A Story About a Girl Who Took Life for Granted and Fell in Love With a Kind and Introverted Boy - Chapter 32

Be born into this world,
Next time, I hope it’s not in a way
Where words alone bring so much pain—
May I be born into a life
Where I don’t suffer so much.

—From The Morning of Eternal Farewell

Tashiro-san’s drastic change became a hot topic, not just among our classmates but throughout the entire school.

Even I, Yanagihara, couldn’t help but be stunned by how much she had changed.

“Good morning.”

The first thing that surprised us was Tashiro-san’s hair.

That morning, when she walked into the classroom, everyone’s eyes widened at the sight of her.

Her hair, which used to fall past her shoulder blades, was now cut so short it barely reached her ears. She had chopped it all off.

“K-Kana-chan? What happened to your hair?”

When a classmate asked her that, Tashiro-san prefaced her answer with, “Oh, this?” before explaining:

“I cut it as a way of marking a change—so I can leave my old self behind.”

“To change yourself…?”

“Yeah.”

“What kind of change?”

“Well, a lot of things, you know.”

With that, she trailed off and quietly took her seat. Then she pulled out her math textbook and notebook from her bag and began studying with an intense expression.

“…”

To change herself.

Watching her study so intently, we all realized Tashiro-san was serious about what she had said.

Ding-dong-ding-dong

Even during breaks between classes, lunch, and even homeroom, Tashiro-san kept studying.

She worked with the urgency of someone facing an impending exam, never once looking away from her notebook.

Even when conversations buzzed around her, she seemed oblivious, her right hand flying across the pages with a pen.

“Hey, Kana-chan, want to go to karaoke today?”

“I’ll pass.”

She turned down invitations to hang out after school without a second thought, picking up her bag and heading straight home without stopping to chat.

Tashiro-san had truly changed. Before the recent cultural festival, she used to hang out with us almost daily. Now, it was a complete 180.

“…What’s going on with Tashiro-san, I wonder?”

I was at a burger joint with Naito-chan, mumbling absentmindedly amidst the chatter of other customers.

“Why did she suddenly start studying so intensely?”

“…”

“Is there some big test coming up? But our school’s proficiency tests aren’t until next month. Maybe it’s for some cram school thing…”

“Probably.”

“Huh?”

“No, it’s definitely for Saito-kun.”

Naito-chan picked up a fry and took a small bite.

“For Saito-kun?”

“Yeah. I think Tashiro-san is doing all this because of him.”

“For Saito-kun… But how does her studying help him?”

“…”

“Oh, maybe she wants to become a doctor herself and cure Saito-kun? Something like that?”

“Hm… Maybe. That sounds pretty far-fetched, but with Tashiro-san, I wouldn’t be surprised.”

Naito-chan frowned slightly, gazing out the window with a pained expression.

“What’s wrong, Naito-chan?”

“It’s just… I’m worried.”

“Worried?”

“I feel like Tashiro-san is overdoing it.”

“…”

“She was never the type who excelled in studying before. For her to suddenly take it so seriously, it must be really tough.”

“…”

Truthfully, I had been worried about the same thing.

Was she pushing herself too hard? Was she going beyond her limits? The intensity of her focus made it hard not to worry.

“By the way, did you hear? I broke up with Maeda the other day,” a girl at a nearby table said.

Two flashy girls, adorned with pastel-blue nails, pink scrunchies, and multiple piercings, were chatting animatedly.

“Really? Why?”

“His way of holding chopsticks was weird, and it gave me the ick.”

“Ugh, I get that. Messy chopstick skills are such a turn-off.”

“Right? Like, go back to kindergarten!”

“My boyfriend didn’t pay for me on our last date.”

“No way! A guy who doesn’t pay for a girl? That’s just wrong.”

“Exactly! Totally unacceptable.”

They scrolled on their phones, exchanging complaints about their partners.

For some reason, their conversation stuck with me.

It was ten days after my visit to the burger joint with Naito-chan when I finally learned why Tashiro-san had suddenly started studying.

By then, everyone had developed an unspoken rule: “Don’t disturb Tashiro-san while she’s studying.”

Hardly anyone tried to talk to her anymore. Even the teachers approached her cautiously, saying things like, “Tashiro, do you have a moment?”

The rare chance I had to speak with her came after school one day.

“Hey, hey! Is the coach coming to practice today?”

“Hirose! Let’s hit the arcade!”

“By the way, Rika’s house is pretty close to school, isn’t it?”

The classroom buzzed with voices as I quietly packed up my things.

(What should I do when I get home today? …I have nothing to do.)

Since I have no hobbies, even if I go home early, there’s nothing to occupy my time.

If I joined a club, maybe I wouldn’t feel this bored. But I couldn’t find any clubs I was interested in… so here I am, near the end of my second year, still part of the “going-home club.”

“Hmm?”

Suddenly, I noticed Kana Tashiro.

She usually leaves quickly and energetically, but today, she’s still in the classroom, absorbed in studying.

“The Earth’s axial tilt is… 23.4 degrees…”

She mutters to herself, furrowing her brow.

“……………”

As I kept watching her, I realized the classroom was now empty except for the two of us.

No one else from our class was here anymore.

Tashiro still showed no signs of going home. She didn’t even seem to notice the end-of-day chime.

“Tashiro,” I called out.

“Hmm?” she replied, her eyes still fixed on her workbook.

“Are you okay? Aren’t you going home?”

“Yeah, I just thought I’d finish this section before I leave.”

“……………”

“The Earth’s rotation period is… 23 hours, 56 minutes, and 4 seconds…”

“…Why?”

“Huh?”

“Why are you studying so hard?”

“……………”

For the first time, Tashiro put down her mechanical pencil.

She placed it gently on her workbook, exhaled softly, and said:

“For myself.”

“…Huh?”

“I’m studying so I can stay by Kenji’s side.”

Tashiro looked up at me and met my gaze. Her face was much brighter than I expected.

Her gentle smile softened her features, and the intense focus she had earlier was gone.

“You’re studying… to stay by Kenji’s side?”

“Yeah. When Kenji wakes up, I want to surprise him!”

“……………”

“I want to say, ‘Look how much my grades have improved!’”

“Tashiro…”

“And besides, studying a lot will help me get a better job, right? Kenji might never wake up, so the hospital bills will probably cost a fortune. I want to be able to work somewhere that pays well.”

That’s why I’m studying, Tashiro said with a bright smile.

“……………”

‘By the way, I broke up with Maeda the other day.’

I suddenly recalled a conversation I overheard between some girls yesterday.

“Tashiro,” I asked.

“Yeah?”

“What would you think if Kenji held his chopsticks the wrong way?”

“Huh? Kenji’s chopsticks?”

“Yeah.”

“What would I think? I’d probably just say, ‘Your grip is weird, isn’t it?’”

“And… would you want to break up with him because of that?”

“What!? No way! That’s ridiculous!”

“……………”

“Why? Is this some kind of personality test?”

“Ah, no… Yesterday, I saw a special on TV about the frog effect…”

“The frog effect? Oh, you mean when something small makes someone look uncool?”

“Y-Yeah. There was someone on the show who said they broke up because their partner held chopsticks the wrong way.”

“Wow, really? People like that exist?”

“Yeah, and they were around our age.”

“Hmm, I might’ve understood that before, but now? Not really.”

“Why not?”

“Because it’s so much more fun to remember why you like someone than to look for reasons to dislike them.”

Tashiro said that with a bright smile.

“……………”

“Hey, Yanagihara, can I get back to studying now?”

“Oh, sorry! I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“It’s fine, no worries.”

She picked up her mechanical pencil and returned to her workbook.

“Good luck with your studying. Don’t overdo it, though—it’s tough to keep going if you push too hard.”

“I’m fine, really. I don’t think it’s tough at all.”

“Huh?”

“It’s fun. Right now, it’s really fun.”

“Fun…?”

“Yeah,” Tashiro said as she worked on her problems.

“If there’s something I can do for Kenji, I want to do it, no matter what. That’s all I can think about.”

“……………”

“So every time I solve a problem, it feels like Kenji is saying, ‘Good job, Kana,’ or ‘You’re amazing.’”

“……………”

“By the time Kenji wakes up, I’m going to have studied so, so much.”

“Tashiro…”

“The prime meridian runs through Greenwich in London…”

At that moment, I realized something.

I had never been as envious of someone as I was then.

To love someone this deeply, to devote yourself to something so completely…

(…I wonder.)

──If I fell in love, could I be like this too?

In the quiet classroom, the only sound was the soft scratch of her pencil on paper.