The Way to Absolute Dungeon Administration – There Is No Reason To Meet With the Opponent! - Volume 01 Chapter 17: NDK in All Sorts of Ways?

Volume 01 Chapter 17: NDK in All Sorts of Ways?

T/N: NDK is an internet slang, for simplicity’s sake, let’s just say it’s WTF!? So, WTF in all sort of ways.

Side: Selaria Nau Rocheur

Never thought I’d end up on a stage for a play.

I don’t like calling it a farce, but for Elju’s sake, it’s no problem.

My sister is my treasure, after all.

My turn’s coming up soon. Three monitors are in front of me. One shows that shitty old man, one shows the soldiers in the dungeon, and the last one…

“Loire-sama!! Emergency!! Return to the castle!! The king and princess have been assassinated!! The castle’s in chaos!!”

“What!? The king…!? And the princess!? Understood, I’ll gather the troops and return immediately!! Sorry, but I need you to send word that Loire is heading back to the capital!!”

“Leave it to me, I’ll go now!!”

Yes, the last one shows Loire, waiting outside the dungeon.

Yuki used [Designated Protection] on small animals to scout outside the dungeon… So cunning.

It hits me—he’s a completely different kind of powerhouse than me.

But Yuki’s plan goes further. He’s deliberately showing this footage to the soldiers inside the dungeon.

Unaware, Loire smirks at his base camp after sending off the messenger. An aide approaches.

“Loire-sama, Rocheur is as good as ours now.”

“Indeed. Litea Holy Nation only needed Princess Elju eliminated, but that’s too simple. I need greater rewards for my cooperation!! This kingdom as my prize!!”

“What about the soldiers left in the dungeon?”

“Forget them. Left alone, they’ll die. Even if they join Princess Elju in there, it’s over. If they brazenly reach the capital, we’ll capture and execute them.”

“As foolish soldiers bewitched by the Dungeon Master?”

“Exactly, you get it!! Even if they team up, no way a princess makes it to the capital.”

“Oh? How so?”

“Heh heh heh, that’s a treat for later. Now, as planned, we’ve got good news. Things are about to get busy. Those left in the capital failed to prevent the king’s assassination. And despite heavy losses, I, Loire, heroically conquer the dungeon and return!!”

“The soldiers’ sacrifices were part of the plan, then. Your position in the capital is secure.”

“That’s right. Everything’s accounted for!!”

…Idiot. Didn’t expect him to spill it so openly.

But in a way, this is the perfect place to talk freely.

After all, the roughly 500 soldiers left are probably under Loire’s thumb.

“…Rocheur-ousama, how’re you feeling?”

“…Don’t rub it in…”

“Get your head straight before we get back, Selaria. I’m leaving the rest to you and Elju.”

Yuki looks at Elju and me.

We nod back.

Showtime.

“Listen, soldiers of Rocheur!! This is the truth!! You were just pawns in Loire’s scheme!! Your past actions won’t be held against you. Rather, I thank you for your loyalty!! Now, I, Selaria Nau Rocheur, and…”

“If you believe the words of Elju Lau Rocheur, raise your swords!!”

The other side of the monitor falls silent, but one soldier steps forward, raising his sword… My direct unit’s captain… Qual.

“My loyalty lies with Rocheur and Selaria-sama!!”

“““UOOOOHHH!!”””

In response, the soldiers roar and raise their swords.

“Qual, we’re coming there. Then we march to the capital and take Loire’s head!!”

“Understood!!”

Elju and I head to the soldiers’ location. There, the Royal Guard Captain… Ares Lester kneels, having entrusted his sword to Qual.

“Qual, what’s this?”

“Ares, the Royal Guard Captain, regrets failing to stop Loire’s plot and seeks punishment.”

“…Ares.”

“I’ll accept any punishment. I, who should’ve protected your father and sister, aided their deaths. Behead me here, I don’t care.”

“I won’t.”

“…Why…?”

“You heard Loire’s words. Yes, my father and sister—the king and princess—are likely dead. But the kingdom isn’t finished!! Ares… Why did you take up that sword!! Was it only for the king!?”

“It’s…”

“For the people, right? Protecting the kingdom, the king, means protecting the people too. If that resolve remains, take up your sword again, Ares!!”

“This sword… I swear to wield it for the kingdom, the princess, and the people!!”

Phew, managed to push through. I’m not good at speeches for that shitty old man.

“Wow, you’ve been on the battlefield, huh? That was cool.”

“Hm, Selaria’s grown this much?”

“Hehe, wanna be queen in my place?”

Ugh, I set it so only the castle folks’ voices come through for emergencies, but they’re annoying!!

Side: Aria Ras Rocheur

“Now, our turn?”

“Yes, Father.”

Selaria’s march report and news of the incident have arrived.

All that’s left is dealing with Loire.

Yes, we stopped the assassination, but letting Loire escape or make excuses was a risk, so we accepted a proposal.

“Never thought we’d fake our deaths.”

“But it’s effective. If we don’t catch Loire, it’ll leave trouble. If we do, even without a confession, we can pin any charge and execute him.”

As we talk, a soldier reports.

“Minister Loire has arrived!! Everything’s set as planned. But, Your Majesty, playing a corpse…”

He reports, looking worriedly at Father.

“Don’t worry. My sword arm’s still sharp despite my age. Loire’s no match for me alone!! So, how’s it look? Convincing corpse makeup?”

“Y-Yes!! A splendid death face!!”

“Hehe, a splendid death face, Father?”

“S-Sorry!! My apologies!!”

“Hmph, you’re no different, Aria. Now, I’ll play dead. Handle the rest.”

“Leave it to me!!”

The soldier leaves. He’ll go far, humoring our jokes.

“Sleeping with you like this… How long’s it been?”

“You’ve always been busy, Father.”

“In a way, we owe Yuki for this plan.”

“Indeed.”

Footsteps echo from the hall, and the door’s flung open.

“Your Majesty!! Princess Aria!!”

“C-Calm down, Minister Loire!!”

“No way I can stay calm!! …No, the king, like this…?”

Loire approaches, shouting.

My eyes are closed, so I can’t see, but what kind of face dares to show itself before us?

“…Sorry. Can you leave? I want to speak with the king one last time…”

“…Don’t do anything rash.”

Loire’s attendant leaves. He’ll be caught right after.

Silence envelops the room. Then, a stifled laugh.

“…Heh heh, Rocheur-ousama, you played right into my plans till the end. My deal with Litea Holy Nation’s done. That fake Saintess Elju is dead, and Rocheur’s royals are all gone. Even if Elju and Selaria return, I’ll handle them. Go to the afterlife together!!”

…He spills so easily, no need to explain to the other vassals.

I’d love to see the faces of the ministers in the next room.

“…Phew, am I getting old? Not killing you here, Loire.”

“Huh? R-Rocheur-ousama!?”

When I open my eyes, Father’s already swung his favorite sword.

Thud. Loire’s arm hits the carpet.

“AGHHH!! W-Why!?”

“No need to explain to you. Take him away!! Treat him enough to keep him alive.”

“Yes!!”

And just like that, Loire’s dragged off.

“No role for me, huh?”

I sit up.

“Don’t worry, the next part’s the main event.”

As Father speaks, the door opens again.

The soldier from before looks panicked.

“Report!! Among the troops Selaria-sama persuaded, there were Loire’s men!!”

“Hm, expected. Why so panicked?”

“Tch, during the march, someone drew a sword on Selaria-sama and Elju-sama. Selaria-sama’s unharmed, but…”

“…No way!?”

“E-Elju-sama was pierced by a sword… and died!!”

Now the incident’s spread. Time for the final touch.