All I Wanted Was Affection and Donations from the Beautiful Girls Who Left the Orphanage... sobs - 15 [Sword Saint Rebecca's Perspective]
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- 15 [Sword Saint Rebecca's Perspective]
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Chapter 15 [Sword Saint Rebecca’s Perspective]
[Sword Saint Rebecca’s Perspective]
Leon and Hibiki-san returned from the Baron’s house.
As soon as I saw them, my heart fluttered.
Leon was covered in dirt and dust, his body riddled with wounds.
Yet, he didn’t show any gloom; despite his unsteady steps, he wore a contented smile.
Hibiki-san, lending her shoulder to Leon, looked worried about him, yet she also seemed apologetic.
But somehow, she didn’t seem entirely displeased.
Seeing Hibiki-san, who wore a pleased smile despite being dumbfounded by Leon’s jests, made my heart tighten further.
“Enough already. If you want to apologize so badly, why don’t you become my wife?”
“Please, don’t dodge the question. I’m being serious here.”
Like me, the other orphans, who were also alone in the world, stood aghast as if time had stopped.
By then, Leon had become an indispensable part of this orphanage – it wouldn’t be an exaggeration to call him our father.
Seeing him and Hibiki-san, who was like a mother to us, return as if performing a comedic duo act was too much to take in calmly.
“What happened, Father? You’re injured!”
“L-Leon-sama!? I-I’ll use healing magic immediately―”
Kuu, the alchemist who was the first among us to develop her talent, and Eris, who had learned holy magic, rushed over in a panic.
“I’m sorry for worrying you. But I’m fine. It’s just a scratch. More importantly – Rebecca, can I have a moment?”
My heart leapt at the sound of Leon calling my name. I was prepared for what was to come.
Leon, a stranger to me, showered me with a lot of affection.
I always wondered why he was so kind. But that all ends today.
It’s only natural. After all, I’ve repaid his kindness with betrayal.
My heart clenches painfully.
—I’m going to be abandoned.
Abandoned again.
I don’t want that! The place I finally found where I belonged, where I was accepted, I’m about to lose it!
I was secretly jealous of Kuu and Eris.
They too had dark pasts. That’s why their awakening should have been a joyful event.
Yet, I felt left out, as if I was the only one who couldn’t be useful to Leon. I grew increasingly violent out of frustration, jealousy, and anger.
Before I knew it, I was on the verge of tears.
“Sorry, everyone. Could you let Rebecca and I have a moment alone?”
When Leon took my hand and led me somewhere, I felt like I wasn’t really alive.
Where was he taking me? To another orphanage?
No, that might be the better outcome. Maybe a violent girl like me, who lashes out too easily, would be sold to a slave trader.
I was filled with a desire to cry out right then.
To cry, to scream, to apologize.
I was aware that I was trying to say what was convenient, that it was a selfish request.
But I still didn’t want to be abandoned.
I didn’t want to lose that warm feeling of being praised by Leon and laughing with everyone.
—Please forgive me.
I was about to say that when Leon stopped walking.
He had brought me deep into the mountains.
In front of us was a large rock.
Leon sat down and looked straight at me.
As he made a preparatory movement and his shoulders opened wide, I braced myself for pain.
I knew that nobles held power. Leon was a commoner. He must have been hurt a lot by the baron.
Now, I was about to experience what Leon had endured, a punishment for my actions, to ensure I never repeated such a mistake.
But that was okay.
Pain—I was used to it, having been abused by my parents for so long.
If enduring pain meant being forgiven, I could bear it. This place was all I had left.
So, please, don’t abandon me!
Just as I gritted my teeth, preparing for the pain, I heard:
“―Eh?”
“Thank you for becoming Eris’ knight.”
I couldn’t comprehend what was happening to me. I only felt a warm emotion flowing through me.
Leon was embracing me—the very person who had lashed out at a noble.
I couldn’t stop the large tears that now flowed freely, as if a taut string inside me had snapped.
“Uhh, uh, are you stupid? Why aren’t you angry…?”
“Angry? Why should I be?”
“Hic, uh, uh, because I—I hit him!”
“Oh, is that what you mean?”
Leon slowly pulled away and gently stroked my head.
“Listen, Rebecca. I don’t just dislike nobles―I hate them.”
“―Hate?”
“Yes. Of course, there are some who are genuinely noble characters, born to be so. But I can’t forgive those who use their power to bully others and shirk their responsibilities. So, I’m grateful that you punished him in my place. If I had done it, the orphanage would suffer.”
“But because of that, Leon, you—”
“—This? A little spit and it’ll heal. You could even lick it if you want.”
“Wha—what!? Idiot! I won’t lick it, you idiot! Don’t say weird things!”
I overreacted to the joke Leon made to ease the tension and fear.
Please don’t say such strange things out of the blue. I am a lady, after all.
Well, well… if Leon really insists, then… maybe I could… try to do it… ah.
I took his words seriously and quickly banished the image that came to my mind.
T-that sort of thing is too soon. But when I’m older, if Leon wishes for it… ah.
Embarrassed by the risqué fantasy that had crossed my mind, I couldn’t look directly at Leon and hung my head.
My cheeks felt unmistakably hot.
W-what should I do? Leon probably knows exactly what I’m thinking. Oh no, it’s so embarrassing…
The heavy emotions from before were nowhere to be found, replaced by a feeling of happiness.
Speare, who quickly learned to read and write and was now being recognized for her talent by Leon, often wrote “romance novels.”
They were just words on a page, but I couldn’t take my eyes off them. They were incredibly interesting.
Thanks to that, we were all eager to read Speare’s writings, which made us more enthusiastic about our studies.
Her creativity was amazing—something I could never match. Her works, a rare form of entertainment for us, were especially captivating in their depiction of male and female relationships.
Having been exposed to Speare’s imaginative works, I found myself embarrassingly flustered.
I sneaked a glance at Leon, who was wearing a wry smile.
“…Ahem. Anyway, there’s absolutely nothing for the child Rebecca to worry about.”
“Uh, okay.”
Leon cleared his throat in an obvious way and then spoke kindly to me.
Ah, I see. This feeling—this must be what it’s like to fall in love with someone of the opposite sex.
I really don’t want to be apart from Leon. I want to be useful to him too.
But I can’t learn Kuu’s alchemy or Eris’s holy magic. I can’t understand what they’re talking about with Leon.
Even Shion, who acts mature, might not produce outstanding results yet, but she’s quick with reading, writing, and calculations—it’s probably only a matter of time before she exhibits her talents in that area.
The day when others will recognize the appeal of the “romance novels” Speare writes isn’t far off. Everyone truly has remarkable talents.
Compared to them, why am I so unintelligent?
Ah, no, this isn’t good. Just when Leon is comforting me, I feel like crying again.
“Listen carefully, Rebecca. You have infinite potential. You just haven’t seen the results you want yet, but a brilliant future is surely waiting for you. That’s why I’m hesitant to limit the paths you can take…”
“—I don’t understand, Leon. I’m not smart. Say it more clearly!”
I admit it to myself and others—I’m really not intelligent. I can’t understand anything complicated. That’s why Leon’s indirect way of speaking frustrates me.
“Rebecca, you have a talent. If polished, you can shine in that field. But I’ve always hesitated to recommend it to you, and that includes now.”
I have always marveled at everyone’s genius. And Leon, who has recognized their talents, seems like a distant existence.
I don’t understand why he hesitates to tell me.
But from my perspective, a talent that can shine if polished is something I desperately desire.
Like everyone else, I want to be useful to Leon. I want to do something for him, to repay his kindness. I yearn for a talent that’s second to none.
―Desire.
Such a complicated word, seemingly unfit for a fool like me, crosses my mind.
“Tell me! I don’t want to just chase after everyone’s backs! I want to walk alongside them! With Leon—with Hibiki-san—with everyone at the orphanage! I don’t know why you’re hesitating, but I promise I’ll meet your expectations! I won’t betray you ever again! So please—please tell me!”
It was a desperate plea. But I was certain. It was an opportunity for me, who knew only how to resort to violence and had nothing but physical strength, to dramatically change.
Like a disciple seeking guidance, I decided to express my feelings through a “kneeling bow,” like Leon often does.
Being as kind as he is, he must be reluctant to limit my path to just one option. That’s why he hesitates to teach me, knowing I might blindly follow just one path.
But I was already resolved.
If it meant being useful to him, even if it would change my life entirely, it didn’t matter. I couldn’t care less about appearances.
“Alright. I will also make up my mind. Rebecca. Your talent is—”
Gulp.
I swallowed hard.
Leon’s words continued.
“―Swordsmanship.”
This was the beginning of my journey to becoming a Sword Saint.