My Popular-as-Hell Best Friend Is Annoying, So I Want to Get Him a Girlfriend and Shut Him Up - Chapter 35 & 36 & 37

Chapter 35: The HareHare Invitation

“Hey, Yukiya.”

It’s after school.

Homeroom just ended, and as everyone heads to their clubs, Uryu, unusually for this time, calls out to me.

“Nope.”

“I haven’t even said anything yet.”

“You rushing to the gym after homeroom but stopping to talk to me?

I’ve got a bad feeling, so rejected.”

“Come on, you might change your mind if you hear me out.

Just listen.”

What’s with him, being so persistent?

He usually backs off quick, so maybe there’s something he can’t let go.

Fine, for the sake of our neighboring desks, I’ll hear him out.

“What’s up?”

“Can you help pick up balls for basketball?”

“You thought that would change my mind?

You okay in the head?”

Some people exaggerate about “wasted time” listening, but I can say with all my heart: I wasted my time!

“Come on, you’re free, right?”

“Even if I am, I’d never pick that option.

You’re annoying.”

“Chill, helping the basketball team means you’d get to interact with the manager, Rando-san.”

Oh, right, Rando-dono’s the boys’ basketball team manager.

But I’m leaving her strategy to her, and going out of my way for a planning session feels wrong—like I don’t trust her.

Plus, talking about that during club time seems off.

What’s the future captain thinking?

…Hold on.

Even if a strategy session with Rando-dono was okay, why’s Uryu pushing it?

If he was into her, like with Kirita Akari, he’d have gone on a date or two without involving me.

Why drag me into it?

I hate to think it, but is this about countering Rando-dono?

If Uryu’s not keen on her, unlike before, he might want me as a buffer to focus on club.

I don’t think she’d disrupt practice, but negative thinking leads to possibilities like this.

No, that’s probably not it.

Even in a case like that, Uryu would handle it himself.

He’d never push a problem onto someone else.

So, this isn’t something Uryu’s thrilled about.

Sure, he might get a kick out of watching me scramble for balls, but let’s think beyond that.

“Hey, Yukiya, what’s up?

You went quiet.”

Ignoring Uryu’s voice, I dive into figuring out his real motive.

Is it important that I pick up balls? Not really.

Is it important I’m at the basketball club?

Possible, but I can’t connect the dots.

Hmm, let’s switch gears.

Picture myself picking up balls at the basketball club.

A missed pass flies out of the court, and I chase it down.

The gym’s split for different clubs, with nets lowered from the ceiling between courts.

If the ball hits the net, no issue, but if it slips through the corner, it could bother other clubs.

The boys’ basketball team uses the first gym, alongside the girls’ basketball team, badminton club, and drama club on the stage.

It wouldn’t reach the drama club, but with the girls’ team next door, balls might fly back and forth constantly.

—Oh, I get it.

It clicks.

It’s not about being at the basketball club—it’s about being in the gym.

“Kamishiro Haruka said something, didn’t she?”

Uryu didn’t bother hiding it, pausing briefly before muttering, “Well done.”

“How’d you figure it out from just that?”

“Trying to trick me?

You’re a hundred years too early. Try again.”

“I’m genuinely impressed.

If only you used that brain for world peace.”

Hey, weren’t you just impressed?

That extra jab, huh?

“She messaged me at lunch, asking me to bring Yukki to the gym after school.”

“Tough luck.

Tell her to curse the sloppy schemer, Aoyagi Uryu-kun.”

“You’re the type to dodge sweet deals, so I thought hyping Rando-san after setting a high bar might hook you.”

“I’ve already made peace with Rando-dono, so no need to go see her.”

“That’s a miscalculation.

Guess I’ll apologize to Kamishiro-san.”

Uryu fiddled with his phone, replying to Kamishiro Haruka.

“Why didn’t she just tell me directly?”

“‘Cause you don’t have a phone.

She said she asked you at lunch, but you shot her down.”

“Obviously.

Why should I deal with her whining?”

“Other guys would erupt hearing that.”

“Why?

She’s got a boyfriend.”

“Not at this school anymore—he graduated.

Plenty of guys are eyeing her now.”

“That’s her fault, boundary-breaker.”

“That’s probably why she wants to talk to you.”

“Huh?

What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Lots of reasons.

Talking to you’s fun for her.”

Ugh, that gave me the creeps.

No, that’s scary.

That refreshing smile doesn’t make it less scary.

“Anyway, now that the cat’s out of the bag—”

“Not going.”

“Knew you’d say that.”

“I’ve got my own after-school plans.

Where to today?”

Standing up with a rhythmic flair, I accidentally kicked my desk, knocking stuff out.

Crap, damn it.

“Hm?”

While picking up papers and textbooks, I spotted an unfamiliar note.

Come to think of it, I was so into my ant guide today I didn’t check my desk.

What’s this?

Unfolding the note, it read:

“After school, ☽”

Short and sweet, with a crescent moon symbol instead of the kanji.

“…Haa.”

Instantly knowing who it’s from, I let out an unconscious sigh.

“What’s up?”

Showing Uryu the note, he let out an ambiguous “Oh…”

What’s with that vibe?

“Being popular’s tough, huh?”

“It’s tough ‘cause of you.”

“But you’re going, right?”

“As long as there’s a chance we’re linked.”

“If you want that, deal with the chaperone.”

“I’ve told you that a million times.”

For a moment, time froze between us, and we sighed in sync.

No choice.

Today’s the day I’ll lay it out.

She called me, so she’s ready, right?

“When’d she even slip this in?

What if I didn’t notice?”

“Then she’d probably chill, knowing her.”

“Man, my precious after-school time’s gonna cost her.”

“You’re being summoned by both HareHare girls.

Just be happy.”

“They’re just two airheads to me.

Why would I be happy?”

“Airheads, huh…”

“I’m heading out.

Gotta wrap this up quick.”

“Sure, tell her I said hi.”

“Tell her yourself, idiot.”

With that, I bolted out of the classroom to meet the other HareHare girl, Tsukikage Miharu.

T/N: Now, regarding the confusion you guys may have, that despite the HareHare nickname, the names are actually haru, Haruka and Miharu. It actually refers specifically to the characters that make up those names. (晴) can be read as either Haru or Hare. Haru is used in formal names, while Hare is usually used as a nickname. There’s a clear reason why they would use HareHare as the nickname even when the way the names are read it’s Haru. Hare means sunny/bright, as you can probably already see from Haruka’s behaviour, she’s literally sunny, her personality specifically.

ANDDDD, regarding the moon symbol. It’s rooted in the name Tsukikage, Tsuki literally means moon.

Chapter 36: Chance Encounter

Tsukikage Miharu is a beauty who rivals Kamishiro Haruka, her classmate from their first year.

Unlike the lively and energetic Haruka, Miharu speaks with a calm demeanor, and combined with her appearance, she’s quietly hailed as the second coming of a Yamato Nadeshiko.

I get it.

In terms of looks, the general consensus is spot-on.

I understand why Haruka and Miharu dominate guys’ rankings, sparking debates like “Team Mushroom vs. Team Bamboo.”

But that’s strictly about appearances.

When it comes to romance, despite their popularity, they’re total disasters.

I’d rather not deal with either, but I’ve been roped into Miharu’s Uryu-related consultations since our first year.

There’s been zero progress—it’s like she’s praying to a deity, visiting me once a year.

Though, these mysterious meetups happen monthly.

“Oh!”

As I steeled myself to drill my lecture into her today, a rather timely girl approached from the other direction.

Wavy, long blonde hair.

Sparkling fake nails.

A miniskirt folded at the waist who-knows-how-many times.

She’s like a protagonist waging war against school rules.

“Yo.”

Normally, I’d never call out to her, but after the Rando-dono incident, I felt like chatting a bit.

“Huh?”

Natori Mayoi, who’d been glued to her phone, shot me a sharp glare.

Whoa, “huh?” as a first response?

But this girl—her outfit’s full-on extra, yet her face is completely natural.

If she’s wearing makeup, it’s gotta be pro-level.

Not that I know much about it.

“…What?”

She stopped and faced me.

Seems like she’s willing to talk.

Now what?

I called out, but I’ve got no real topic.

It’s after school, so maybe something safe like club activities?

“Heading to club?”

“Hah, drop dead.”

That’s harsh.

I’m not saying we have to be buddies, but can’t we at least have a human conversation?

“I’m not about to take clubs seriously.

So lame.”

Natori Mayoi crossed her arms, spitting the words out like they bored her.

If that’s your stance, maybe lead with that instead of “drop dead.”

“Well, you don’t exactly look dressed for club.”

“Hah?”

“Not dropping dead, by the way.”

“…Drop dead?”

She said it even after I got the first word?

There was a pause, so I thought she held back, but nope—she said it with more feeling this time.

Guess “drop dead” is her version of a greeting, like “morning” or “hello.”

If I think of it that way, she’s a super friendly girl who loves saying hi.

Man, how positive am I?

“Hey, Yukiya, still hanging around here?”

As I was founding the “Let’s Take Natori Mayoi’s Words Positively” club, Uryu, fresh from the classroom, called out.

He’s probably heading to the gym.

“Oh, you’re talking with Natori-san.

Hey.”

“…Mm.”

Noticing Natori Mayoi, Uryu greeted her, but she rubbed her arm, avoided eye contact, and gave a short reply.

Hey, where’s your usual greeting?

Shouldn’t you tell Uryu to drop dead too?

“Feels like it’s been a while.

First time talking since we became second-years, right?”

“Maybe.”

“Different classes make it hard to chat.

By the way, you doing any clubs?

Don’t see you much at the gym.”

“Been feeling off lately.”

“Oh, yeah, season changes can get you sick.

Gotta watch out.

Heatstroke’s a pain too.”

“You seem like you’d nail both.”

“Just hydration and sweat management.

On bad days, my tank top’s so soaked you could wring it out.”

“What, like in a manga?”

Listening silently to their chat, my eyes went wide.

Uryu’s demeanor is nothing new—I’ve seen it a million times—but Natori Mayoi?

She doesn’t seem like the same person who was talking to me.

Her expression’s composed, but her words have zero edge.

You could say it’s because she likes him, but if she’s just looking down on me, that’s unforgivable.

Also, “feeling off lately”?

Didn’t she just say she skips club because it’s “lame”?

“Alright, I’m off to club.

Catch you later.”

“…Mm.”

“Yukiya, come to club if you’re free.”

“Told you I’m not going.”

Wrapping up with Natori Mayoi, Uryu headed to the gym.

Popping in and leaving like a storm—nothing but a nuisance.

I glanced at Natori Mayoi, and our eyes met.

She gave an obvious tongue-click.

Maybe she’s embarrassed I saw her talk with Uryu up close, but don’t take it out on me.

Sticking around here won’t do me any good, so I wanted to bail quick, but—

“You’re still playing Aoyagi’s little sidekick, huh?”

Her snarky, insulting comment made me stop.

Me, Uryu’s sidekick?

What’s she talking about?

“Don’t mess with me.

I’ve never once wanted to hang with him.

If anything, I’m the fish, and he’s the poop.”

“What’s that, you saying Aoyagi’s the one chasing you?

That’s lame and creepy.”

“Short-sighted thinking and childish emotions.

Ugh, I don’t wanna be seen as the same age as someone like you.”

“…You picking a fight?”

“You started it.”

Natori Mayoi and I locked eyes in a sharp glare.

I don’t know her deal, but I’m thinking, “Saw this kind of trash talk in a battle manga recently.”

My face, of course, is dead serious.

“…Lame.”

It felt like whoever looked away first would lose, so I kept staring, but after a few seconds, she muttered that and walked back to the classroom like I was never there.

“Immature for her looks.”

Her string of childish insults says it all.

With such low tolerance for provocation, she might harass Rando-dono just for her boldness.

From what I saw today, she hasn’t completely let go of her feelings for Uryu.

But, how do I put it—she’s kind of a small fry.

Hiding behind her appearance, shielding herself with tough words—it’s not the way of the strong.

She’s the type to aim big but chicken out at the last second.

In that sense, if Rando-dono doesn’t overthink her, she’s not a real threat.

That’s my take after talking one-on-one with Natori Mayoi for the first time in a while.

I’m confident Rando-dono can handle her.

But I forgot something crucial.

Natori Mayoi usually moves with a posse, acting as their leader.

And small fries tend to show off in front of their close allies.

I failed to consider something I absolutely shouldn’t have overlooked.

Chapter 37: The Spirit of the Nurse’s Office

Right after parting with Natori Mayoi, I headed to a certain place.

I checked the note from my desk to confirm my destination.

“After school, Nurse’s Office, ☽ Tsukikage”

A straightforward code with no real twist—probably no deeper meaning to the note itself.

Wondering what she’s thinking as always, I opened the nurse’s office door.

There, sitting upright on a chair, was the girl who summoned me.

“Hey, Yukiya-kun.”

Her long, glossy black hair framed her gentle smile as she looked at me.

Unlike Kamishiro Haruka’s broad, infectious charm, she exudes a fragile, almost mystical aura.

Tsukikage Miharu, a 2nd-year student from Class D.

“No ‘hey’—what’s with this note?”

I waved the paper she likely wrote, and she softened her smile, narrowing her eyes.

“Fun, right?”

“This basic code? Fun?

Step up your game.”

“Really? If you tilt it, the crescent moon looks like a full moon.”

“No way!?”

Following Miharu’s tip, I examined the tiny paper from every angle.

Still no full moon.

This is a legit challenge—pretty exciting.

“Just kidding.”

“Hey!”

I reflexively slammed the paper to the floor, but it fluttered down slowly, which was super annoying.

This girl played my pure heart with a smug grin.

“Haha, that’s funny.”

“Only for you!”

“Can’t help it.

There were tons of reasons to tease you.”

“Ridiculous.

No one’s as upright as me—you can’t mess with me.”

“Getting cocky, huh? Classic Yukiya-kun.”

“That’s not a compliment.”

As usual, she’s merciless with that smile.

Thinks she can get away with anything by grinning?

She might charm clueless guys, but not me.

“I mean, you were helping Kirita-san with her love life, right?”

“That’s over.

How’d you know?”

“When you boldly declared you’d lecture her in class, it was obvious.

Kirita-san looked so flustered.”

Right, Miharu and Kirita Akari are in the same class.

Makes sense she’d hear about my visit to Class D.

“That’s harsh, Yukiya-kun.

Helping another girl when you’ve got me?”

“You’re not making any progress.

Even my patience is running thin.”

“Aw, no way.”

Miharu started counting her “achievements” on her fingers.

“First, I call him by his first name.

Not many girls call Uryu-kun by his name, right?”

“Guys like Kamishiro Haruka do.”

“Comparing me to Haruka-chan?

‘Ururun’ makes no sense.”

Kamishiro Haruka, your nickname just got trashed with a serene smile.

Am I the only one who respects it?

“I’ve got his contact info too.

We don’t really chat, though.”

“Then what’s the point?”

“If you had a phone, Yukiya-kun, we could’ve made a group chat.”

“You two could just talk without me.”

“Haha, nope.”

She waved her hand like my suggestion was absurd, making it clear my past lectures didn’t stick.

“We’ve eaten lunch together a few times.”

“Five times. Remember it.”

“Oh, five? Got it, got it.”

“By the way, is five actually right?”

“Think so. Something up?”

“Just that it matches the number of times I was there.”

“Duh, we’ve never eaten just the two of us.”

“…”

“…Hm?”

“…Keep going.”

Turning away from the infuriating reality, I urged Miharu to continue.

This is supposed to be about praising her efforts, but I’m not feeling it.

She seems oblivious, which makes it worse.

“We went out together once.

That puts me ahead of other girls, right?”

“Yeah, that café we went to was pretty chic.”

“Right? The pasta was so good.”

“Tsukikage-san, don’t you think something’s off?”

“Off?

Oh, you choking on your pasta?

That was hilarious.”

“That’s not it!

Was that even a thing!?”

I hit my limit.

She was so confident I thought she’d made progress without me, but look at this mess.

“Lunch, outings—all of it was with me there!?

How do you think that puts you ahead!?”

Sure, Miharu’s eaten with Uryu and gone on a “date.”

On paper, she might seem closest to being his girlfriend.

But the reality?

I was there for all of it, making it a bizarre group hangout.

Lunch even turned into a party with Kamishiro Haruka and Misono Izumo joining.

I get why Uryu jokes about needing a chaperone.

You might become friends with him at this rate, but never his girlfriend.

That’s why I’ve gotta snap her out of it.

She summoned me to spark romance, so I’ve got to guide her.

“You’ll fall behind other girls like this!

We’re in a love Sengoku era.

As long as Uryu’s single, piranhas will swarm him!”

I laid it on thick, heart hardened.

She’s staring blankly, and I’m not sure my words are sinking in, but I’ve gotta say it.

So, Tsukikage Miharu, did your mentor’s fiery words hit home!?

“Yukiya-kun, shh, keep it down in the nurse’s office, okay?”

Aaaaaah, it didn’t get throoooough!!