The Carnivorous Maidens Living with Me - Chapter 68 & 69

Chapter 68: The Thorn in My Heart and the Black Vortex [Sofia Kisaragi]

Tick tock… tick tock…

(I can’t sleep.)

I’m fidgeting in bed, listening to the sound of the clock.

(Why… did Shoma say something like that…?)

“Are you regretting it?”

Shoma’s serious expression and voice made my heart leap… but it wasn’t out of joy. His words struck a nerve.

“Huh? What are you talking about, Shoma! I’m not regretting anything! Let’s just head home already.”

After that, things got strangely awkward, and we hardly spoke. Shoma and I walked back to the house in silence.

(I should feel at home here by now, shouldn’t I… and yet…)

This emotion deep in my chest… I mustn’t let anyone notice it. Not anyone…

(My throat’s dry…)

I rise from bed, wiping my sweat-soaked hair, and glance at the clock’s hands.

AM 1:35

(Yesterday… I was so distant with him after that. And then, in the heat of the moment, I said I’d sleep in my own room tonight, so facing Shoma now feels so awkward…)

Holding a black haze in my chest, I slowly walk down the hallway to the living room to find a drink. My room is on the second floor, so I descend the stairs to the ground level. Halfway down, I notice the living room light is on and pause.

(Is someone awake?)

I quietly open the door to peek inside. And there…

“…I need to talk to you about something.”

“What’s that, Sho-kun! Coming to your big sister for advice~? And in the middle of the night like this! If it’s a late-night visit, you could’ve come to my room.”

…

…

…

I see the scene and slowly close the door. At that moment, I felt it clearly… a black… deep… thorn piercing my heart…

(Why am I feeling like this! I… I…)

I stumble back to my room and collapse onto the bed. Unable to sleep… the scene from earlier just keeps flashing in my mind.

※

Chun chun

“Sofi, it’s morning.”

“…Ugh… nn.”

“Sofi?”

“…Sho… ma?”

“Sofia, are you okay?”

“…Just a bit sleep-deprived… but I’m fine.”

My body feels heavy… my head aches… my thoughts won’t function… my limbs won’t obey…

“You don’t look okay at all! Wait there, I’ll grab a thermometer.”

“…Okay.”

Normally, I’d cling to Shoma, pressing our foreheads together to check my temperature… but since yesterday’s walk home, I’ve been keeping my distance from him.

“Here… I brought it.”

“Thank… you.”

I take the thermometer and tuck it under my arm. The cold metal makes me flinch with a bikun. Embarrassed and pained that Shoma saw, I turn away.

Pi pi pi pi!

…38.5°C

“This means you’re staying home today…”

“No way! I want to go to school with you, Shoma! It’s my week, after all!”

I resist with all my strength. There are only three days left to spend with Shoma… After this, I’ll barely get any time with him for almost a month. I can’t stand that!

“You can’t argue with a fever this high. You have to rest.”

“No!”

“Acting like a toddler? You’re resting, no arguments.”

“…Are you… okay with that?”

“Huh? Okay with what?”

“Not going to school… with me.”

“It’s just one day, it’s no big deal…”

The moment I hear those words, the black vortex in my heart spills over as raw emotion…

“You’d rather be with someone older, wouldn’t you?”

“What?”

“An older big sister type is better than me, isn’t it?”

“Hey, Sofi, what are you talking about…”

“I saw it yesterday…”

“Saw what?”

“You… with Yayoi-san… a late-night visit…”

“Huh? What are you saying…”

I throw what I saw in the living room at Shoma. Behind the sofa, I didn’t see the act itself, just the moment before… but I’m sure they were face-to-face, kissing. And… Shoma had his arms around Yayoi-san’s neck…

“I knew it… you never even looked at me from the start! We only started talking recently…”

Maybe because of the fever, I unleash everything I’ve been holding back on Shoma…

“Yayoi-san, the President, Hazuki, Mutsuki… they’ve all spent so much more time with you than I have. I thought I had to stay by your side as much as possible… but…”

I can’t control my emotions, and… I can’t stop the tears streaming down my cheeks.

Even though I decided this myself.

Even though I invited him.

Even though I agreed to it.

Even though I love our days together.

Day by day, it’s been changing.

At some point, it cast a shadow.

That shadow’s existence…

It’s eating away at my heart.

Oh… this feeling is jealousy.

The moment I realize it, the one thing I should never say slips out… The absolute worst thing to say.

“Shoma… I hate you…”

I couldn’t look him in the face.

Chapter 69: Regret, Reflection, and Encouragement [Sofia Kisaragi]

(Why did I say something like that?)

I’m tossing and turning in bed, tormented by the memory of this morning.

“Shoma… I hate you…”

Until now… and even this week, Shoma has been so kind to me, sacrificing so much to care for me.

(I’m the worst kind of woman…)

Recalling the scene where I shouted from the heart, I place my hand on my head.

(It’s not like Shoma kissing everyone isn’t an everyday thing… and it’s always us initiating it one-sidedly.)

Then I remember Monday.

(The first time Shoma kissed me on his own was that moment… I was a little carried away because of it.)

And…

“Not from behind, but beside me, looking forward to the future with me.”

Those words… how much they meant to me… Shoma doesn’t realize.

It felt like I became special.

I know it’s just me being conceited.

(I just… want to stay by your side forever.)

That’s probably why Shoma’s starting to notice the unease I’ve been feeling lately.

Him inviting me on a date yesterday was out of concern for me.

(Sigh… it’s hard to face him…)

I glance at the clock and realize it’s past noon.

Since I’m staying home today, I’m still in my pajamas.

I’m sweaty and hungry, but my body feels too heavy to get up.

(Is my fever still there…?)

Unable to rise, I sink back into the bed.

Just then…

Kon kon

“…Sofia-chan? It’s Yayoi, are you awake?”

(…Huh? Yayoi-san? Isn’t she supposed to be at university today…?)

Thinking the house was empty, I’m startled by the sudden visit.

Guilt from this morning’s outburst at Shoma and the arrival of the very person involved make my chest tighten.

Still…

“…Yes, I’m awake. Come in…”

“Excuse me,” Yayoi-san says as she enters, carrying a tray and a damp towel.

“…Yayoi-san, isn’t today a university day?”

Yayoi-san looks a bit troubled, but soon gives in with a sigh.

“Just the morning classes. I… skipped the afternoon.”

Her sheepish grin makes her look so young and innocent, almost more childish than us.

(I can’t compete with her…)

That black, murky feeling wells up in me again.

But Yayoi-san’s next words make it vanish.

“And, you know… it’s a request from Sho-kun.”

“…What?”

A request from Shoma…

Her words make me stare at her intently.

“This morning, Sho-kun asked me to look after you, Sofia-chan.

He said, ‘Sofia’s probably carrying a lot right now.

Some things are easier to talk about with another girl.

I… don’t think I can help her with this.’”

“…That’s not true.”

(I just lashed out at Shoma, selfishly jealous, taking advantage of his kindness…)

“Sofia-chan… Sho-kun told us…”

“…What did he say?”

Crushed by overwhelming guilt that feels like it’s splitting my head, I listen to Yayoi-san’s voice.

“Sofia should always be smiling.

She’s been enduring things alone for so long.

So I… we need to support her.

I want to take away that loneliness from her… from Sofia!

That’s why I need everyone’s help.”

“…”

What a fool I am…

Wanting to monopolize him for myself…

Jealous and angry because it wasn’t possible, I let my anger hurt him… hurt Shoma.

“It was after the President’s birthday party, wasn’t it… that’s when Sho-kun said it.”

“That’s…”

It hits me then.

I realize that ever since I saw Shoma giving the President a necklace at that party, this feeling has been surging inside me with unstoppable force.

“Sho-kun really pays close attention to all of us, doesn’t he?”

“…Huh?”

I don’t understand Yayoi-san’s words and ask her to repeat.

But instead of answering, she sits on the bed and hands me the food from the tray.

“Well… next time, you can tell me your story, okay?

For now, eat and let’s wipe off that sweat!”

“…Yes, Yayoi-san… thank you.”

After that, I pour out all my feelings to Yayoi-san…

My jealousy, my regrets.

As I talk, my head spins, and I can’t remember what I said, but Yayoi-san listens quietly.

…

“…I see.”

“…Thank you… and I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize, Sofia-chan.

Wanting to keep him to yourself?

We all feel that way.”

Yayoi-san’s words offer me a little salvation.

“You too, Yayoi-san… you…”

“Of course, I want him all to myself.”

“Right… of course…”

“But, you know, Sofia-chan.”

Yayoi-san looks straight at me, her gaze serious.

“…I love you too, Sofia-chan.

I love our days together with everyone!

It’s like having a little sister—it’s so much fun.

And, you know…

We’re carnivorous girls, aren’t we?

We’ve got hearts that don’t flinch at just anything!

Kisses and physical touch?

That’s just the tutorial!

What we’re after comes next, right?”

I can see the fighting spirit swirling in Yayoi-san’s eyes.

“And yesterday… well, this morning, I guess… that thing… we didn’t do anything.”

“Huh…?”

“Ugh… should I even tell you this…”

Her first words catch me off guard, and then she groans, clearly conflicted.

“Let’s not, after all!”

With that, Yayoi-san gently wraps her arms around my neck, pulling my face into her soft, cushioned embrace.

Her smile is warm, and her hug feels hotter than my fever.

※

After that, I felt like a weight had lifted, and combined with my lack of sleep, I fell into a deep slumber.

When I woke and checked the clock, the date had changed.

It was still the middle of the night.

Feeling a bit better, I head downstairs to the living room to quench my thirst.

Giii

A dim light is on, but prioritizing my dry throat, I open the door without checking closely.

There…

“Is your condition better… Sofi?”

In the moonlight streaming through the window… Shoma’s fragile expression is reflected in my eyes.