Magic Maker - How to make magic in another world - - Chapter 4

Magic Maker – How to make magic in another world –

Chapter 4   Transparent days

In the following two years,

I decided to study about the other world.

First, I learned to read and write the characters.

The language in this world sounds like Japanese. Or rather, it resembles Japanese.

But the characters are unique to this world, so I needed to learn them anew.

Marie seemed to have started at the age of five, but I decided to start at three.

I asked Mom to teach me.

Most of the studying seemed to be taught by Mom.

Our family, the Ornstein family, has a long lineage and seems to have a relatively long history.

Both Dad and Mom, being nobles, received an education, so they taught us various things.

In six months, I learned basic reading and writing. Marie seemed to take a bit longer.

Perhaps because of a child’s body, the memory was good. On top of that, having an adult’s memory allowed for efficient learning.

Apart from reading and writing, I learned general knowledge.

It was to absorb knowledge necessary for daily life.

The monetary system, simple laws, geography, and history were the main focus.

The Ornstein family is located in the Etten region in the western part of the Lystia country.

It’s a rural area, so the population is small. As a result, the territory is vast and suitable for agriculture.

Though it’s rural, there’s a relatively large city nearby.

There’s only one nearby, and I haven’t been there yet.

Dad won’t permit it. He says it’s dangerous.

I studied as much as I could within the confines of the house.

And then, I found out.

In this world, indeed, magic doesn’t exist.

The very word ‘magic’ is nonexistent.

I clung to the hope that Dad and Mom just didn’t know.

There was a possibility of that. The world is vast, and there might be magic in places they don’t know.

But that wasn’t common, and Dad came from another country and apparently traveled through various countries when he was young.

Moreover, I was told that magic was absent in every country.

For two years, I fought desperately.

I studied. I took action.

I think it was an obsession.

I couldn’t give up.

I didn’t want to believe that there was no magic.

But I ended up understanding.

Magic doesn’t exist in this world. That’s the reality.

There was no information suggesting otherwise.

Day by day, I was forced to understand a little bit more.

And then.

At the age of five, I lost my purpose to live.

If I were still alive in Japan, I might have lived aimlessly and tried to find ordinary happiness.

But I was reincarnated.

Because I was reincarnated, I thought I would walk a new path in life.

However, it wasn’t about resetting everything and enjoying this world or redoing my life.

Because, I didn’t have any regrets.

I was just disappointed.

But when I was reincarnated into another world, I had hope.

I thought maybe I could use magic.

That hope was shattered.

Twice.

If there’s someone else who’s been reincarnated, I want them to tell me if they’re positive about starting a new life.

I wonder why they can do that.

Even if I’m reborn, I’m still me.

I have memories of the past. Even as a child, I have memories of being an adult. I have a personality.

To live, you need hope. You need purpose.

If that’s lost, can you really find the will to live again just because you’ve been reset?

All that’s left are memories of what I’ve built.

Death is the end. Not the beginning.

Even if life comes after death, it doesn’t mean the past is gone, and you can start anew.

I am still me.

I remained the dreamer I was.

Since I understood that there’s no magic, I became apathetic.

I lost all motivation, and before I knew it, I was just drifting, my expressions becoming dull.

I don’t initiate conversations.

Even now, I just watch my sister running in the courtyard.

She’s still doing the same thing even at seven. This sister of mine.

Physically, she should have grown, but…

I’ve also grown quite a bit in two years.

My body moves as I wish, and my physical abilities have improved.

But what does that mean?

I don’t feel joy in such things.

It’s just about being less inconvenient.

“Woah! Here I go!”

My sister is energetic.

She runs around shouting, and recently, she’s been wielding a wooden sword, practicing swings.

Apparently, Marīe’s current obsession is swordsmanship.

It seems that Father, thinking it might be useful for a girl to know swordsmanship in case of need, occasionally gives her guidance.

It’s probably not a world where girls should be delicate, or maybe it’s just Father’s way of thinking.

I watch from afar. I don’t have the energy to move around with her.

I sit at the edge of the courtyard and stay still.

What am I doing?

As I let out a deep sigh, Marīe comes running up to me.

“I got faster, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, you did.”

“See! I’ll get even faster and stronger! Watch me!”

“Sure, do your best.”

“Yeah! I’ll give it my all!”

I wonder how she can be so enthusiastic.

What is she aiming for?

I don’t really understand.

But I guess that’s how children are.

If you think too much, you end up like me.

I wonder if living according to emotions without much thought would be enjoyable.

Seems impossible for me, though.

“Okay! I’m off!”

My sister started running again.

It’s been like this for a while now.

Since Marīe was about three years old, she has been running around outside constantly.

If this were a different era, she might have become a track and field athlete.

However, there are no such sports in this world.

I wonder where she’s heading.

That’s something I don’t understand.

○●○

Family gathering time.

While we all sat down to eat, I chewed my food without really thinking.

I had become rather indifferent towards the taste.

I was starting to feel like it didn’t matter.

As I quietly progressed through my meal, the family’s conversation continued.

“So, by the way Marie, how’s your studying going? Making progress?”

“I’m doing my best, both in swordsmanship and studying!”

“Oh, really?”

Dad glanced at Mom briefly.

“Well, she’s doing her best.”

“I see, doing her best, huh?”

Though it was a somewhat ambiguous way of saying it, Marie herself didn’t notice.

Indeed, she was doing her best. However, it seemed she wasn’t suited for studying; it wasn’t progressing as fast.

She was learning to read, write, and do basic arithmetic, but I was much further ahead.

It seemed Marie was better suited for moving her body than using her head.

Her athletic skills were exceptional.

“And how about you, Shion?”

I didn’t have the energy to reply, so I just stayed silent.

Seeing Dad’s troubled expression, it pained my heart.

“Y-Yes, Shion is incredibly smart. he’s advanced up to the middle school level.”

“Really!? Our child is a genius!”

Seeing her parents laugh heartily, Marie puffs her cheeks.

“I’m a genius too!”

Well, I’m not so sure about that.

I’m not a genius. I’m just doing my best with the memories of an adult.

I mean, reaching middle school level with three-digit calculations is nothing extraordinary.

If it’s just arithmetic, I might be a genius. I mean, as long as I can do basic arithmetic.

Even the memories of history and literacy are just memorization.

For those who survived the exam wars, it’s a piece of cake.

If I had to start from scratch, learning everyday language, I think I’d struggle a lot.

“Haha, that’s right. Marie is a genius too!”

“Hehe, that’s right!”

Marie, who quickly regained her mood, smiled contentedly.

They are a good family. They are all kind-hearted.

But I can’t be part of that circle.

I can tell that everyone is looking out for me.

Without asking what’s wrong, they’re just waiting for me.

Encouraging me, talking to me, protecting me.

I can see that, yet I can’t do anything but pass time aimlessly.

It’s pathetic.

Even though I’m the oldest among them.

I’m the most childish. In heart and body.

I can’t go on like this.

It’s not like I don’t have magic.

It’s because I’ve been yearning for it for so long.

It’s time I realized.

It’s time I gave up.

I need to accept reality.

This boring reality.