When I Was Presumed Dead, They Became Unhinged Unknowingly - Chapter 42

I was spending my days terrified and anxious; my heart was reaching its limits. Every time my father moved, my body would twitch in response.

Whenever I heard my mother’s screams, I would cover my ears and my mind would go blank. Why am I in this situation? Why did I have to be born?

No, I wonder if I am alive in the first place. Am I living while dying? I had to ponder that at a very young age.

Once in the past, I said something to Mom,

“Mom, let’s run away.”

When I told her that, she looked at me with a black stare, and said, “No, we can’t. That is the one thing we can’t do.” As a young boy, I could not read other people’s emotions, so I did not know what my mother was thinking at that time.

Every day that was hell for me would end one day.

By my hands.

______________

The day before that day.

Again, I was violently beaten, and my mother was slapped and kicked for defending me.

At that moment, something in my heart broke.

Until this moment, I had barely recognized my father as a father, but when something broke in my heart, he became nothing more than an ugly monster. Even his words sounded like a different language………no, they weren’t even words. They only sounded like groans.

I have to kill it.

If I don’t kill it, I might die. I will be killed, what should I do? What should I do? What should I do? What should I do? 

I had to protect myself, so I was desperate.

It was when my mother left for the hospital to heal yesterday’s wounds. At that time, I thought I had to kill that monster. I went to the monster, who was still snoring loudly. I had a knife in my hand. If I killed it, my mother and I would be free. Murderous intent dominated my thoughts.

Will Mom praise me? She would surely praise me. We will be free. She’d praise me for saving her. It will be alright. I was sure I would be fine. It couldn’t be helped. After all, if I didn’t kill it, it’d kill me.

I opened the door to the room where the monster is sleeping. I approach the sleeping monster. I stared at the knife in my right hand.

When I thought of what had happened up until now, and what was going to follow, I became clearly abnormal, and my breathing became shallow with excitement.

It will be alright; it will be alright; it will be alright.

I stabbed my right hand into the monster.

The monster woke up with the pain of a knife deeply stuck in its chest.

“??!!”

Into the monster that woke up, I, again and again, stabbed the knife.

“Sa………..to-ru”

When the monster spoke human words, my thoughts finally returned to normal, and I gradually calmed down.

“Sa, toru……Thank-you.” 

He said, and Dad became limp, and never spoke again.