When the person I used to admire, turned out to be a Yandere! - Chapter 73- Changes?
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- Chapter 73- Changes?
[Haruki’s POV:]
Should I have waited for some days before telling her that I know everything?
The fact that Emiko-san has knowledge of her past life and also that, her love for me originates from her guilt toward me.
The timeline I saw in my ‘dreams’ was not just a possible reality rather it was something that had happened between me and Emiko-san in our last lives.
All those dreams which I recently have been having were not nonsensical. They all were signs that I had lived another life with Emiko-san. Those were the flashes that I was watching of my previous life.
And now, I have a clear view of everything.
The reason why, out of nowhere, Harada Emiko became affectionate toward me. Why does Emiko-san know about my likes and dislikes? Why did she know about my sister’s illness and use that as a bargain to form that contract with me? Why did she have to take antidepressants…why she used to look at me with guilt some of the time…
…I know the answer to every single question.
“Emiko-san…why didn’t you tell me about it?”
It has been some minutes since I woke up and confessed to her, and as such, Emiko-san has somehow calmed down and understood the changes I have adapted.
Her eyes remained listless like she had lost all her hopes.
Her lips moved amidst the ensuing silence and her answer resonated in my ears, “As Haru-kun already know…I have done some of the most hideous things to Haru-kun…I have used your kindness and disposed of you when I attained success. While my happiness always remained your priority, I never cared about yours….even recalling those days makes my heart heavy…I couldn’t possibly have told you all this…”
Her remorse was seeping through her lips and was carried with her words. I had never seen this side of Emiko-san before….she seemed so guilty, so lost…that a part of me just wanted to get up and embrace her.
However, there was something I wanted to know…something that only Emiko-san could tell me.
“Back then…why did you never get into any serious relationship?”
Not only mine, but I have seen many days from Emiko-san’s perspective as well. And apart from the platonic relationship she had with Rei, she didn’t come in contact with anyone romantically.
Emiko-san jerked a little, hearing my words.
I thought that there might be some reason why she couldn’t confess. Maybe, I didn’t see everything in those memories and maybe she was seeing someone…?
However her response was different from what I expected,
“…I know you won’t believe me when I say this but, Haru-kun…a part of me liked you ever since we first had dinner together. Your kindness and gentle behavior touched my heart. A part of me always wanted to respond to your feelings…but all my life I was so occupied by my ambition that I thought, that once I accomplished my goal, I would have Haru-kun all for me.”
“I took Haru-kun for granted and believed that, when I finally get settled in life, I will come to get you…however, I got so blinded by the limelight that I delayed and delayed….and…a-and…Haru-kun left me!”
She broke down.
All my complicated emotions aside, but seeing her wailing like this I was suddenly reminded of that Emiko-san, who broke down in the washroom after receiving the news of my death.
I hugged her from the side and held her firmly in my arms.
For some obvious reasons, seeing her cry like this…seeing her in pain and wailing, I just feel unable to hold myself. It felt like, if I didn’t console her, I might just lose all my motives in life.
….in a way, this feeling was what one could say is ‘obsessive’.
Emiko-san held my arm and cried. She cried a lot. Tears never stopped trailing down her cheeks. The room was filled with all the regret and agony she had been harboring all these years. She wasn’t able to apologize despite me being always in front of her.
Some minutes ago I was only thinking about ‘my past’, ‘my grief’ and ‘my loss’…but now that I was holding the girl in my arms, I realized how much she must have suffered. How much she must have loved me that…
….she didn’t think twice before ending her life.
*****
[After some minutes]
Fortunately, I was able to calm her down and gave her some water to cool down.
We both were lying down on the bed with Emiko-san’s head resting on my chest and my hand softly caressing her back.
Surprisingly no one entered the room even though Emiko-san was crying so loud. However, I was thankful that I was able to spend some alone time with her and sort things out.
….well, there is more than one thing I need to ask and discuss with her but for now, I didn’t want to elevate her burden.
“You must have hated my past self, right?”
Hearing her hoarse tone, I refocused on her.
I took a brief moment to collect my thoughts before answering her sincerely.
“…it was sad that you left me, but I never detested you, Emiko-san.”
She inhaled sharply before propping her chin on my chest and looking into my eyes.
“Haru-kun…I know this is selfish of me to ask this after what I have done to you…but…there won’t be changes between us, right?”
More than curious, she was hoping to hear a favorable response from me.
However, “No, Emiko-san…not everything will remain the same between us.”
With a smile lifting the edges of my lips, I cupped her soft cheeks before telling her,
“Emiko-san…I am breaking up with you.”
******
A/N:- Drop a-ehh?! What did he just say?! B-b-break up?!
Fuck…I shouldn’t have read depressing Korean stories. Haah, well.