She is Reading My Thoughts Again Today - Chapter 59

Third Time’s The Charm

I have experienced it myself how hard it is to call someone from their last name to their first name. I don’t even want to remember how long it took me to call Mikinori by his first name. I used to call Mikinori by his last name which is ‘Hatano’ and it surely took me a very long time to get used calling him by his first name. I still remember it clearly when I still wasn’t used to call Mikinori by his first name, as I uttered the word ‘Ha’ Mikinori immediately corrected me by saying ‘Mi’. I told him that I don’t have to call him by his first name, but he replied that if I don’t call him by his first name, he wouldn’t notice if I’m calling him. I wonder if there is anyone else like him, and because of it I managed to call him by his first name.

So it’s no surprise that I still call her by her last name. After all, it’s not like she wants me to call her by her first name, and I’m already lucky enough to be able to call her by her last name. There is no reason for me to be upset just because Kisaragi called Hoshikawa by his first name. Nevertheless, the coiled feeling I felt when she invited me to the Halloween party still lingers in my heart. Thanks to this, I can’t even face her right now. So I lied that I’m on duty and escaped to the library. In the end, this is how I think about her, it’s no longer an escape from reality.

“What’s wrong? You look down.”

I’m taken aback by those words, I immediately look up to the source of the voice. My eyes widened in surprise at the person in front of me. She is looking at me with a smile on her face. What a surprise, I didn’t know she could make that kind of face and I’m happy to see her like that. This time, I know who she is. She is Yuna Sato. But why is she here smiling at me like that?

“May I sit in front of you?”

I can’t help but to think about her overly natural attitude at me, but I said ‘please’ and she sits in front of me.

“Are you surprised?”

“Yeah, very.”

“Hehh.”

She laughs at my response. She laughs rather freely, like an amiable smile.

“You’ve been looking down lately, that makes your expression seems darker than usual.”

“I’ve been looking down lately huh?”

“So, finally you’ve started dating?”

Those words took my breath away. I wonder whether I should affirm or deny it in front of her, I can feel a chill run down my spine as I’m thinking about it. Even if it’s only once, it doesn’t change the fact that she is the one who resorts to violence when she got into a quarrel with Kisaragi. No matter how much she smiles in front of me, I can’t let my guard down, I’m starting to worry about Kisaragi.

But she remained calm.

“I’m not trying to pick a quarrel with you or something like that, in fact I want to congratulate you. Yeah, congratulations.”

“…thankyou?”

I return a bow of gratitude for her sincere congratulations.

“I mean I had a hunch that you’ve started dating. But I’m surprised I’m right.”

“Not because someone told you?”

“I can somehow tell by your atmosphere. Well, I’ve been watching you for a long time.”

Although her tone is quite light, I can sense an extraordinary burden in her words. I can tell the slightest change in the atmosphere that I know she is thinking about her behaviour. With a fresh expression that makes you think she is still in the past, she continues.

“Since then, my friends and families have said a lot of things to me, and I’ve thought about it in my own way. Usami-kun has helped and reached his hand to me, but I have always returned his kindness with hostility, haven’t I? It is only natural for him to hate me like that. I regret what I have done to you and Kisaragi. Yeah, I’m really sorry.”

She bowed so deeply that I can hardly her face. But I’m not the one she should apologize to.

“You don’t have to apologize to me, but I want you to apologize to Kisaragi properly.”

She looks up at my words.

“I just apologized to her earlier.”

“…earlier?”

“Yeah, just before I came here. I went to the classroom and Usami-kun was the only who wasn’t there, so I thought you might be here.”

“Ahh, is that so?”

Although it’s hard for her to think about her own behaviour, it seems that she is able to apologize as the time passes. Seeing my reaction, she began to laugh.

“I guess you didn’t expect me to apologize. Kisaragi was equally surprised, but she forgave me and even gave me a tangerine, you know? I was surprised.”

I can’t help but to feel surprised, but I think she is probably being sincere in her own way. I actually want ask her if Kisaragi was alone in the classroom or not, and if Kisaragi wasn’t alone, did anyone tried to stop her? But there is no point in asking her that now.

“The tangerines she gave me were also really tasty. Unless you are afraid of food given by other people, you should try it.”

“Is that so? Then, I think I’ll try it after I have my lunch.”

“Also, it is better not to say anything about tangerines in front of Kisaragi. Kisaragi, and in the worst-case scenario, another person might join in and talk about how wonderful tangerines are endlessly.”

“Are you purposely changing the topic? Or did you just naturally talk that way?”

“…what were we talking about?”

“We are talking about what’s bothering you, Usami-kun!”

She said it loudly despite we’re in the library. That’s really bad. The librarian naturally turned back at her voice and stare at us with her irritated eyes. I apologized to her and kept my face down. I have to apologize to the librarian properly later. However, Yuna Sato seems to have interpreted it differently, she even got more excited.

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. But it’s not a good thing to stop seeing each other when you just started dating, you know!? I really want to help you with that.”

I’m sorry, I’m really sorry, I’m very sorry. I can’t stop apologizing in my mind.

“…I understand that Sato-san is concerned about me. Perhaps because Sato-san was also helped by her friends about her problems, now you want to help me with my problem.”

“Well, if you understand that, why don’t you just tell me what’s bothering you?”

You said earlier that I don’t have to tell you if I don’t want to. But to think about it, she might be the right person to ask for an advice on my current problem. On top of that, an opinion from a girl is very valuable.

“Okay, I understand, I’ll talk. But can you turn your voice down a little, this is a library.”

“But there’s no one here anyway.”

I can’t help but to sigh at her response.

“But there’s a chance someone will come here.”

“I guess so.”

“Yeah, so here’s what’s bothering me.”

“Hmm.”

Her eyes seem to sparkle even more. I don’t think it’s that much to expect, but I don’t know if it is for her. After I took a deep breath, I start to talk about it.

“Do you think it’s weird to suddenly call someone from their last name to their first name?”

She stayed silent for a few seconds. In those few seconds, the sparkle in her eyes began to fade and her expression seems disappointed. She tilts her head to the right as if asking me ‘That’s it?’.

“I think that’s a cute little problem?”

“I’m trying to be serious here.”

“You look so depressed about it, I thought it’s going to be worse than that.”

I don’t know what she exactly meant by worse, but as far as I know, it’s not a good thing. So, I do not dare to ask her about it.

“So, what do you think?”

“I think you should start calling her by her first name when you feel like to.”

“That is such an abstract answer.”

“I can’t answer it that way, can’t I?”

“What you said isn’t wrong, but I’m curious how people do it in general.”

“Then why don’t you just give it a try?”

“To who?”

“Me.”

“…Yuna-san?”

She seemed to blush when I call her like that. I’m not sure though because she immediately stood up and turned her back to me.

“At least, I’m happy.”

“Okay, I get it.”

“Now that I know I can’t help you with it, I’ll get going.”

“Ahh, thank you for going out of your way to help me.”

I look at her as she hurriedly leaves the library. Well, I guess she is happy about it. But what about Kisaragi? How will she react when I call her by her first name? Only Kisaragi knows the answer to that, and I can only decide whether to call her by her first name or not.

Bam.

“…ah.”

The sound of the door closing brought me back to myself. I look at the librarian who is closing the door annoyedly.

“I’m sorry for all the fuss.”

I hurriedly get up and bow to the librarian.