The Loser Lord Who Kept Getting Sweet Revenge and Somehow Rose to the Top - Chapter 20: Welcome! The Guillotine Is Waiting for You!

Chapter 20: Welcome! The Guillotine Is Waiting for You!

Maybe it was panic from us closing in, but Shakara’s flagship suddenly swung around and opened fire. Cannonballs tore through the air—yet our ship weaved through them with flawless precision, not a single shot landing.

I figured we’d turn broadside and fire back… but nope. Instead, the ship’s magic engine roared to life, and we started accelerating. …Wait, what?!

“Fold the sails! Mana reactor—full throttle, accelerate, accelerateee!! And now—deploy the ram!! Everyone, hold onto something!!”

Princess Crim’s voice boomed across the deck, amplified by magic.

The moment I heard that, I knew the princess was about to pull something insane. Linna and I clung to the railing just in time to see a massive spear of ice manifest at the bow—a magical icebreaker lance, the kind meant for plowing through frozen seas and smashing apart sea monsters. Why the hell was this even equipped on a royal yacht?!

She was really doing it. Not the ship—the princess!

“This is amazing, Master! It’s like that racing game when you pick up a mushroom and just mash the boost button! Kyahaha!”

“I have no clue what you’re talking about, but sailing ships aren’t supposed to accelerate! And—crap, the enemy’s aiming their main deck gun at us—woaaahhh!?”

On Shakara’s deck, a massive cannon had been mounted, clearly built for ship-to-ship duels. The instant it fired, I thought we were finished—

But then our ship pulled off the impossible, sliding sideways at a wild angle and dodging the blast entirely.

“Waaahh! The ship just drifted!! This helmsman is totally insaneee!!”

“Look who’s talking—you’re the craziest one in our whole household!!”

I had no idea what “drift” even meant, but I sure knew we were pulling off some kind of freakish stunt. Looking closer, I noticed the crew had already strapped themselves down with belts and harnesses, like this was just another day at sea. Seriously?! They were used to this?!

“Oryaaaaaaa! I’ll punch a hole straight through your gut with this!! RAMMING SPEEED!!”

“Here we gooo!!”

Princess Crim’s fiery command roared across the deck, and my own panicked scream overlapped with it perfectly. Meanwhile, Linna was happily swinging her arms and belting out a tune, completely carefree.

“Piling love on love again~ into endless isekai lights~ ♪ la-la-laaa~”

Yup. As expected of the most unhinged woman in House Tourmaline. Fear just didn’t exist in her vocabulary. Honestly, there’s no one more reliable to have at your side in a life-or-death fight… though God help us if we ever end up with two or three more like her.

Meanwhile, the Bereshith blasted forward, magic spewing out of its rear thrusters. The massive icebreaker lance at the bow slammed straight into the side of Shakara’s flagship.

Creeeak—crackkk! The hull groaned under the strain, but the lance ripped right through their armor and shattered their defensive wards, sinking deep into the ship’s belly. Both vessels shuddered violently and ground to a halt, locked together with the lance speared straight through the enemy’s flank.

“Haaah… haaah… thought I was gonna die there…”

“Come on, Master, up on your feet! We’ve got a trash heap named Shakara waiting to get shredded to bits!!”

With that cheerful declaration, Linna grabbed two sabers lying nearby—one in each hand—and vaulted straight from our bow onto the enemy deck.

The collision had left most of their soldiers sprawled across the planks, groaning, staggering, or slumped senseless against walls and masts. Linna darted through them like a whirlwind, stabbing and slashing with flawless precision—no wasted motion, no hesitation. She cut down anyone in her way so smoothly it was almost comical.

“Hear me, you fools far away! And you closer ones, see with your own eyes! Behold the secret weapon of House Tourmaline of Bride—your doom, delivered by the cutest and STRONGEST maid, Linna-chan!!”

…Yeah, about that “strongest” part? More like “most insane” or “most terrifying.” Either way, she tore through the chaos, bouncing around like it was a festival game, leaving enemy after enemy crippled in her wake.

And of course, even while shouting her grand introduction, she casually drove a saber into the skull of some poor bastard still twitching on the deck. Absolutely no mercy.

That’s our hidden weapon, all right—so “hidden” even I sometimes wished we’d kept her a secret.

By the time I managed to drag myself upright, draw my sword, and leap over onto the enemy ship after her, most of the soldiers on deck were already corpses.

“Phew~! I’ve cleared the way for you, Master. Praise me! Lavish me with it! Shower me in affection! I won’t mind at all if you lovingly pat my head!”

“Good work. There, there.”

“Kyahaha♡”

She shoved her head toward me, so I gave it a light pat—and Linna lit up like it was the happiest moment of her life. …Wait a second. Could it be that my household is ridiculously strong? If I don’t count non-combatant Kiriko, I might actually be the weakest one here. And I’ve been training pretty hard too! Kind of kills my confidence.

Soon after, the crew from our ship boarded and joined me as we swept through the corridors. Eventually, we reached the bridge—where Shakara was waiting.

His once-proud face was now burned and disfigured, one arm missing. That handsome count who always loved to preen? Gone. What stood before me now was nothing but a pitiful wreck.

The soldiers around him were quickly cut down by Linna’s blades, leaving Shakara standing alone.

“You—Sean?! What the hell are you doing here?!”

“Don’t make me say it, it’s embarrassing. I came here… to capture you and send you straight to the guillotine.”

[CAST IN THE NAME OF KING. YE GUILTY.]

The moment our eyes met, my ring blazed with judgment—the king’s sanction for execution. Congrats, Shakara. You’re a one-hit KO, straight to guilty verdict!

“…Tch. Even if you catch me here, our flagship and command fleet are still intact! We outnumber you by far—you’ll be surrounded and finished!”

Whether out of desperation or clinging to the last scraps of hope, Shakara kept shouting. Linna, grinning from ear to ear, tossed words back at him like it was nothing.

“Oh, yeah, totally. Good point. …Oh, right! Hey, Shakaraaa, when we boarded just now, you were keeping an eye on your flagship, weren’t you?”

“S-So what if I was?!”

And then it happened.

A sharp, metallic kiiiiiiin rang across the battlefield. For an instant, everything went silent. Every soldier, every sailor, every living thing on that sea froze in place, instincts screaming that something terrible was coming.

“Ah, there it is—‘The Wondrous Crimson Gleam’ just fell. Watch closely now~ good stuff, this is.”

Linna pointed through the bridge windows.

High above the Imperial flagship, a crimson comet dropped from the heavens. Before anyone could react—before shields could rise or cannons could fire—it speared straight through the vessel, from bridge to keel.

The torrent of magic that burst out ignited the stockpiled gunpowder inside.

BOOOOOOM!!

A blazing fire pillar shot skyward, and the Imperial flagship was obliterated in an instant, swallowed by the sea in a storm of fire and wreckage. No time to evacuate. No survivors. That was war.

“Well, there goes your precious flagship. Look, Shakara. Take a good long look.”

“Ah—aaaaaaahhh?! N-No way… t-this can’t be happening!!”

As Linna kept mocking him mercilessly, Shakara’s face twisted into pure despair at the sight of his flagship sinking and his command wiped out.

All of this—every step up to now—had been part of the plan.

The Imperial Navy held the advantage in numbers, so the strategy was simple: throw them into chaos with a surprise assault, lock their flagship in the middle of the melee, and then have Comet—waiting high above—drop his “Comet” blast straight down, sinking the enemy commander along with his ship.

―That was the arrangement. Admiral Sonelun would lead Sphere’s navy against the Imperials, while we pursued our own objective: capturing Shakara and then pulling back out of the fight.

From the beginning, Sonelun intended to crush the Imperial Navy with Sphere’s forces alone. But since we were allies, they knew Shakara for what he was—a traitor. Still, if Sphere captured him on the battlefield, they couldn’t simply hand him over to another nation.

But if we caught him as allied reinforcements, then the right to judge him—life or death included—would fall entirely to our kingdom.

That was why Sphere had called us under the banner of “reinforcement.” It was the perfect opportunity to bag Shakara.

Even so, I wasn’t about to leave all the heavy lifting to them. That’s why I slipped in one more trick of my own: Comet’s “Crimson Comet” strike. A move that couldn’t be pulled twice… but this time, it worked like a charm.

“Uwaaaaahhh!!”

At this point, the Imperial Navy’s defeat was sealed. From here on, it was nothing but cleanup. Realizing that, Shakara bolted like a rabbit desperate to escape.

“Hey, no running! Here comes a little tap~ NUH! (serious mode)”

But Linna cut him off, sweeping his legs out with the flat of her saber instead of the edge. Shakara went flying and crashed hard onto the deck. Didn’t he know? Nobody escapes Linna.

I walked up to where he lay sprawled on all fours and planted a solid kick right into his ass.

“GYEEEAAAHHHHHHHH!? M-My ass! My ass is on fiiiiireee!!”

He howled, rolling across the deck, clutching his rear with his one good arm, slamming into the wall and writhing in pain.

“You took our kingdom’s classified information and sold it to the Empire. You used it to help launch their invasion of Sphere, hoping to ride in at the front and snatch up easy credit… And boarding the frontline like this? That was just so you could loot the occupied lands, wasn’t it? The Empire allows pillaging, after all. You really are the lowest kind of man.”

With that, I grabbed his left leg and twisted it in a way no leg was ever meant to bend.

Crackkk!

His knee snapped ninety degrees in the wrong direction with a sickening sound.

“Yuhh—yu-gaaaaahhh!! S-Stop, pleeease, I’m beggin’ yooouuu!!”

“Okay, that’s game over for you~! Think about why you lost until tomorrow, alright? Maybe you’ll realize something deep and profound… oh, wait, never mind. You’ll be executed, so it’s pointless. Anyway—thanks for the treat!”

Linna mocked him mercilessly while Shakara bawled like a child, crawling across the floor in a pathetic attempt to escape.

Pathetic didn’t even begin to describe it. For a man who once strutted around as a count, doing whatever he pleased, this downfall was beyond pitiful. Practically comical.

“Despair is your finish line, Shakara.”