You Girls Are Way Too Obsessed With A Lone Wolf Like Me - Volume SS: 7 and 8

Volume SS: 7 and 8

SS⑦:  Ruri-nyan & Haruichi-kun’s Adventurous Summer

A story about a camping trip that took place one summer.

On a sandy beach with a sweeping view of the ocean, feeling the blazing sun on their skin, a teriyaki grilling session was underway on a spread-out sheet. They were grilling mackerel, but salmon or sardines would do just fine.

Why is it that salmon is called both sake and shake?

There’s a theory about regional dialects, and another about the difference between raw and cooked salmon.

Hmm… I don’t know.

Thinking about such utterly trivial things alone is what makes this time so wonderful.

As one side of the fish seemed about done grilling, they rolled over from lying face-down to face-up.

“Hm? …Kurashiki?”

What’s this? Instead of the blue sky or the sun, the mischievous girl Ruri Kurashiki filled their entire field of vision.

The impact was overwhelming, with her standing over them in a bikini. The soft-looking cleavage, petite navel, and tight hips—things they’d never normally get to see—were on full display. Summer vacation was truly here.

It was hard to know where to look, but she didn’t seem to care one bit. After taking a sip from a can of juice she’d probably bought, she plopped down beside them with a, “I’m gonna bother you~!”

“Got something to say?”

“Can’t I mess with Himemiya without a reason?”

“Not counting messing with me as a reason is so you.”

“Take it as a compliment, nyah~♪”

She sure seems to be enjoying life.

It wasn’t clear if Kurashiki was seriously here to prank me.

But still…

“Hey.”

“What’s up?”

Holding my hand and asking, “What’s up?”—that’s not how it works.

What was she plotting? Lying side by side, Kurashiki grabbed my hand. In a lover’s grip, no less.

Then, she raised her smartphone and snapped a picture of our intertwined hands.

The shot seemed to be a success, as Kurashiki’s face lit up with a beaming smile.

“Perfect♪ A photo of just our hands screams ‘newly dating couple’!”

She deserves to be roasted by every lovey-dovey couple out there.

“Listen, when we get to college or start working, there’ll be tons of girls’ nights, right?”

“Yeah, probably.”

“Exactly! And at those, there’ll definitely be a contest to brag about ex-boyfriends, right?”

“Maybe.”

“That’s where it comes in! If I’m the only one without a boyfriend from my high school summer, that’d be so lame! Stocking up on pics like this now won’t hurt anybody, right?”

It’ll only bring divine punishment.

Ignoring my obvious discomfort, she wasn’t satisfied with just one lover’s grip shot. She snuggled closer, snapping more selfies while lying side by side with me.

“Darling, say cheese♪ Yes, yes~ That annoyed vibe is perfect~ It’s like I’m head-over-heels for my boyfriend, but he secretly cherishes me more. It’s oozing out, and it’s so good~”

How many stories does this girl see in a single photo?

“Let’s see… ‘Dreamy swimsuit date with Haruichi-kun’ with a heart~”

“Don’t save it with a title like that.”

“Next summer, you’ll go from Haruichi-kun to just Haru-kun, so keep that in mind!”

“Am I gonna have to do this again next year…?”

“Nyahahaha♪ Be honored!”

She even declared, “Forget next year—how about we do this 10, 20 years from now?!” with a pseudo-proposal vibe, closing the distance even further.

Was it the summer’s fault, or the unusual setting? Kurashiki, grinning with her white teeth gleaming, was even more hyper than usual.

Like a kitten playfully nuzzling its mother, she rubbed her slender shoulders and glossy hair against my body in a marking attack. She kept snapping photos from all sorts of poses and angles.

When a goofball gets too hyper, they’re bound to cause trouble. That’s the rule, the market standard.

Kurashiki was no exception.

Divine punishment struck swiftly. Thrashing around like an idiot, she knocked over a can of juice on the sheet.

The ice-cold cider trickled along the sheet, soaking Kurashiki’s backside.

A bolt from the blue.

Cider on Kurashiki’s butt.

“Nyaa!?” “Whoa…!”

Her body jolted at the unexpected sensation. Or rather, she arched back dramatically.

Clinging to me…

It was only when she clung to me that I realized Kurashiki had been keeping a proper distance between me until now.

Our current distance wasn’t just zero—it was negative.

My exposed skin pressed tightly together, her chest, lower body, and the delicate areas barely covered by her bikini were plastered against me. Her petite, slender, yet toned and supple body was felt all too vividly.

Meanwhile, Kurashiki…

“Nya, nya, nya…!”

Too specialized in offense, her defense was, as always, paper-thin. One counterpunch, and she was down for the count.

Her whole body flushed with heat, her large cat-like eyes brimming with embarrassment.

I’m the one who wants to cry, you idiot.

Alone, I couldn’t instantly come up with the perfect words for this situation.

The best I could muster was:

“…This’ll make for a summer memory, right?”

Pouring water on a burning stone.

Igniting Kurashiki’s face.

“~~~~~! That didn’t happen! Forget it, forget it, FORGET IT~~~~~!!!”

Like a tantruming child, Kurashiki pounded my chest with soft thumps.

Here’s hoping this becomes a funny story at some girls’ night someday.

A dark history, though.

SS⑧: The Two Poster Girls Want to Serve a Lone Customer

On the day of the cultural festival, familiar customers flock to our class’s event: a maid café.

The two star poster girls of our usual café, Koino-san and Shirahoshi, are here.

While suppressing the urge to say, “It’s a maid café, so don’t make me serve,” I arrange the soufflé cake sets they ordered on the table.

Right now, we’re not acquaintances but server and customers. It’s not ideal to ignore other guests or chat excessively, mixing personal and professional matters. So, minimal conversation is preferable.

It’s definitely not because I find it troublesome or don’t want to deal with them.

DEFINITELY.

“Enjoy your meal.”

“Wait a second!”

“Huh?”

Just as I’m about to fade into the background, Shirahoshi grabs my arm firmly.

Our café has a no-touching policy, you know.

“What’s up?”

“You haven’t cast the spell to make it delicious yet!”

She points excitedly at a section of the menu, saying, “This one, this one!” I take a look, and sure enough, it reads: “For every master or lady who orders a drink, the maid will gift you a spell to make it delicious☆.”

I see, I see.

“Shirahoshi.”

“Yes!”

“Do you see me as some pervert in a maid outfit?”

“I’d rather receive the service, so I do see you in one!”

Go to an eye doctor right now.

I shoot an SOS glance at Koino-san, saying, “They’re turning me into a pervert.” But Koino-san seems eager to join in on making me the pervert.

“It’s a special festival, so could you humor us just this once?”

“I have to cast a spell for you too, huh…”

“Blowing on the drink to cool it down would work too~♪”

You ordered an iced tea, though.

The festival is still long, and I’d rather not burn all my energy on just these two.

I’ll skip the Dacho Club-style antics like, “Don’t you dare push it!” or “Who’s gonna do it? Fine, I will.”

That leaves me with one option. I pick up the cup of hot cocoa Shirahoshi ordered.

Resisting the urge to chant “Lariho!” or “Merazoma,” I say:

“BE DELICIOUS.”

The epitome of a curt response.

With normal customers, this would likely lead to a complaint or even a fist.

But this is Shirahoshi.

“Woooow…!”

It’s like she’s staring at a million-dollar night view. She gazes dreamily at the cup I handed her.

Then, she takes a sip of the still-steaming cocoa.

The moment she swallows, her expression melts. It’s as if heart marks are bursting out of her entire body.

“This is the best cocoa I’ve ever had… No, the best drink I’ve ever had…♪”

“It’s just 298-yen powdered cocoa from a bulk supermarket.”

“With love, any drink becomes delicious!”

Shirahoshi, is there love in that?

If she asks for a refill, I’ll make her try it with soy sauce.

For Koino-san, it’s not about the taste but the fact that grumpy old me cast the spell. She even claps for me, saying, “Well done~♪”

What am I, a toddler?

Their desires know no bounds. The two of them get increasingly excited, scheming to make the male “maid” perform all sorts of services listed on the menu.

“Hey, Arisu-chan, it says we can take a photo with the maid! Should we get one with all three of us later?♪”

“Absolutely yes! One with all three, one with you and the others, and—oh! A two-shot with just me and Haruichi-san, please, please! And also, a solo shot of Haruichi-san, please, please, please!”

“There’s a service where you can sing with your favorite maid, so we should do that too~♪”

“Ahh… To hear Haruichi-san’s live voice again is like a dream…♪ Oh! It says no filming, but what about recording? I’d love to use it as my alarm!”

Am I an idol or something?

“Do your best, Haruichi-kun♪” “Please, Haruichi-san!”

“…”

I burned so many calories after this.