The Way to Absolute Dungeon Administration – There Is No Reason To Meet With the Opponent!

Volume 01 Chapter 23: Taking It Easy

I’m barely holding onto my sanity. I must be one step away from enlightenment.

“…Please, I don’t know how to use it either.”

“Please.”

“I’ll try hard to learn!!”

Asrin and Filia are fine. No issues. Just kid-sized bodies.

It’s like an adult supervising kids in the bath.

But Labiris has those two melons.

Calm down, I’m not a lolico◯. I’m a proper gentleman.

“Sorry, Onii-san, but you’re the expert, so please handle these three. We’re busy with ourselves.”

Ratsu says, pushing the trio toward me.

The others are, of course, naked too.

Ugh, fine, treating this like a job will keep me sane.

“Alright, no point being shy. You’ll catch a cold like that.”

I say, removing the towel hiding my groin. I’m not an exhibitionist.

It’s just that acting embarrassed makes it worse for everyone watching. It’s pathetic.

I’ve got nothing to hide, so I’ll just be confident.

“Wow~ Onii-san, switching to work mode, huh… No fun to tease~ Well, like you said, catching a cold’s no good, so whatever.”

“Sorry. We’ll save that for another time. First, you wash your body before getting in the bath.”

I turn the shower faucet.

“Amazing, turn this for hot water, and the blue one for cold…”

Led by Eris, everyone lines up, turning faucets and gasping in surprise.

“Adjust it to a comfortable temperature. Rinse your body first, then rub soap on your towel to lather up and wash. Don’t wash your hair yet.”

“Huh? You don’t use soap for hair?”

Milly, her large chest covered in bubbles, throws me a question.

“Hair’s for shampoo and conditioner. Wash your body with soap first. Rinse it off, then shampoo’s the blue bottle, conditioner’s pink. Shampoo first… I’ll demonstrate, so wait a sec.”

Asrin, Filia, and Labiris are washing themselves.

But they’re kids, so they’re missing spots.

Oh, right, you’re supposed to wash your hair first, aren’t you?

I’ll tell them to do that starting tomorrow.

“Asrin, clean behind your ears like this. Filia, make sure to scrub your soles. Labiris… your chest is big, so it’s hard to see, but wash it thoroughly…”

Am I harassing Labiris?

“Like this?”

“Okay!”

“…Help me, my boobs are heavy. I need support. Not enough arms.”

…This is legal. No, it’s just helping, so it’s fine.

I hold up her two melons with both hands, and Labiris washes underneath.

What is this? It’s a perk, but I feel like I’m done for in every sense.

“Alright, rinse thoroughly.”

After confirming the three are clean, I check the others.

“Onii-san, we’re good too.”

Ratsu and the rest waited a bit for us.

“Okay, shampoo first. Think of it as soap for hair. It cleans dirt off, then conditioner cares for it. You’ll get what ‘care’ means when you use it.”

“…Got it. I’ll try.”

Kaya replies and starts washing her hair, the others following.

“Asrin and the others might struggle, so I’ll do it.”

“Please.”

“Thank you.”

“…Please.”

I wash their hair one by one.

“Wow~ Feels nice. Smells good.”

“It’s weird, but I’m happy.”

“…My hair’s so smooth… Amazing.”

The trio’s reactions.

The others, meanwhile…

“Onii-san, this is incredible!! Let’s sell it!! It’ll sell!!”

“Wow, it’s amazing.”

“…It’s great, but I feel like I’m being ruined.”

Ratsu, Eris, and Milly’s reactions.

The beastman group…

“Ugh, all I can say is amazing.”

“First time for me!!”

“…My hair’s so smooth… Feels good.”

Tori, Riel, and Kaya seem pleased too.

But now’s the main event!! It’s a bath, after all—an open-air bath!!

“Alright, here’s the real deal. We’re entering the open-air bath. It can be hot, so don’t jump in.”

Three of them freeze. They were about to jump, weren’t they?

“No splashing either. It’s forbidden. Enter slowly. Asrin and the others, you’re short, so use the steps over there.”

“Got it. Let’s go, you two.”

“Yeah!!”

“Wait up.”

The three hold hands and head to the open-air bath. I’ve gotta follow.

As we enter, the group lets out exclamations.

“Whoa~ What’s this, Onii-san? My body’s melting.”

“It’s not melting.”

“But it’s amazing. Just soaking in hot water.”

Everyone seems satisfied with the open-air bath… but the real kicker’s coming.

“Ratsu, can you watch these three for a bit?”

“Sure, but where you going?”

“The true essence of an open-air bath.”

I return with sake and juice.

“Oh~ Onii-san, a fancy bath and now something even fancier~ I’m marrying you!! I’ve decided!! I don’t care if I’m not the first wife, I’ll be a concubine!!”

“Calm down, Ratsu. An open-air bath is for floating a tray with sake, enjoying the scenery or stars.”

I float a tray with sake and distribute it.

For Asrin and the others, it’s juice, my call.

“This… Is it okay to do this?”

“It’s strangely calming.”

Eris and Milly relax with sake and the starry sky.

It’s a dungeon, but I made it so you can see the night sky.

A dirt ceiling would be depressing.

“Even a warrior like me gets moments like this…”

“It’s weird for me too. Not bad, though.”

“…Feels nice.”

Tori, Riel, and Kaya are chilling too.

“Yuki-san, thank you so much…”

“I’m glad Yuki-san took us in…”

“…I misjudged you, Yuki. Sorry.”

The kid trio’s crying their eyes out with gratitude.

Getting thanked and cried over for this?

…This world’s not normal if this is a big deal. Gotta keep going.

While soaking, voices come from the men’s bath.

“Hey, we’re getting out first!! Chilling in the changing room!!”

“Got it, we’ll be out soon. Wait up!!”

I reply and look at the group.

“You can come back anytime, but let’s get out. You’ll get dizzy otherwise.”

“Dizzy? What’s that, Onii-san?”

Ratsu looks at me curiously.

“It’s like a sickness from staying in hot water too long. Like getting lightheaded.”

“Oh~ Moderation, huh? Fair enough. Let’s come back later.”

Everyone gets out of the bath. So many boobs…

“Wring out your towels and dry off before heading to the changing room. Don’t drip everywhere.”

“““Okay!”””

And so, our bath time ends.

“Dinner time!! Yuki’s got that covered, right?”

“Yeah, this way.”

I lead Mauve and the others.

“What about sashimi? That stuff’s good.”

“Yeah, it went great with the sake Yuki gave us last time.”

“Raw fish was shocking, but it’s tasty once you’re used to it.”

“Yeah, I’ve got it. The women might not like raw fish, so don’t worry if they leave it.”

We arrive at the banquet hall.

“Whoa, this is amazing, Onii-san! This is a feast!?”

Ratsu gawks at the individual trays.

“Nah, this is normal here.”

“I’m swearing my loyalty to you, Onii-san!! I’ll follow you anywhere!!”

“Just eat. There’s chopsticks, but if you can’t use them, grab a spoon or fork.”

Everyone digs into the Japanese food.

“Delicious… Never seen this before, but it’s amazing.”

“…Feels like my common sense is slipping away.”

“Soy sauce, huh? Delicious!!”

“This takikomi gohan is great too!!”

“…Aburaage, the ultimate food.”

Amid the chatter, the kid trio approaches me.

“Um, sorry!! I can’t finish it…”

“My stomach’s full, sorry.”

“…You use those sticks so skillfully.”

“Asrin, Filia, don’t worry, it’s adult portions. Labiris, these are called chopsticks. They’re handy once you get used to them.”

Oh, Mauve and the guys are already partying.

“You’re probably tired, so let’s talk details tomorrow. Eris, here’s the key. Next room. There’s ten futons, so lay them out and sleep. We’ll meet here tomorrow to talk.”

“Ah, got it.”

“…Where are you going, Yuki?”

Labiris asks.

“To my room, obviously.”

“…I’m coming too. Okay?”

“Hmm, Eris, what do you think?”

“No issue. Even if you make a move on Labiris, it’s fine.”

“…Let’s pretend I didn’t hear that. Fine, Labiris, this way.”

“I’m coming too!!”

“Labiris-chan, I’m going too.”

Guess I’m stuck babysitting the kid trio.

On the way to my room, Labiris speaks up.