When I Was Rejected and Returned Home, My Childhood Friend, Who Should Have Been Distant, Was in My Room - Chapter 1.1: The Lonely Way Home (1)

Chapter 1.1: The Lonely Way Home (1)

“I’m sorry.”

It was after school, behind the school building, where the fresh spring air could be felt. Under a huge tree that seemed like it might have a legend of matchmaking tied to it, she bowed so beautifully I couldn’t help but stare.

“…Huh?”

What did she just say…? My brain froze in shock at the unexpected words, and I responded in reflex. When she slowly raised her head, her eyes looked apologetic, and she wouldn’t meet mine at all.

“I just… don’t see you that way right now, Masaki-kun…”

She was trying to soften the blow, but it was clearly a rejection. She called me differently than usual, and her voice had a tone I had never heard before. Leaving me unable to say anything back, she gave a sad smile and moved to her final words.

“So, can we still be friends?”

Even though I was being rejected, my first thought was, “She’s cute.” Even though she was saying something that hurt, my eyes moved from hers to her hair, then from her hair to her mouth.

Her big, glossy eyes were like agate, her silky black hair, and those slightly damp… pink lips. My brain didn’t even try to understand what those small lips were saying.

But my body seemed to get the message. My breathing grew shallow, and I felt like there wasn’t enough oxygen in my body. I tried to breathe deeply, but all I could manage were weird sounds, like wheezing.

It wasn’t just my breathing that was off. I wanted to run away, but my legs were stiff like sticks and wouldn’t move. I tried to make a face to say something, but all I could do was a creepy, awkward smile.

Still, I couldn’t let it end like this. I couldn’t let this be the last image of me that she remembered.

At least look cool when you walk away, Masaki Munechika…!

“Th-thank you… for everything…!”

My lame voice forced the words out, and at the same time, strength returned to my frozen legs, and I ran off.

“Ah, wait—!”

She said something as I left, but I didn’t have the strength to listen. I had misunderstood. I got full of myself. I was the only one who fell in love and ruined everything. I looked so pathetic I couldn’t even cry. Goodbye, my feelings of love.

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“Come on, don’t let it get you down. Cheer up.”

At a family restaurant a bit away from school, the place was lively with students and families. But at one table, it felt like a funeral.

“There’s nothing left to cheer up with…”

“Hey, want my Real Gold?”

“If an energy drink could fix this, life’d be easy…”

Still, I grabbed the offered glass and drank it all in one go. A wave of carbonation hit my throat hard.

“Ugh.”

“Whoa, you okay?”

He wiped up the juice I spilled on the table. The yellow soda slowly soaked into the napkin.

“This sucks. I want to crawl into a hole and disappear…”

“Don’t get too down. Just move on.”

“Move on! I can’t…”

“This is bad.”

The one trying to cheer me up was my best friend, Shogo Suzukawa. When he heard I was going to confess, he said we’d have a celebration. Well, it turned into a pity party… Man, even saying that hurts.

“Don’t worry about it, Masamune. There are tons of girls out there.”

“Ugh.”

Just being called Masamune hit me hard again. My full name is Masaki Munechika, shortened to Masamune. Now, only two people call me that. A memory suddenly came back—when she first called me “Masamune-kun,” she looked so shy, but she was definitely happy. She kept saying my name over and over with a smile. God, she was really cute… but the cutest was probably when she was reading. No, but then again—

“Hey, Masamune! Come back to reality!”

“Huh!”

Shogo’s words snapped me out of it. What the hell was I thinking just now…?

“You’re pretty far gone. Well, guess it makes sense…”

“I’ve got nothing to say to that.”

Even though I know she rejected me, the memories of her kept flashing back like a strobe light. It was even worse than before I confessed. Maybe realizing comforting me wouldn’t help anymore, Shogo let out a small sigh.

“Still, I can’t believe she turned you down. You two looked great together.”

“So you thought so too…?”

Hearing that made me kind of happy. I still wanted to believe her rejection was a prank, and she’d pop up from under the table or behind me with a huge sign or something.

But life’s not that kind. There’s no room under the table, and families are sitting at the ones behind and in front of us. The more I think about it, the heavier reality gets.

“But still, you were brave, Masamune.”

“About what?”

“She said you could still be friends, and you turned her down, right?”

“Well, yeah…”

“You liked her that much, but you still managed to say no.”

If we couldn’t go back to how things were, I figured we should return to those early days at the start of the year when we didn’t know each other. At least, that’s what I decided before I confessed.

“Hey, did I really make the right choice? Wouldn’t it have been better to stay friends?”

“Don’t start doubting yourself now. You did the right thing.”

“Ugh, Shogo…”

“Don’t cling to me. That’s gross.”

“Hey, don’t hit a guy when he’s heartbroken.”