Chapter 52: Future Plans

Yesterday was absolute hell. That wasn’t just a packed schedule—it was a full-on disaster. No one should cram that much into a single day. Honestly, the event itself shouldn’t even exist. It felt like one of those scrapped events you only find years later after someone digs through a game’s code.

I want to forget it as soon as possible, but every time I go to the bathroom, it all comes flooding back.

“Wow… so smooth…”

Hair removal cream is amazing. If you shave normally, it leaves everything prickly and gross, but this stuff? No discomfort at all. Though, I can’t deny—it looks pretty weird.

“Kogoro? If we don’t leave soon, we’re gonna be late!”

“Ah, sorry, sorry! I’ll be out in a second!”

Needless to say, Kaede stayed over last night. Maybe she was satisfied after all that chaos, so she didn’t press me further about Shiro. Honestly, that was the only silver lining. Yeah, focus on the positives. If I don’t, I’m not gonna make it.

“You sure you’re okay? You’ve been in there a while for just a quick bathroom trip.”

“Huh? Haha, yeah, just taking it slow—gotta watch out for dizziness right after waking up, you know?”

Of course, that’s a lie. Well, technically, you can get lightheaded when you pee first thing in the morning, so it’s not completely wrong. But that wasn’t the reason I took so long. I was just sitting there, staring at my freshly smooth… area. Yeah, feeling ridiculously self-conscious.

“You’re like an old man.”

“Hey, even young people have to be careful!”

“Alright, alright, let’s get ready, Grandpa Kogoro.”

Moments like this almost make us seem like normal childhood friends. Sure, the conversation’s a bit crude, but it’s got a certain kind of realism to it.

“So, what’s the deal with Shiro-chan anyway? You’re spilling everything on the way to school, okay? Oh, and by the way, what does nehorihahori even mean? I get the nehori part—digging up roots. But hahori? Leaves? You can’t dig up leaves, can you? What’s that about? I mean, sure, I get that it’s wordplay, like rap or something. But seriously, why? Why does everything get a free pass just because it flows? Huh, Kogoro? You and her totally did the thing, didn’t you? Don’t think going with the mood excuses anything! It’s too late now!”

Yeah, this. This is the reality. This is the baseline. Totally not normal.

“Uh, how about we just go to school, yeah? You were the one—”

“Why is school-hating Kogoro suddenly so eager to go today? Oh, wait, I know! It’s because you can’t wait to see your precious Shiro-chan! That’s gotta be it, right? I mean, you could skip school and still hang out with me, so there’s no other reason you’d want to go. Hey, you know what? Do we even need to go to school? That wannabe revolutionary kid said the same thing. He’s a complete idiot, but even I gotta admit he had a point there.”

“Well, even that guy ended up going to school—”

“Why do we even go to school? What’s the point? Why bother going?”

What is this? A Zen riddle? We’re seriously gonna be late! And where’s Mom? Why are we still arguing at home when it’s this close to the bell?

“Uh, well, isn’t it to learn social skills?”

Let’s go with the safe answer…

“Look at adults. Smoking while walking, littering, doing stuff even kids know is wrong. Harassment at work, abuse of power—it’s everywhere. Bullying? Still alive and well. Look at how some people harass celebrities online or sling insults at strangers. Picking fights with station staff, complaining at convenience stores, using ambulances like taxis… The world’s full of awful adults. And you think they’re all dropouts? Nope, most of them went to school. That’s where they were supposed to learn their ‘social skills.’ But look at them now. What a joke. They should just rename schools to ‘Monster Factories.’ And don’t get me started on how schools ignore bullying. There’s no way you’re building social skills in a place like that.”

This isn’t the kind of debate you have when you’re about to be late for school.

Sure, there will always be people like that, whether or not schools exist. But there are also people who don’t turn out that way, right? Isn’t that thanks to school?

“I guess you’d call those outliers? No matter what, there are always exceptions like that…”

“So, you’re saying hopeless kids are just hopeless no matter what? If that’s the kind of system that gives up on saving people and casts them out, then it’s worthless. That’s just choosing who gets to live.”

Isn’t that a bit of a leap? It’s not that the unsaved don’t matter—it’s just that you can’t save everyone. That’s how countries work, right? Instead of dooming everyone by overreaching, they focus on saving as many as they can. It’s not just countries, it’s the principle of life itself… Wait, why am I even thinking this deeply about it?

“L-Let’s just go, okay? If we don’t, our futures will—”

“Our futures will what? You’re saying time stops if we don’t go to school? Time moves forward no matter what. Everyone grows up, you know?”

“Well… that’s not growing up, that’s just aging. You’re just a bigger kid with an older body.”

We’re seriously going to be late at this rate. Can she give it a rest already? How badly does she not want me to see Shiro? She’s going to get in trouble with her parents too if she skips school.

“Look, you’ve gotta go to school if you want to get a decent job.”

“Who cares if I don’t get a good job?”

What the hell? A life where you scrape by on low pay, working yourself to death just to make ends meet—that’s not a life anyone wants, right? At least, I don’t want that.

“You don’t have to work yourself to death. Just get by with something small.”

“If you aim that low, you’re only earning pocket change. You won’t survive.”

“Then just live without money.”

…What? Without money, you can’t even live a modest life. Is she seriously planning to live off park water and convenience store leftovers?

“What are you even talking—”

“I’m saying we can just move to some deserted island. If we have enough money to start, we can live self-sufficiently. We’ll make clothes out of local plants—wait, we don’t even need clothes, right? We’ll build a house with wood and stones, catch fish and hunt animals to eat. Growing vegetables and fruits sounds fun too. As long as there’s a man and a woman, we won’t need entertainment. And we don’t need doctors either—love can cure anything. There’s that saying, right? ‘Where there’s love, there’s no need for doctors.’ Sure, we won’t have proper facilities or tools for safe childbirth, but who needs them? I want a baby, but if it means dividing the love that should all be for me, I’ll let it go.”

Every hair on my body stood on end—even though they’d all been shaved off.

This is bad. At this rate, she’s going to kidnap me. I’ll wake up on some remote island in the middle of nowhere.

“Wait, wait, wait! Deserted islands are owned by someone! Even if they’re uninhabited, they belong to a country! You can’t just move there! It’s not happening, okay? Not happening!”

I fought with everything I had to change the course of this conversation. For the record, this isn’t just me bluffing.

“Hmm… I see…”

Kaede started fiddling with her phone, searching for something. I couldn’t see the screen, but I could guess.

“Wow, deserted islands are pretty expensive, huh?”

See? I knew it. She’s actually looking into it.

“Well then, let’s go to school, Kogoro.”

Phew… Looks like she gave up. That’s a relief…

“You’re right, Kogoro. I’ll need to work hard, get into a good company, and earn a lot of money.”

“Uh, yeah. Exactly.”

“And then we can buy a deserted island! We’ll live in a cheap, run-down apartment to save money, buy the island, and figure out the rest! Sure, property taxes and infrastructure will cost us, but we can cover that by using the island for shady businesses! We could let them use it for drug deals… or even grow some ourselves! Or maybe we could turn it into a hideout for smugglers. They could use it as a stopover while we arrange fake passports and IDs. Oh, we’ll need to hire a shady plastic surgeon too. And to stay on the cops’ good side, we’ll have to build some connections with them… There’s so much to do! This is getting exciting. Alright! I’ll study hard for our future island life! Let’s go!”

Wait… am I being roped into becoming some ultimate criminal mastermind?

…Well, I guess her being motivated to study is a good thing.

“Let’s go!”

I raised my fist as high as Kaede’s.

If it means keeping the peace for now, I’ll go along with it.