In a World of Reversed Chastity, I’m Rumored to Be an Easy Bitch (♂) Among Lustful Girls - 16

Chapter 16: If I Cut My Bangs, Will That Person Finally Notice Me?

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◆ Hinayo’s POV

“Hey, since you’ve got such pretty eyes, why don’t you try cutting your bangs?”

That one line Hirakawa-kun said in the heat of the moment stuck with me ever since.

Because all my life, people had told me my eyes were “intense” and “scary.” They even asked me things like “Are you mad?”  

With my sharp, almond-shaped eyes, relatives used to say I looked like a Hina doll and was pretty when I was little, but I quickly realized it was all just empty flattery. Over time, I grew uncomfortable meeting people’s gazes, so I let my bangs grow out to avoid eye contact altogether. For someone to call my complex “lovely”… It was obvious to me he was just flattering me. Hirakawa-kun didn’t really mean it. He was just a kind-hearted guy who said it to keep the mood light. …But even knowing it was flattery, my heart fluttered.

When someone you kinda like says something like that, anyone would fall for it, right? It’s not like I’m easy or anything!

While I mulled over that, Hirakawa-kun started undressing me. I never thought a guy would gently take the lead with a gloomy, ugly girl like me outside of manga. I didn’t have a good face, and my body was pathetic too.

A flat, unfeminine body like this… No guy would be happy to see it. Yet he stroked me gently, so focused on his caress. I found myself easily getting addicted to his soft touch.

I think… I’m really going to start getting the wrong idea. 

“Ah… S-Sorry, I got a bit too eager, huh?”

“N-No, no, it’s not that. I… I’m super flat, like, my body is so pathetic… Y-You’ll definitely lose interest, Hirakawa-kun, you can’t possibly get excited with this, so… Maybe today’s not…”

“That’s not true. Here, feel this… Can you tell how hard I am…?”

With that, Hirakawa-kun took my right hand and pressed it against his crotch.

Huh…? This is… a guy’s…? It’s so hard and hot…? And… Isn’t it a bit too big…?

“That’s right, Nishimeya-san. Your erotic expression got me all aroused.”

“Hau…”  

What is this guy??? Doesn’t he understand girls’ weak spots way too well??? It’s common knowledge that guys don’t get excited just from looking at a girl’s body or face. But if he is reacting like this even to someone like me… Someone ugly and pathetic like me… I won’t be able to endure it any longer.

My mind was boiling over. I couldn’t think straight anymore.   During the act, all I could manage in response to anything he said was “Hau…” or “More…” and in the end, we went twice in the nurse’s office. I floated in a hazy bliss, realizing that connecting with someone could feel so mentally and physically fulfilling. 

And so, I graduated from virginity. This might’ve been the best point of my life. I could die happy tomorrow. Even after getting home, Hirakawa-kun stayed on my mind.

Becoming one with the person I ‘wuv’ feels like a dream.

“Hau…”

Recalling it, I comforted myself just once. The memory was just that erotic. But once I snapped back to reality, I realized something. While it was good that I could lose my virginity with someone I liked, with Hirakawa-kun, but… Thinking back, I was practically blackmailing him into doing it with me, right…?

That meant we weren’t lovers. We weren’t even friends with benefits. There was a chance this could be the end of it, and we’d drift apart after this. I didn’t want that. Even if we couldn’t do anything erotic, I absolutely couldn’t handle Hirakawa-kun turning his back on me.

…No, not being able to do erotic stuff with him might be unbearable too. So what should I do? What could I do?

Before I could think it through, I’d grabbed a pair of scissors. My bangs—the ones I’d grown out to avoid eye contact because of my complex about my gaze…

I decided to cut them.

“Hey, since you’ve got such pretty eyes, why don’t you try cutting your bangs?”

Even if I got fooled by those words, that was fine. Even if cutting them led to getting teased about my eyes again, I didn’t care. By cutting my bangs, I wanted to show, “I’m taking Hirakawa-kun’s words to heart.” I watched YouTube and clumsily mimicked a bang-cutting tutorial video. My vision became incredibly clear, and when I looked in the mirror, my eyes met my own gaze.

“…Will he call them lovely again?”

With a mix of huge anxiety and a tiny bit of hope, I faced the next day.

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The moment I got to school, the classroom was abuzz. Feeling like everyone’s words might hurt me, I immediately blasted the Sakanaction song through my earphones to block them out.

Sakanaction is so cool~

I could block the sound, but the stares still got to me. It was even more apparent without my bangs. Everyone was looking at me.

This is probably what they call curious stares.  

They must’ve thought ‘the gloomy, ugly girl cut her bangs and was glaring at them.’ That must be what they were thinking. But it didn’t matter. As long as my feelings reached Hirakawa-kun, that was enough.

Tap tap  

Suddenly, someone tapped my left shoulder. I turned around, expecting Hirakawa-kun—but it was his best friend, Fujisaki-kun. Tall, sharp, simple and clear face. He had a rather laid-back personality, but his body was toned from basketball club activity. He was a so-called lean, buff guy. Since he was always next to Hirakawa-kun, I knew a fair bit about him. But we’d barely ever interacted. What could he want? I took out my left earphone.

“Nishimeya-san, you cut your bangs, huh?”

“Uh, ah… Y-Y-Y-Yes…”

“It totally changes your vibe and makes you look brighter. It looks really great.”

“Hau…”

Before Hirakawa-kun could see me, I got an unexpected reaction from Fujisaki-kun. Cutting my bangs seemed to leave a really good impression. It might’ve been the first time a guy spoke to me outside of basic school stuff. A little later, Fujisaki-kun brought over Hirakawa-kun, who’d just arrived. The first thing he said to me was…

“See? I told you cutting your bangs would be better for you.”

My head was so full, all I could manage was a pathetic “Hauu…”

Cutting my bangs was worth it. No, I mustn’t get complacent.  Hirakawa-kun said I still had room to grow. I needed to work harder to improve myself. I became more determined to shed my gloomy, ugly girl image.

…I needed to find more ways to connect with Hirakawa-kun. Before I knew it, I’d completely fallen into the swamp of this plain guy, Asahi Hirakawa-kun. My head was full with the thoughts of him.

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