My Childhood Friend the Demon Knight Hates Me - Episode 42: Reiss Edition
42 Reiss Edition
Translator: Lioness
Editor: Arya
After the incident
The culprit was taken into custody by the apostles, and we returned to the church with the victims we had protected. Suria, who had collapsed and lost consciousness, was carried to her room by one of the apostles.
She slept until the day turned into evening.
I had heard that there was nothing wrong with her body, it was only due to fatigue caused by overuse of spiritual power, but I didn’t move an inch from where I was standing- in front of her room, until she woke up.
The apostle Roa, the caretaker, advised me that if I was worried, I could go into the room and stay by Suria’s side…, but even though the demonic outbursts in my body had been put to momentarily, I still had my guards up.
—- On top of that, today was the day of the full moon, which I had been dreading.
If the sky would become darker a little bit more, the night would come soon and the demons would make noises again.
Nevertheless, the spirit crystal was shattered, and the only thing that left were the shards I had collected. It was not that easy to replace, and you had to rely on the Queen’s blessing, the crystal shards, and Ricola’s sleeping potion that I’d been saving to get through the moonlit night on my own.
If I was able to pass tonight,…. All I had to do was wait for the audience with the Queen of Spirits.
Until I heard a report from the caretaker apostle who was inside that Suria had woken up.
In her room, with my back leaned against the wall next to the door, I looked at the sky through the window in the corridor, and casted a glimpse of the moon, which I could not yet track clearly.
●●●
It was night when the sky was painted black and the full moon appeared.
Like the color of my hair, I didn’t like black and especially because it reminded me of the twisted appearance of the woman who cursed me to be possessed by a demon.
I had been asked to take off my watch this evening. The windows of the room were covered with curtains, blocking any moonlight from entering.
I’d taken all the precautions I could, but I didn’t know how much power the night of the Holy Bell Festival would give to the demon.
That was what had happened during the incident. I was going to make sure that Suria was still in the room, and then go back to my room.
All I had to do was to stay indoors and wait until morning arrived.
However, after checking the lights and the people in Suria’s room from a distance through the garden window, I was on my way back to my room when the voice of the devil suddenly struck me.
The demon, which had become my voice itself, was still slowly eating away my nerves.
Aside from the outburst when the spirit crystal was shattered, I felt that the demon’s power, which had been calm since I became a guard knight, was clearly increasing, and I rushed into my room.
I threw off my cloak and kneeled on the floor beside the bed as I breathed with a lot of difficulty while clutching the crystal shard.
“Hurry and give me the soul of your loved one. Go and kill that woman.”
The malicious voice that had been whispering to me over and over again for the past two years, and that I had rebuffed each time it happened, echoed directly into my brain.
My chest tingled as my body trembled slightly.
The demon in me was definitely enjoying the full moon night of the Holy Bell Festival, where its shackles were loosened.
The only reason I had been able to keep my sanity and continue controlling my body was because the Queen’s blessing was my last resort.
I slightly wobbled and reached for the bag of Ricola’s sleeping pills next to the pillow on my bed.
… I hope this helps the demon sleep.
As I prayed, I emptied several small bottles. However, the demon’s presence, which usually subsided, did not recede for a moment.
“Ow!”
As I tightened my grip to the piece of the crystal sharp, its black tip pierced my palm and I felt pain. The red blood dripping from my palm brought back memories of that day.
The memories that had been sealed away by the demoness came back, and those peaceful days disappeared from my hand- that awful day.
In order to reject the whispers of the devil, I spit out the words that denied my feelings for Suria.
“No, no, no, no! I don’t like that woman. I don’t like her, I hate her! That’s why I’m going to …!”
So stop it.
Please don’t do this.
Don’t touch Suria.
I couldn’t tell you how many times I’d done this. I threw away the spirit crystal, which seemed to have reached its limit of tolerance, and picked up the vial that still had its contents. I slurp down the flowery liquid that she once told me was ‘just like my eyes’ with a smile.
As I rolled the empty bottle on the floor, the fearlessness of the demon crawling around inside me finally faded a little.
“…. Almost there. Almost there. Just a little bit more, please. And then we can end this. I promised her it wouldn’t matter if I died. I’m sure the Queen will end me, the demons and all. Just a little longer. I beg you, hold on.”
I let out a muffled voice, as if I were telling myself something in a choppy voice.
The day after tomorrow, —-, Suria and I will be heading towards the Forest of the Holy Bell.
So I’d have to lie to her again.
I have to lie to her again, saying that I had another job to do as soon as I’m done as an escort knight. So when the audience is over, I am to return to the main church alone. This is the last time you and I will be working together in this forest.
I need to spit out the lines I’d prepared, I need to send Suria home alone and have a private place with the Queen.
And I’m going to … have the Queen kill the demon inside me.
“Ha! …”
I took a breath, feeling the bitterness in my throat as I finished swallowing the red liquid.
If one held your chest, they would have the illusion that a demon was breathing there, and they would feel a faint nausea.
The … chief apostle once told me not to give up on the path to my salvation, but I didn’t feel like I could separate the demon that I had assimilated so well from me anymore.
The words ‘don’t give up’ had been thrown towards me a lot in the past two years.
At the end of the day, the only choice I had left was to take the demon down with me.
I dropped an inaudible murmur that I’m fine.
I’d already prepared myself for this and am ready for it.
I’d already asked the head of the Apostles to make sure that all of my rewards as an escort knight would be sent to Director Allan’s orphanage after I die. I’d never been able to thank him directly for saving my life, but I wonder if I could return the favor, even if it was just a little at the end.
In that case, I would have to go on a long mission and pretend I lost my life there. It would be a long time before Director Alan and Suria would know that I was no longer with them.
I took the time to think it through, and I made this move beforehand.
Now all I had to do was ask the Queen to end it all. … No, before that, I had to say goodbye to Suria in a nonchalant manner, as per the lines I prepared in the Forest of the Holy Bell.
“If we part here, you and I will never see each other again.”
Those decisive words of farewell, to Suria.
I had to say it.
“……!”
This was the first time that I’d ever seen such a thing. It was not asleep yet, and the pain was stronger than the tingling of demons, and now it brought up my shallow and ugly greed, full of self-love that I should have abandoned.
The … truth is…
I don’t … want to die.
I still want to live. I’m afraid to die. I want to hang on to my life, even if it’s shameful.
And if I could, I’d like to stay by Suria’s side forever and ever.
I don’t want to disappear, and then Suria would belong to someone I don’t know.
I don’t want anyone else to have her.
I want to touch her, to hold her, to tell her how I feel about her.
I wanted to live with Suria.
It was … pathetic, self-mockery that leaked out.
The mere thought of an impending audience with the Queen, feeling my nearing death, and the thought of leaving Suria forever was enough to make my heart waver so easily.
In truth, nothing had been thrown away.
I was terrified of dying, I still wanted to be with Suria, I still wanted her for myself. There was no way I could give up my greed.
I’m not sure that I would ever be able to say goodbye to Suria in a calm manner like this.
But … still.
“…!”
I bit my lip tightly.
The devil finally fell asleep, and its disturbed mind regained a sense of calmness.
When I closed my eyelids in the dimly lit room, I saw Surya’s pale blue eyes, which I thought were the most beautiful of all, just as they were when I was a child and still were today.
Even if I’m shaken, I could deceive myself and rebuild myself as many times as long as I could see in those eyes the fear and despair of being killed by me.
If I couldn’t get rid of my greed, I forced myself to swallow it this time as I stood in front of her without showing my true feelings until the end.
As I repeated my shallow breathing, the voice of Suria, who softly called my name “Reiss.”, revived in the back of my ear.
— If I could only wish for one of them.
Suria … Suu.
There were words I’ve always wanted to say to you. However, neither of them… would be possible to say out loud.
I still regreted that I didn’t give you an answer when you asked me, “Am I happy?”
I should have nodded my head and told you that I was the happiest because I met you, even if it was embarrassing.
My body slumped.
When I collapsed against the bed behind me, I felt like I could finally surrender myself to a comfortable sleep.
“When it’s all over, I’m finally going to tell Suria—
I love you.”
I don’t care if you don’t get it.
But yes, can I express it in words?
(TL: Please…. I cried…)
Author’s Note:
This is the end of the Reiss chapters.
The next chapters will be the conclusion. Please stay with me for a while longer if you can.