Surviving in a World Teeming with Monsters with the Useless Skill 【Everyday Items Master】! I Was Just Hunting Wild Animals with a Crowbar, So Why Is Everyone Screaming It's an S-Rank Monster? - 116

Chapter 116: The Tiger Parent Comes for the Stolen Cub

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I had already thought of how to kill an immortal.

“……”

I faced off against the twins, a crowbar resting on my shoulder. The twins. For some reason, neither Koufukuji-ani nor the sniper were present. The sniper had never shown themselves, but the presence I had sensed earlier was now gone.

I asked.

“Is it just you two?”

“Y-yeah~! Just us! But even with just the two of us, beating someone like you is a piece of cake, Taku-san~!”

“Th-that’s right! So let’s fight fair and square!”

From their reactions, I understood. Something must’ve gone wrong on their end too. But even so, they had come here, determined to face me. I spoke.

“If you quietly back down now, I’ll let you go.”

“”Huh?””

“You two aren’t worth my time. I don’t enjoy hurting weak opponents. So leave.”

The twins both trembled. They knew the difference in strength. I wasn’t someone they could take on alone. But still, they didn’t back down.

“Y-you sure are underestimating us, huh~?”

“That’s right! Wouldn’t it be super embarrassing if the great Everyday Item Master lost to us?”

“We might look like this, but we’re actually really strong~! Maybe you should just admit defeat and leave first!”

“…I see.”

Brushing off my last warning, I pulled a measuring tape from my pocket and said to them.

“Then, let’s begin.”

That marked the start of the battle.

Sango drew her twin blades. The blue-haired twin leveled a short shotgun and a submachine gun. But I was already swinging my crowbar faster than either of them could act.

【Hook Set】

I jabbed the crowbar into Blue Mesh’s arm and yanked her toward me. Once I managed to connect to my opponent with『Hook Set』 , the one-on-one fight was as good as won. All I had to do was stab the immobilized target with a kitchen knife.

But in a two-on-one, it wasn’t so simple. This time, Sango closed in and unleashed a powerful strike.

【Twin Drop】

“Do you really think you can ignore Shizuku, Taku-san?!”

“Yeah, I can.”

Sango’s twin blades packed a punch so strong that even I felt the numbness from blocking. I wasn’t holding my umbrella now—I couldn’t defend in time. A direct hit would rip me apart. So I threw Blue Mesh’s body in front of Sango.

“After all, your twin is kind enough to shield me.”

“-!”

At the last moment, Sango twisted her blade’s arc. I aimed my crowbar at her right, but Sango dodged by a hair’s breadth.

“Tch.”

“Wh-whoa! That was super close! I almost totally lost!”

“Sorry, Sango-chan! If I had dodged that—”

“Save it for later! Focus on the fight!”

The twins readied their stances again. I said nothing, quietly watching them. Then, Sango spoke.

“Shizuku, listen. We can’t win against Taku-san without a plan.”

“Huh!? S-so, we give up?”

“No! Just listen carefully to what I’m about to say!”

Sango whispered something to Blue Mesh—her twin sister, Shizuku. Watching them, I thought to myself. 

Sango is the core pillar between the two.

If I took down Sango, this fight would be over. Even if Shizuku remained unscathed, as long as Sango was defeated, I would win.

Apparently, the twins had also decided their approach. The earlier exchange had been a probe to gauge our strength. To defeat me, they needed a strategy—which Sango had now devised.

And I would win by crushing that plan head-on. We faced off, tension rising. A stalemate. I relaxed my body and took a deep breath.

The twins, drawing on tension to exceed their limits, breathed in shallow, rapid intervals. This time, Shizuku made the first move.

【Concentrated Fire】

She retreated to gain distance, then spun back around. From a distance, her shotgun and SMG barrels unleashed a barrage of gunfire. I couldn’t go at them head-on. I raised my umbrella.

【Open Umbrella】

A fierce onslaught. Bullets hammered my umbrella without pause. The rattling of the SMG was joined by the deep boom of the shotgun. The intense barrage reminded me of the former Wolf King’s minigun.

I lowered my stance and braced. The bullets deflected off the umbrella hit the ruins around us, kicking up dust clouds. The visibility I had maintained with my clear plastic umbrella was swallowed by smoke. I clicked my tongue, realizing their plan.

“So that’s the plan. To obscure my vision.”

“Sharp as ever, Taku-san!”

Sango slashed at me from behind. I swung my crowbar.

【Twin Drop】

【Crowbar Warhammer】

Giiiin! The clash of metal rang out. Sango gritted her teeth and vanished into the smoke.

“No openings! I seriously hate this!”

“Wait, dammit!”

I wanted to chase her, but Shizuku’s relentless gunfire pinned me down. She alternated reloading her guns, maintaining nonstop pressure. What annoyed me most was the SMG. Its rapid-fire capability made it impossible for me to shift focus from defense.

But in other words—

“There it is.”

I dashed sideways during the SMG’s reload. The shotgun blast missed behind me. Its large spread made it slower to fire than the SMG. Emerging from the smoke, I hid behind a ruined wall.

Then, staying silent, I quickly repositioned myself. If I could take down Sango, Shizuku would break mentally, and I would win. But tactically speaking, Shizuku was the bigger threat, keeping me pinned.

So I circled around, closing in on her from the shadows. I decided to take out Shizuku first. Once she was gone, Sango would fall eventually. And more importantly, while Sango’s location was unknown, Shizuku gave herself away with the sound of gunfire.

“But.”

Pulling out an alarm clock from my pocket, I muttered to myself.

“You want me to think she’s there. That I can take Shizuku out by attacking that spot.”

I set the alarm clock and tossed it toward the source of the gunfire. Then I hid, holding my breath, sharpening my senses.

【Explosive Alarm Clock】

The explosion rocked the area of the gunfire. At the same time, voices came from a different spot.

“No way!”

“How did he-!?”

“That’s why..”

I said.

“I told you two, you’re not even in my league.”

I dashed toward the source of the voices. Leaping into the dust cloud, I moved silently toward where Shizuku had shouted. Behind her. A silhouette. Blue Mesh hair.

I swung the crowbar.

【Hook Set】

“Ah!”

I yanked Shizuku close. With my kitchen knife, I sliced the tendons behind both her elbows, rendering her unable to fire her gun.

“N-no, please-!”

“I told you I would let you go.”

I raised my knife.

“But you chose to fight anyway.”

And stabbed it through her throat.

【Deadly Kitchen Knife】

The knife pierced the upper part of her throat. Normally, this would end it. But they were immortals. To kill an immortal…

You must continue killing their body.

“Ggh, guh, ah.”

I drove the knife through her esophagus, blocking it entirely. Then I pierced her cervical spine, cutting off motor signals from brain to body.

“Ah, ahh…”

The method I devised to kill an immortal was extremely simple. I didn’t need to kill them completely. I just had to stop them from moving. I had to keep them from standing in my way. It didn’t matter if they were alive or dead. I just had to seal their movement. This method would work, even against immortals like them. 

In other words…

“Pierce the spine with a knife, and motor signals can’t get through.”

I pushed the knife in deeper, fixing it in place.

“If I wedge the knife into the throat, she won’t be able to breathe.”

Her resistance weakened. She slumped, motionless. If she couldn’t move or breathe, her brain would stop, which was no different from death. No matter how immortal, no matter how powerful the healing power was…  If there was an object embedded deep inside, regeneration alone couldn’t remove it.

“Now I just have to fix it in place…!”

I took out the measuring tape, wrapped it tightly around her throat, and secured the knife in place. Shizuku stopped moving completely. I fastened the tape, temporarily sealing her death.

“T-Taku-san broke my plan…! Shizuku! We’re retreating! Are you listening? Shizu…ku…”

Sango emerged from the dust cloud and saw what I’d done.

“Wha… What did you-“

“I killed her.”

I stood, crowbar in one hand, a new kitchen knife in the other.

“I killed Shizuku.”

“No, she’s immortal, she can’t die from just that, there’s no way, she wouldn’t… Move…That’s… no, no…”

Sango trembled violently. Her emotions swirled in chaos. Fear. Denial. Despair. But they all turned into fury. Hatred.

“I won’t forgive you.”

Clenching her teeth, Sango raised her twin blades.

“How dare you do that to Shizuku! To my family!!”

“Then let me return those words right back at you.”

Sango charged, but in her rage-driven movements, she couldn’t react to my 【Hook Set】. I fixed the knife in place, and killed the other twin as well.

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