Chapter 9: The Yandere Uprising

The breakfast scene was pretty much the same as yesterday.

Mom and my little sister watched me and Kaede feed each other with amused grins.

I’ve gotten so used to it that I don’t even care anymore.

Well, walking to school together was also mostly the same, I guess?

“Isn’t this exciting?”

“Yeah…”

The only difference was that we were holding hands like a couple this time.

For me, having just lost the first kiss I guarded for seventeen years, this was merely a minor detail!

“Hey, don’t you have morning practice? For the tennis club, I mean.”

People who take their club activities seriously are really something. They spend weekends, early mornings, and after-school hours on them. And I bet there are even people who manage to juggle that with studying, hobbies, and romance. They live in a completely different world.

Well, if I think about it, I’m the one who’s living in another world now. What is this place, anyway? Another dimension? A parallel universe?

“We’re a weak team, you know.”

Uh-oh, was that a touchy subject?

She picked the same high school as me, curse or no curse. And yet, back in our first year, we barely talked at all.

I wonder if she resents me for that. Though honestly, from my perspective, that would just be misplaced anger.

“Is that how it is? I thought weak teams usually just practiced endlessly without much thought.”

“Yeah, that does happen. The baseball team stays late into the night, but they’re still weak.”

Oh, so they’re weak.

Apparently, they practice from dawn until the verge of getting scolded for loitering, and they’re still weak.

No phones, forced buzz cuts, no dating… Oh yeah, I remember them practicing even during exam weeks. Isn’t that the kind of thing that would make the school board or Ministry of Education mad?

Wait, no dating? Didn’t one of the baseball guys get dumped by his girlfriend? Well, rules don’t matter much if you don’t care about them anyway.

While I was mulling that over, Kaede suddenly brought up that guy’s story.

“The pitcher comeback incident was sad, but I couldn’t help laughing. I mean, isn’t it reflex to close your legs or put your glove up? I probably shouldn’t say this, but… he’s kind of slow.”

Yeah, unless it’s a crazy line drive, it’s not usually going to hit you there. Normally, anyway…

That guy’s cursed. I mean, I’m cursed too, so I kind of sympathize. You can’t fight it. It’s not something you can avoid with brains or reflexes.

Even if he had blocked the ball, he’d probably find a bee in his underwear the next day or come down with a mysterious fever that made him infertile. Or maybe he’d run into the groin-crushing old man and still end up the same.

“Hey, don’t laugh. I get it, but that must’ve hurt like hell.”

“Do guys always sympathize with that? From a girl’s perspective, it just looks lame and pathetic.”

“Hah, the Kaede I know was a little kinder than this.”

I remembered her as the type of girl who’d take a kid with scraped knees to the nurse’s office.

Maybe it’s just because she doesn’t understand the pain?

I mean, even on TV and in manga, that kind of thing is usually played off as a gag…

“……”

Huh? Did I just step on a landmine?

We were having a nice, lighthearted conversation, and now it feels like I messed up somehow.

“What do you even know about me? Girls can turn into completely different people the moment you look away, you know? That’s why you shouldn’t look away. But you did, didn’t you, Kogoro?

Oh, what, you think middle schoolers aren’t kids anymore? That’s something only boys think. At least, you were still just a kid back then.

Have you ever heard that people cry more as they get older? That’s because their ability to empathize gets stronger.

Do you think a boy who calmly went about his day while I was soaking my futon with tears, vomit, and pee could possibly have the same level of empathy as a girl?

And that thing you said—that made it sound like I’m not kind at all, didn’t it?

Is it really so wrong to laugh at someone who embarrassed themselves as a pitcher—a prestigious position—and made such a ridiculous mistake? Sure, maybe laughing at someone’s misfortune is in bad taste. But in this case, I can’t help it.

If I were in his position, I’d just commit seppuku right there. It’s that embarrassing. So isn’t it kinder to laugh?

And yet, you had the nerve to call me unkind? Me, who’s showing mercy to a worthless guy with less value than the cuticle on your pinky finger?

How dare you say that, Kogoro. The same Kogoro who mercilessly abandoned his childhood friend on a whim. You really lack self-awareness, don’t you? That’s just another ‘kid point’ for you.

You know, I think childlike Kogoro is cute in his own way, but as a boy, I’d like to see you try and act a little cooler, show a little more pride, you know? Yeah, that’s it. I want to see you act like a man.

Come on, Kogoro—show me your manhood right now…”

“Kaede!”

“W-What? My shoulder hurts, you know? Don’t just grab me out of nowhere like that!”

“What’s with the baseball team?! What’s with the one-balled freak show?! Just look at me and only me!”

“…Okay!”

Phew, I avoided being charged for public indecency.

Our hand-holding progressed to her clinging tightly to my arm, but in the face of something bigger, this is just a minor detail!

Her intense gaze bore into me as we walked, but it’s fine because I’m keeping my eyes on the path ahead!

With the usual teasing from our classmates, Kaede and I took our seats.

Is this going to happen every day for the rest of the school year? I need to lift this curse, fast…

“Hey, Sakamoto.”

Oh crap—it’s Kuma-san! I completely forgot about her!

This is bad. The tragedy of Sankebetsu is about to repeat itself…

“Why didn’t you walk home with me? Why did you run away…? I just wanted us to talk while walking together…!”

S-She’s crying?!

Kumanokyo, the same girl who allegedly makes others cry but never sheds tears herself, is bawling!

She’s crying out loud like a scolded elementary school kid, completely ignoring everyone around her.

Ah, I can feel it—those judgmental stares from the girls in class. Their hostility is palpable!

Meanwhile, Sasaki is smirking. I can use him as a sacrifice…

“Even though you always stare at my chest! I’ve been putting up with the embarrassment and unbuttoning for you, you know! And you just toss me aside because you’re bored of me?!”

Stop it! I admit I was staring, and I admit I was starting to get used to it. But you don’t need to yell it out loud!

“Kumanokyo! No—Momiji!”

Before she could spiral further out of control, I grabbed both of her hands in mine.

“S-Sakamoto?”

“You know, you talking to me helped me get through the year. A friendless guy like me… you have no idea how much that meant. Thank you.”

That’s the truth.

On rough mornings, I’d think to myself: “If I go to school, she’ll show me some cleavage. If I’m lucky, maybe I’ll even catch a glimpse of her bra.”

That’s what I told myself to pull me out of bed.

Thank you. Honestly, there’s no other way to put it.

“Sakamoto!”

She pressed my face into her ample chest, maybe as payback for holding her hands.

They say you’re supposed to return gifts threefold on White Day, but this is like a hundredfold return.

She smells nice. Is it perfume? Body soap? I don’t know, but it’s calming…

Compared to Kaede, the class rep, or Kurokawa-senpai, this size is on a whole other level—elevating me to the heavens…

“Kogoro? They say ‘when the cat’s away, the mice will play,’ but are you saying my chest is a washboard? A virgin like you wouldn’t understand, but I’ve actually got quite a bit, you know?

You’ve been watching too much anime and playing too many games. Thinking 52 kilos is ‘heavy’ is just proof that you’re a hopeless, unpopular guy. Oh, oops, did I just say my weight? How embarrassing!

But you know what’s really embarrassing? The fact that, after I straddled you to wake you up, you didn’t even try to attack me. That completely crushed my confidence as a girl, you know?

What’s so fun about taking away a girl’s confidence? Are you the type who refuses to marry high-earning women because of your fragile pride? Honestly, know your place, Kogoro!”

What the hell am I supposed to do?!

Two yandere girls in the same class? I can’t keep up!

It’s like one of those battle manga scenarios: if I defend against one attack, the other one hits me. There’s no escape!

“Kogoro-chan? You refused Mama’s breasts, but now you want some other bad girl’s breasts? You’re such a selfish baby, aren’t you? C’mon, Kogoro-chan. Come back to Mama. Show me those strong little legs of yours—there you go!”

There’s a third one now. Three of them.

I can’t win a one-against-three. You can’t send three boss-class opponents at once! It’s supposed to be the other way around: three members of the protagonist’s team against one boss. That’s the rule!

Even on novel posting sites, it’s the cliché stories that win. Stick to the basics, please!

“Ugh…”

Suddenly, someone groped me. Down there.

But no one’s hands should be on me. And yet, I definitely got groped.

There’s a fourth one. A fourth one with stealth capabilities.

This is a rigged battle. It’s so blatant it’s not even tense anymore. They’ve overdone it.

The war between the girls continued until the bell finally rang.

As they ignored me and argued among themselves, I couldn’t help but wonder: “Is this what noble families are like?”

It was terrifying.