The Witch and Her Companion: I'm Just a Normal High School Student, but I Became the Familiar of the Highest-Ranked Witch. Also, It Seems I'm the Only Guy in the Witch Organization I Joined

Chapter 66: Shampoo and Wife

[Tatsumori Haruto]

Today marks the seventh day since I was thrown into this underground prison. And something absolutely absurd just happened.

“Oi, newbie! How about you take a damn bath already!?”

“Haa… If I could, I would, you know… You do realize there’s no bath in my cell, right, Ys?”

“What the hell are you on about!? I just got out of mine, dumbass!!”

“…Hah?”

Life in the underground prison was slowly improving. Scarlet’s cooking was getting tastier, and my training with Ys was making me undeniably stronger.

But the lack of a bath was a serious drawback. Even after getting beaten to a pulp by Ys, covered in blood, sweat, and dirt, the best I could do was wipe myself down with a damp towel.

And since the last bath I had was in a hot spring, I was absolutely craving a proper soak.

Yet—Ys had just casually dropped a bombshell.

“My cell has a bath, you know. If you wanted to use it, you could’ve just said so.”

“That’s the first time I’m hearing about this!?”

So, wait a minute—while I’ve been scrubbing myself down with cold water every day, Ys has been enjoying warm showers in his private bath?

“Oi, newbie, don’t give me that look! You got no right to be mad when I’m telling you now!”

“…Ys.”

“W-What?”

“I’m borrowing your bath.”

It was fine. I had known for a while now that this was just the kind of girl Ys was.

Scarlet was almost too kind, which only made Ys’s selfishness stand out more.

But right now, all that mattered was the bath. I needed to bathe. I needed to wash myself clean under hot water.

Stepping into Ys’s cell for the first time was a surreal experience.

It wasn’t a prison cell at all—it was a damn luxury suite.

My own cell was already relatively well-maintained for a prison, but this? This was on an entirely different level.

A canopy bed. A refrigerator bigger than the one back home. Bookshelves lined with books from wall to wall.

And to the right of the entrance—a door leading to a grand bathroom, complete with a bathtub.

Oh, and a top-of-the-line drum washing machine right next to it. One of those fancy models that dry clothes at the push of a button.

What the hell. Meanwhile, I’d been handwashing my clothes and hanging them to dry.

Whoever locked Ys up in here was definitely spoiling her way too much.

***

The shower was absolute bliss.

As the sweat and grime washed away, so did the exhaustion. I even filled the tub, ensuring I’d be fully refreshed for afternoon training.

I had just recently mastered crystallizing my magic, and now I was working on shaping it. I had managed to form a rod-like structure, but I was still far from forging it into a sword.

“…Uh, which one’s the shampoo?”

“The white bottle on the right. The black one’s conditioner, so don’t mix ‘em up!”

“Ah, thanks.”

The shampoo looked fancy. Way too fancy. So this was what Ys used… No wonder her hair was so damn silky—…Huh?

“…Wait, Ys!? What the hell are you doing in here!? You drunk or what!?”

“I’m sober, dumbass! And this is my bath!”

“Th-That doesn’t mean you can just hop in with me!?”

“Quit chirping like a damn bird! I was just gonna wash my disciple’s back for him!”

“O-Ohhh… I appreciate the thought, but why are you dressed like that!? Put on some clothes!!”

Ys had barged into the bathroom in nothing but underwear.

Considering she always wore a black dress shirt, black pants, and knee-high boots—an outfit that left zero skin exposed—seeing this much of her was… overwhelming.

Her chest was barely contained by her underwear, practically spilling out.

“What are you even saying, dumbass!? If I wore clothes in the bath, they’d get soaked!!”

“No, what are you saying!? You don’t need to wash my back, just get out!!”

“…You really wanna keep arguing? ‘Cause I could turn you into charcoal, y’know?”

“…Ha, haha… I-I’m very sorry…”

The sheer bloodlust radiating from behind me made it painfully clear—I had no choice but to comply.

Trying to keep my expression as neutral as possible, I focused on not looking in Ys’s direction.

But then, her pale hands reached past me to grab the body soap.

Crap…! Even if I shut my eyes, the mental image of her half-dressed figure was burned into my brain. Stay calm. Stay calm…!!

Just as I was desperately trying to regain my composure, a soft, fluffy lather pressed against my back.

Ys’s hands, covered in fine bubbles, slowly traced along my shoulder blades, gliding across my skin.

…Where the hell was the body brush? Or a washcloth!? This was bad… This was way too erotic.

As I was lost in thought, Ys, who had been diligently scrubbing my back, suddenly brought up an unusual topic—one that was quite unlike her.

“—Oi, newbie. You got someone you’re in love with?”

“…Wha—What’s with the sudden question?”

“Just answer. Or I’ll burn you.”

“…Yeah, I do.”

In the end, I still liked Fuu. When Ys asked me that, the first thing that popped into my head was Fuu’s face.

Even after everything that happened, I still wanted to believe in her. That must’ve been some kind of mistake. I had no clue what was really going on, but Fuu—she…

I knew it was foolish of me. But even so, I just couldn’t bring myself to doubt her. I guess that’s what they call the weakness of being in love… Maybe loving someone means being able to trust them unconditionally.

“I see. Well, I kinda figured as much.”

“…Wait, really?”

That was surprising. I never expected Ys to understand anything about love. She was like the embodiment of booze and violence, yet she actually had a normal human sense for this stuff? Huh. I was honestly impressed.

“Yeah. So, what if that person doesn’t think you’re half bad either?”

“Eh…? Well, I’d be happy, and I’d wanna go out with her, but… Wait, what’s with all these questions?”

“I’m the one asking the questions here. Just shut up and answer. So, newbie—do you care if she’s a virgin or not?”

“…V-Vir—?! Wh-What the hell kind of question is that!?”

“I’ll burn you.”

I felt the heat of roaring flames behind me. Crap. This was some next-level sexual harassment. And power harassment, too.

That said… I’d never really thought about whether Fuu was a virgin or not. Of course, if I were her first, I’d be happy. It’d be an honor, really.

But even if she wasn’t, that wouldn’t make me love her any less.

People say men want to be a woman’s first, and women want to be a man’s last.

But I’m a guy, and yet, I’d be fine just being Fuu’s last.

“I don’t care whether she’s, um… experienced or not. What matters is how we feel about each other.”

Even as I said it, I felt like I was spouting some embarrassingly corny line. But dodging the question would’ve felt like I was lying to myself about my feelings for Fuu.

“Heh, not bad. You’re not half bad-looking either… If you’re that serious about it, guess I got no choice—”

“I’ll take you as my wife.”

“…Huh?”

Wait. Something’s wrong. Something’s way off. Wife? What the hell? I had no idea what was going on anymore—not just the conversation, but the whole situation, with her washing my back and all.

“Well, with that settled, even Abyss wouldn’t be able to execute my wife, so at least you don’t have to worry about getting killed!”

“…Uh, Ys?”

“Ah, don’t even start. You were gonna say there’d be obstacles in the way, right? Don’t worry. Anyone who’s got a problem with it—I’ll just incinerate them with the rest of the trash!”

Apparently, when she said “wife,” she meant me.

And somehow, somewhere along the way, she’d come to the conclusion that I was in love with her.

This was bad. Really bad.

“W-Wait, hold on, this is all happening too fast—I can’t even process it—”

How the hell was I supposed to clear up this misunderstanding?

‘Ys? I don’t even have you on my radar. What the hell are you misunderstanding?’

If I said that, I’d definitely end up as burnt garbage.

But trying to hint at it in a roundabout way wouldn’t work either—Ys wasn’t exactly the type to pick up on subtlety.

“Tch, what’re you panicking for? Whatever. I’m done washing your back, so I’m heading out. Get your thoughts straight before you come out, Haruto.”

It was the first time she’d called me by name.

And yet, I couldn’t be happy about it at all.

She was already acting like we were dating.