middle school, but now he is in a different class as me. If I remember correctly, he is in the baseball club.

Of course, I turned them all down on the spot.

I have been confessed to by two other boys in my second year of middle school, but I also turned them down then.

In my second year, I wasn’t interested in dating or anything like that.

Rather, I was even scared to talk and meet with a boy, let alone dating them.

But now…yeah, I’m not interested in any other boys except Souji-kun.

I can’t help but to wonder how happy would I be if Souji-kun confessed his feelings to me.

However, Souji-kun doesn’t seem interested in romance…

If it’s with Souji-kun, I’m not afraid to talk and being alone with him. In fact, I enjoy my time I spend with Souji-kun.

However, we can’t hang out very often. At school, our classmates will notice if I always hang out with Souji- often, and at home, Mama will likely to make a fuss about it if she catches me talking with Souji-kun. So, I can’t spend time with Souji-kun unless we do it secretly, just thinking about it makes me sad.

Why is that neither the exam nor love seem to go the way I want them to?

Even if I want to go to the same high school as Souji-kun, my grades are so much lower than his which makes it impossible.

I keep getting confessed to by people I’m not interested in, and I can’t even talk freely with the person I like.

I wish summer break would come sooner. Then I’d have more chance to spend time alone with Souji-kun. That’s right, we promised to do our summer break homework together, and Souji-kun promised that he will go to the pool with me.

Now that I have finished reading the book that Souji-kun recommended to me, I will ask him again for his next recommendation.

As I recall, the school library is open during the summer break. Perhaps, I can spend some quality time alone with Souji-kun together there.