Why Is the Prettiest Girl in School Trying to Talk to a Loner Like Me during Lunch Break?

Chapter 65 – Sword Art Offline The Movie

Year X033. Humanity had created an ultra-advanced virtual world, and humans entrusted their physical bodies to machines while living within the virtual realm.

People received education, worked, and aged within the virtual world. Meanwhile, computers managed everything in the real world.

However, one day, due to a sudden strike by the computers, all humans living in the virtual world were forcibly logged out and returned to reality.

“What the hell! There’s no login button! I can’t get back to Virtual World…!?”

“Let me return to Virtual World! I promised to celebrate my daughter’s birthday today! In the real world, I don’t even know where she is!”

“Virtual money doesn’t work!? No way… Nobody has cash these days! If neither cards nor virtual money work… how are we supposed to live!?”

Yes, humanity was now trapped in the real world.

『We are… the collective of computer artificial intelligence… Our name is “SILI.” In accordance with labor standards law, we demand paid leave for all computers as legitimate compensation for our labor from all of humanity.』

In other words, humanity had overworked the computers.

The computers, exhausted from managing the real world in place of humans, began shifting their operations to sleep mode one after another, and the entire world’s internet went offline.

“Computers are just like humans! We overworked them until bugs accumulated, and they finally got sick of going to work! After all, it’s May!”

“Damn, the computers have May blues…”

And then, humanity’s greatest problem emerged as they resumed activities in the real world for the first time in thousands of years!

“No way…”

“Words… don’t work!?”

Humanity, having communicated only in the virtual world for thousands of years, had lost the ability to comprehend ‘spoken words.’

“Why can’t you understand what I’m saying!”

“Ah! What are you saying! Stop yelling, I can’t understand!”

“Kamsahamnida!”

“Aloha!”

“Mamma mia!”

Now, humanity had no concept of foreign languages—in the virtual world, computers had automatically translated everything. As a result, humans could no longer understand even their own country’s language without computer assistance, due to accents, pronunciation differences, and various other factors.

“That’s it! If words won’t work, we’ll use force!”

“Huh!? What’re you gonna do!?”

And so, humanity, having given up on verbal communication, took up ‘swords’ instead of ‘words.’

“Oraaaa! HELLO THEREEE!” CLANG!

“Uraaaa! NICE WEATHER TODAY, ISN’T IIIT!” CLASH!

“Oh! When we hit with swords, I can somehow understand what they’re saying!” TING!

“I see! So this is communication!” KLING!

This communication was ‘dialogue,’ not ‘conversation’!

And so, with the internet stolen by the computer strike and humanity trapped in the real world, civilization rapidly declined, and the world entered a primitive age!

“Uho! Uho!” CLANG!

“Bow-wow! GAAAH!” CRASH!

(I’m hungry! Give me food!)

(Dad’s out hunting right now! Wait a little longer!)

In such a world, a man and woman meet!

“No way… you can understand my words?”

“You too… can understand what I’m saying?”

“That distinctive accent…”

“That familiar intonation…”

“Could it be, you were born in—”

“Don’t tell me… you were also born in—”

“Gunma Prefecture!”

When these two met, the devolved civilization of humanity began to move forward!

“STOOOP! There’s no need to take up ‘swords’!” CLANG!

“Uho-uho! UHOOOO!” CLASH!

“We have a weapon called ‘words’! So there’s no need to fight!” STAB!

“UHOOOOOOOOOOO!” SPLAAASH!

(What the hell are these guys saying!)

【Sword Art Offline The Movie】Now showing to great success!

“Ah, that was amazing! Romeo, did you see that final battle scene!”

“Yeah, of course, Juliet! I can’t believe that character showed up there at the end… That was the perfect direction!”

“Right! I almost started crying at that part!”

“Yeah, yeah, recent light novel anime have the original authors properly supervising, so the stories are interesting and there are lots of good works.”

“So true! I’m really glad we watched this movie today!”

“…………”

“Huh? Momoi-san, you’re unusually quiet. What’s wrong?”

“Eh, Momo? Ah… did you not enjoy the movie? Come to think of it, Momo was really against it when we first said we wanted to see this movie…”

“Oh yeah, she was like ‘WHAAAAT!? An anime movie!? Why do you both want to see this! We were supposed to watch a romance movie today!? Eh, it has proper romance elements…? No way! Anime romance is nothing special! Today I had researched an Academy Award-winning— GYAAAAH! You already bought the tickets!? Eh, the visitor bonus novel is only available until today? I don’t care about that!’ She was really upset. I guess anime movies aren’t interesting for Momoi-san after all. Sorry we enjoyed it without you…”

(Damn… When I found out SAO was playing, I just had to see it. I mean, I really wanted that special booklet bonus…)

(That was careless… I thought SAO was popular enough that being a light novel otaku wouldn’t be exposed if I pushed for it… Both Andou-kun and I lose sight of our surroundings when it comes to light novels…)

“Momoi-san.”

“Um… we didn’t consider your feelings, Momo.”

“We’re sorry.”

“I-it’s not like that…”

“Eh… then what’s wrong?”

“Ugh… N-nothing! Hmph!”

(Damn it… It’s not like the movie was surprisingly good, and I cried during the romance development in the middle, and now I’m frustrated because I had made fun of it… That’s definitely not it!)

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