The Kansai Villain’s Rebirth: I Accidentally Ended Up With a Harem.

A Kansai Guy Eats Lunch with the Information Broker.

Today, I turned down Mio-chan’s lunchbox. The reason being, I’d promised to treat Takii to a meal. Rejecting her felt terribly awkward… I’m truly sorry, Mio-chan… As for Mio-chan herself, she simply said:

miomio: Don’t worry about it! Spending time with your friends is important!

That kindness stung… Yet even so, I couldn’t go back on what I’d already told Takii. Keeping promises isn’t just a matter of being a working adult—no, it’s something far more fundamental. It’s what it means to be a person.

And so, after exchanging messages with Takii on POINE, we settled on treating him at the school cafeteria today. When lunch break arrived, he came all the way to my classroom.

“Yo, Tennouji.”

“Let’s go, then.”

“W-wait… You’re really sure about this…? For some reason, Natsume and the others are glaring daggers at me…”

“It’ll be fine. Don’t let it bother you.”

Rinko especially had this blank, shadowed look in her eyes. I should probably follow up with her later. Doi seemed a little flustered too.

“T-Tennouji and lunch, huh… This is making me nervous.”

“Don’t worry. I’ve got your back.”

“I’m not gonna bite or anything. Takii helped me out, so I’m just treating him as thanks.”

“I’ve got info for you today too. I’ll fill you in while we eat.”

Seriously, where does he get all this information…? Is he one of those classic eroge characters—the mysterious information broker type? The best-friend role who somehow knows every heroine’s three sizes down to the millimeter, sources unknown. No, really—this is incredibly helpful. When you’re heading into war, information is everything. Gather intelligence, let the strategist devise a plan, then charge in with spear and shield. Anything less, and you lose. In our case, we’re more likely to be on the defensive, so knowing the enemy’s movements is absolutely critical.

When we reached the cafeteria, Takii and I both ordered Katsudon, while Doi went for katsu curry. The katsu here is seriously delicious. They use high-quality domestic pork, fried fresh to order and laid atop the rice. Crispy on the outside, juicy within, bound together with fluffy egg and rich, savory dashi. It really is incredible.

“All right! Tennouji! Let’s dig in!”

“Don’t hold back—eat up.”

The crunch of the tonkatsu… followed by shoveling rice into my mouth… It’s delicious… really delicious, but… sorry, Mio-chan’s bento is still better.

“Hell yeah! So good! And since it’s free, it tastes even better!”

“Hey, don’t say that kind of thing right in front of Tennouji…”

“Eh, it’s fine, it’s fine. I’m just glad you’re enjoying it.”

“But Tennouji, you’ve got this look on your face like Akitani’s bento would’ve tasted better.”

“Caught me, huh?”

“Of course. I’ve eaten hers before too—it’s legitimately amazing. There was this one time Imamiya said he was craving Katsudon and just handed me her entire bento, telling me to finish it for him.”

So that’s what he did. Better than throwing it away, I suppose, but it’s clear he’d been treating Mio-chan’s lunches like a nuisance for a while. And now the guy probably thinks he wants to eat them again. No point telling Mio-chan, so I’ll keep quiet.

“I’ve eaten one too when he told me to. It was insanely good, yet that idiot… I only realize it now, looking back.”

“Yeah. What a waste. To have a childhood friend who cooks that well and still treat her like that… Well, we’ll get to him today too. Tennouji, I’ve dug up a bunch of info. You don’t have to keep treating me—just hear me out.”

“You sure? Gathering all this probably comes with risks, doesn’t it?”

“It’s fine. Information rots if you let it sit. I’ve already decided on my own that we’re friends, and when a friend and his girlfriend are being targeted by semi-criminal groups and the like, I’d hate to stay silent if something happened. As long as you put it to good use, that’s enough for me.”

Takii… you’re too good a guy. I’m genuinely grateful. I’ll treat him to Katsudon again sometime.

“Doi might find this boring, though. Oh, right—about that idiot Imamiya, word is someone saw him heading into a love hotel again. And he skipped practice matches to do it. Ended up getting forcibly kicked off the team. Ever since, he’s been hanging around Tsuruhashi and the others a lot.”

That guy’s an absolute moron… He’s letting his lower half do all the thinking.

“Both Momodani and the advisor thought maybe they’d come down too hard on him. If he’d used this as a chance to turn over a new leaf and take practice seriously, he could’ve even earned a starting spot at nationals. But he gave in to his urges. That’s why he got cut. For the basketball team, rumors of a member constantly holing up in hotels with rough-looking girls would be a disaster.”

“After getting benched, he barely showed up to practice. And when he did, he had zero motivation. I lost count of how many times Tenma almost snapped at him… Momodani apparently talked to the advisor about it.”

“Well, the one who ratted him out for going to the hotel again was me.”

“Takii, you—!”

“What if that got the club activities suspended? Nationals would disappear. If that happened, Momodani and Kentarou wouldn’t stay quiet.”

“Y-You’re right…”

“He’s been running around with Tsuruhashi, Taishou, and the rest. Taishou’s got his eyes on Akitani, and the Tsuruhashi siblings are after Fuyuki. What if he’s feeding them details—habits, weaknesses?”

“Definitely possible. Things like movement patterns or times when someone’s alone.”

“Exactly. You four mostly move together, so you’re probably safe, but the moments after splitting up with Tennouji could be dangerous. Oh, and Tennouji—keep an eye on Natsume.”

“Shi-chan?”

“You know the group called Vivian?”

“Vivian?”

“Whoa, isn’t that the really shady girls’ clique?”

“Bingo, Doi. Vivian’s a gal group. Natsume used to be part of it.”

“Shi-chan was in it…”

“Yeah. She’s out now, though. Originally, it was just a bunch of gals hanging out, chatting, shopping—nothing heavy. But recently the leader changed. This girl nicknamed Cha-ko—Hineno Chiya—took over, and she’s bad news. Apparently pushes cigarettes and alcohol on minors.”

I didn’t know Shi-chan had been in something like that. Come to think of it, wasn’t that the group I told her to quit on my very first day after reincarnating? Good thing she got out.

“They’ve got ties to the semi-criminal group Shien. Rumor says they introduce cute girls from the group and force them into non-consensual acts. Cha-ko loves illegal weed, apparently. Starts with cigarettes, then once they’re used to it, moves to weed—gets them high, hands them over to Shien for cash. Sometimes even makes them do street prostitution to earn money. It’s messed up.”

“Why would Shi-chan ever join something like that? She’s already left, so it shouldn’t matter anymore, right?”

“Seems just saying she was quitting on POINE wasn’t enough. It didn’t count as proper ‘atonement.’ Ever since Cha-ko took over, anyone trying to leave gets ‘punished’—group beatings, cigarette burns—to stop them from quitting. Because Natsume didn’t go through that ritual, and because Shien’s guys really took a liking to her (losing out on big money), they’re not happy. Better not let her wander around alone.”

That’s a terrifying amount of information… Takii could probably make a living as an intelligence broker.

“Also, when Shien’s grunts tried to abduct Natsume, some tall guy with a Kansai accent beat the crap out of them. They’re holding a serious grudge over it.”

“Ah, the lanky guy and the chubby one who sent those kidnappers flying. So they were Shien, huh.”

“You’re awfully calm about this. Shien—a bunch of thugs—has their eyes on you guys. Didn’t you clash with Shien a little while ago too? Politely introducing yourself as ‘Tennouji’ and everything. They’re looking for you now. You’ve got enemies coming out of the woodwork.”

“That’s fine by me. Takii, I’ll treat you to Katsudon again. Everything’s connected now. I know exactly who my enemies are.”

The Tsuruhashi siblings. Taishou. Shien and Vivian. Each targeting Rinko, Mio-chan, and Shi-chan respectively. And Imamiya’s mixed up in it all. Just identifying the enemies is already huge. Takii’s information will continue to be invaluable.

“One more thing—Cha-ko and Imamiya were apparently seen entering a hotel together. There’s a chance he’s leaking Natsume’s info to Vivian. Is that guy some kind of indiscriminate ape?”

“Not just Tsuruhashi, huh… Seriously… like a monkey in heat.”

“That’s dangerous… Glad I stopped hanging out with him, honestly.”

“Yeah, same here. Kinda miss the old days when we were just being idiots together, though.”

“Takii, I’m truly grateful. I won’t be able to sleep facing your direction for a while.”

“Hah hah hah! Don’t worry about it. If anything else comes up, I’ll let you know. You should probably avoid the mall for a while. If you go on dates, make it a long trip somewhere far. And no going out at night.”

“Thanks a ton, Takii!”

“Whoops, talked too much—the bell’s about to ring. Yaaawn, I wanna sleep through class.”

“Me too—yaaawn. You made me yawn!”

“Don’t copy me, man. Later, Tennouji.”

“See ya, Tennouji!”

“Yeah… later.”

I got a ton of solid intel. Still, I haven’t directly run into any of them yet. Well, I’m sure that’ll happen soon enough. When it does, that’ll be the start of open war. At least now I can plan proper countermeasures to protect the girls. But the wildcard that could twist everything is NetHaza. Better to stay on guard no matter what.

Lost in endless simulations during class, I got called on by the teacher, couldn’t answer, and ended up getting scolded.