The Reason Why I was Cheated on By My Girlfriend - Chapter 41-42

Look Only at Me

Kaguya Sakashita’s POV

I failed. My assumptions were too naïve.

This is the worst. This is absolutely not okay.

I should have avoided it, even if it meant pulling my tongue away.

Because of me, Haruki-san will suffer even more.

Realizing that—I feel genuinely happy.

Haruki-san loves Yua-san, but that’s not a bad thing. After all, the two of them have been together since they were little.

There is no way Haruki-san could hate Yua-san over a single incident.

Haruki-san accepted Yua-san.

Instead of labelling things that differ from his own understanding as ‘weird’, he is empathetic and tries to think from the other person’s perspective.

What a big-hearted person he is. I love him so much.

Haruki-san is someone who can truly understand others.

He never judges people based on selfish prejudices.

That’s why I can show him my true self.

I’m sure he will accept the real me.

But now isn’t the right time.

I’ll do it after I get closer to him.

I thought there was no need to rush.

I believed that I’ll be able to slowly overwrite all the memories that Haruki-san and Yua-san made together—the paths they walked together, the food they ate together, the places they visited together.

But I was wrong.

I underestimated the situation.

I need to separate them.

So, I took him to a place far away.

Because, I couldn’t bear to watch Haruki-san like that.

If I had left him with that pained expression on his face, I would have regretted it for the rest of my life.

Under the starry sky I once saw with my grandfather…

When I heard the story from Haruki-san, I felt I was going to lose my mind.

Sleeping in the same room together?

…after everything that happened, you’re still clinging to him?

Disgusting. I can’t believe it.

And above all…I realized something.

The one who is causing him pain is me.

In the end, Haruki-san and Yua-san are in love with each other.

If I hadn’t come between them, they might have already gone back to the way things were.

I should step aside.

If I disappear, his suffering will disappear too.

─impossible. That’s absolutely impossible.

I love him more, I would never betray him.

I think about Haruki-san more than anyone else.

The person who can make him the happiest isn’t Yua-san.

What should I do?

How can I make him understand?

I think and think…and suddenly, I realize.

My relationship with Haruki-san is one-sided.

He has never done anything for me.

But it’s different with Yua-san.

Taking her to the hospital, takes care of her afterwards…

That’s unfair.

She has done nothing but cause Haruki-san to suffer…so why?

Why, why, why?

—in that case, I’ll be a bad girl too.

I don’t care about Haruki-san’s situation anymore.

I’ll ignore everything and prioritize my own desires.

I’ll show him the dirty side of me that I’ve kept hidden until now.

I’ll show him the selfish, jealous, frustrated, and lonely part of me.

─what do you think?

I’m willing to give you everything, Haruki-san. I’ll do anything for you.

So please, I’m begging you.

Forget about Yua-san…and look only at me.

Annoying

Kaguya Sakashita’s POV

“Welcome home.”

When I return home, my mother greets me so at the entrance.

I can’t lie to her, so I decided to tell her everything that really happened.

“I was on a trip with my boyfriend.”

“Oh my!”

My mother instantly lights up with a smile on her face.

“Kaguya-san, since when did you have a boyfriend?”

“Only about two weeks ago.”

“Why didn’t you introduce him to me?”

So annoying…

“Because you’re never at home.”

“I’m so sorry! You’re right. Important things should be shared directly. Please forgive this foolish mother who can’t understand your feelings, Kaguya-san.”

“No, it’s fine.”

“Thank you. You’re so kind, Kaguya-san.”

I wish this would end soon…

“By the way, was it an overnight date?”

“Yes, for stargazing.”

“Oh, how lovely. But I can’t say I’m pleased about a high school boy and a high school girl going on an overnight trip together.”

“We’re in a pure relationship.”

This is taking forever…

“Of course, I trust you, Kaguya-san! But all men…well except for Tatsuomi-san, are all beasts. Did he do anything to you?”

“He’s even more sincere than Father.”

“Oh my, you’re quite the speaker now.”

My legs are getting tired…

“Does he have good grades?”

“He’s better than me at math.’

“Wonderful. Please study hard with him, Kaguya-san.”

This is what I really hate about her.

Test scores, achievements in sports competitions…I couldn’t care less.

What I like is someone who can understand and accept things based on their own opinions and feelings.

I can’t stand people whose opinions are influenced by other people’s evaluations.

“Kaguya-san, I’ve said this many times before, but I’ll say it again, you shouldn’t be fooled by his appearance. He might be good-looking, but his attitude might not be good. That’s why you have to get to know him better before taking the next steps.”

“Yeah, I know. You’re too worried, Mother.”

“Of course. You’re my only daughter, after all.”

Mother is always like this.

She comes home about once every ten days.

The rest of the time, she’s usually busy running the company.

Mother takes good care of me. She gives me as much money as I ask for, always makes my requested midnight snacks, and takes time off work if I say I want to see her.

If there were a “Mother’s Evaluation Sheet,” she would probably score nearly perfect and be considered an ideal mother.

But I don’t like it.

It feels like Mother is looking at me, but at the same time, she is not really seeing me.

“By the way, Kaguya-san, listen to this.”

“What is it?”

“It’s about Tatsuomi-san.”

This is the perfect example.

The only person Mother loves is Father.

She doesn’t really see me.

She doesn’t love her own daughter, but instead she loves Father’s daughter.

Since I realized this—just seeing her face makes my skin crawl.

“…I’m sorry. I’ve been travelling for a long time, so I’d like to take a bath first.”

“Oh, I—”

Alright, that’s enough. Shut everything out.

Ahh, I feel terrible.

I want Haruki-san by my side…

(…disgusting.)

I feel that I’m becoming more and more like my mother.

Probably, if I cut my hair, I’d look just like her.

I also feel like I inherited her personality of being dependent on men.

We are frighteningly similar, our strangely good intuition, and our heavy love.

(…it’s really disgusting.)

I only have vague memories of what happens after that.

However…as usual, there are more holes in the basement desk.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

‘Die, you slutty bitch.’

When I enter the classroom, there is a piece of paper on my desk.

When I look in the direction of the gaze I feel, I see two female students.

At this school, there’s a mysterious group of students that supports Haruki-san and Yua-san’s relationship as if they are an ideal couple or celebrities.

It seems I’ve attracted their attention.

It’s because of the group work before the social studies field trip.

The day after I showed off my close relationship with Haruki-san, this kind of thing started happening.

I got stopped by strangers, I received crude messages…it’s really annoying.

(…what should I do this time?)

Maybe I should crush one of them as an example.

But I don’t want Haruki to find out about this.

(…so annoying.)

I crumple the paper and throw it into the trash can.

Then I return to my seat and open my book.

I decide to ignore it.

It’s okay. I’m used to it. As long as it doesn’t cause any real harm, I can just ignore it.

(…in the end, all schools are the same.)

I distance myself from people because I hate these annoying incidents.

And yet…well, whatever. I’ll just read my book. Getting involved with them is just a waste of time.

(…I don’t need anyone other than Haruki-san.)

I sit up straight and read my book.

I can constantly hear voices around me—some are unrelated to me and some are directed to me with malice.

The most common voice that I hear sounds cheerful, but I’m never part of that circle.

So annoying.

I wish everything would just disappear.

I just want Haruki-san to be the only one left.

It would be perfect if we could have a world just for the two of us, lying on the ground and looking up at the starry sky.

That would surely be an incredibly happy world.