After a Heartbreak, My Bitter Childhood Friend is now Sweet Like Sugar - Chapter 1p11

Chapter 01 part 11

Translated by Devxtt

Edited by Shish

Yū’s girlfriend died.

The day after the accident, I heard about it in my classroom.

“Ah… What was her name?—— Yes, Aida Senpai from Light Music Club right? She got run over by a truck and died.”

“No way… Didn’t she have a boyfriend in our grade?”

Their conversation caught my attention, I was honestly shocked.

I hurriedly got up from my seat and asked,

“Excuse me! Can you tell me about that incident?”

The rest of the class stared at me in surprise because I normally never raise my voice.

That lunchtime, I visited Yu’s classroom.

As I feared, he was absent that day.

He may appear cool and callous, but he was very sensitive inside, much more than me or anyone in our grade. 

And he cherished his girlfriend more than anything else.

He didn’t come to school. He must’ve been at home, sick to his stomach, crying in pain as he retched in pain.

I understood him very well.

For a moment, I stopped in front of his house, wondering if I should ring the doorbell.

 Maybe I shouldn’t interfere, what if he’s grieving quietly, what if he wants to be alone. After thinking about all these things, I stopped.

I was the one who hated him and distanced myself. After everything I said, how could I face him right now?

Thoughts about him constantly plagued my mind. Should I visit him? Is there anything I could do to help him? 

During lunch, I frequently visited his classroom to look for him.

At night, I would go out to the balcony and peek into his room.

I reached out to his doorbell again and again. But I couldn’t muster the courage to press it, my finger refusing to budge.

Our houses are right next to each other. And yet, it felt like we were worlds apart. I wasn’t sure how to reach out to him.

I care for him. Yet, I couldn’t help him. I was so frustrated that I was listless throughout these days.

“Asuka River, where the river water lies still, standing still. An endless fog, blurring the path, unable to be understood. It’s not love.”

My heart ached as I heard the word “love” in the poem from Kamishiro-sensei.

She’s also Yu’s homeroom teacher. I wondered if she heard anything about his absence from school.

“In this part Akahito was describing his longing for Asuka. The word ‘love’ in this poem is slightly different from the meaning that people use today.”

“During the time when Manyoshu was written, the word ‘love’ was used to describe the melancholy of an impossible love.”

Something unreachable…

It’s like my feelings for Yu, who has a lover.

“In the Kojien (Japanese dictionary), the word ‘love’ is explained as follows: To be strongly attracted to someone who cannot live with you or someone who has passed away, and to feel sad about it. It is also called heart.”

It’s like his feeling of losing a lover. If that’s the case, I wonder how much it pains him, when his feelings will no longer reach his precious other.

That day I decided to visit him.

After school, I bought some groceries and stood in front of his room (again).

“Please, God of Courage, I beg you. Lend me just a little bit of your strength, just a little bit.”

I didn’t have the courage to tell him how I felt. I tried to sneak out of this situation, to run away, to hate him. 

But now… I wasn’t sure what to do, but I’m going to do it.

I was sure that I’m the only one who can support him. Because I knew him.

While refusing to give up, I keep ringing his doorbell. But he didn’t answer, so I sent him a text.

Even though I had repeated this scenario many times in my head, the moment he opened the door and revealed himself, I was so upset that I let out an unexpected squeal.

“Isn’t it rude to shout at someone’s face?”

“Cause I didn’t expect it to open so quickly.”

I held my breath.

“Did you sleep well?”

“I was awake. I didn’t feel good enough to sleep… So what do you want?”

“Umm… I heard that you’d been absent from school for a long time, so, um, um.”

I have to tell him.

“I’m here because I’m worried.”

That moment, I realized that I still love him.

***

ZETROTRANSLATION