Chapter 3: Life Advice with a Saint

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Adventurers should not get involved with nobles. This was something that adventurers who had been promoted to Copper Rank or higher were constantly lectured about, and I, like everyone else, had kept it firmly in mind. Nobles tended to be selfish people.

To put it simply, they thought of adventurers as replaceable consumables.

“Go capture that bird from the southern islands alive. While you’re at it, bring back some perpetual ice from the northern mountains. You’re adventurers, so you can manage that much, right? If you can’t, then die.”

That was basically how it went. They had no consideration whatsoever for our circumstances, and a mindset like, “I’m a noble, so you should be grateful I even spoke to you. How dare you ask for money?” was widespread. Even I, a hardcore masochist, didn’t particularly want to get involved with them.

They really didn’t get it. A master was respected because they properly took care of their dog. Someone who didn’t take care of you at all and instead said, “See? I talked to you. You’re happy, right?” while dumping trouble on you wasn’t someone I’d enjoy dealing with.

But what if an absurdly beautiful woman treated you like that?

……Well. Yeah. I mean… I guess I could accept that. It definitely could happen for sure.

“I think I understand the situation roughly. It’s probably a political power struggle between the Crown Prince’s faction and the Second Prince’s faction.”

“So it really comes down to that, huh…”

When I returned home and consulted Marianne, who had come back from the orphanage, she answered almost immediately. She was one of fewer than ten people in the Order who bore the title of Saint. Among them, Marianne—who specialized in anti-demonic abilities—had been ordered by the current Cardinal to meet us, which was how we first crossed paths.

In terms of factions, she was one of the top two figures in the Cardinal’s camp. It was fair to say she was under the protection of the de facto highest authority. She rarely used it, but if she wished, she could mobilize enough force to bring down an entire royal capital.

Of course, that would result in a battle on an absurd scale, paralyzing the entire kingdom and instantly plunging it into an era of warring powers. So Marianne would never want that. In any case, unlike a backerless country bumpkin like me, Marianne possessed enough power to survive sticking her nose into politics.

Which meant she knew politics well.

“The Crown Prince’s faction has been steadily absorbing his younger siblings and expanding its influence, while the Second Prince’s faction hasn’t been doing well. It’s obvious they’re going to be painted over entirely, and some even derisively call them a sinking ship.”

“So they moved to crush them before they could spread their reach any further… Is that it?”

“Broadly speaking, yes.”

Ugh. How boring.

From a commoner’s perspective like mine, it was hard to understand wanting the throne badly enough to try to kill your own family. If the Forest Bear had been left alone, those girls would have unquestionably been wiped out. And that would’ve been fine as long as it shook the political board even a little?

A princess getting eaten by a monster in the forest was a seriously dangerous incident no matter how you looked at it… Huh? In that case, who would be made the villain? Logically, it would be whoever gave permission or orders for them to go into the forest.

Would that be the Guild? They said they were registered adventurers, so it was probably the Guild. But why target the Guild?

…Man, this is getting confusing.

“It was fortunate that they were saved. Thanks to that, the Church can intervene.”

“Really? I thought I might’ve caused trouble for everyone…”

“Not at all! Many lives were spared. This was unquestionably your achievement, Finn.”

If she put it that way… Then I guess she was right. Marianne said so, after all. Still, a princess, huh. I didn’t particularly want any connection with royalty, so I’d be happy if she just forgot about me… But that was probably impossible.

“My policy is to avoid getting involved with nobles if possible… But I suppose that’s impossible now?”

“If it were a marquis’s faction, we could’ve managed something… But this time, it’s Her Highness the Princess…”

Yeah. Figures.

So this meant I was officially a noble’s errand boy now. At least I didn’t have to worry about dragging my companions into it. Everyone except me would be fine no matter what nobles ordered them to do. Carla’s fame was too great for anyone to touch her, Marianne was impossible for the reasons mentioned earlier since it would mean war with the Church, and Astrea was an elf whose base was her homeland. She could ignore nobles entirely without consequence.

I had a mentor (more or less), but I wasn’t exactly advertising those connections. Would that person even protect me? That person was probably too busy dealing with their childhood friend, honestly.

“Well, I’ll manage somehow. Thanks, Marianne.”

“…You’re not planning to deal with this alone, are you?”

“Of course I am. It wouldn’t be right to drag you all into this.”

A mere noble factional dispute was already dangerous enough. There was no way I could involve them in a royal succession struggle. Even if they had stronger backing than I did, once the royal family was involved, it was a different story. And there was the possibility that the Second Prince might get involved. The Second Prince was someone who didn’t hesitate to get a princess killed. 

I genuinely didn’t care what happened to me. Honestly, I’d welcome any pain. But I couldn’t tolerate my companions getting hurt.

…No, I probably could get excited. But somehow, if I got excited about that, it felt like I’d be finished as a human being. I was a masochist but before that, I was human. There were lines you weren’t supposed to cross. And since I knew that, I would never cross them!

『Is that really true?』

M-Ma… Marianne!?

『Don’t you actually want us to suffer terribly?』

Don’t say something so stupid!

More than anything else—well, with the exception of enjoying a few hits—I cared about you all! You getting hurt!? There was no way I could allow that! I would absolutely protect you… As a shield, as a man!

…So then, what exactly would that look like? Tell me, Marianne of the darkness lurking in my heart.

“…From your perspective, Finn, do we really seem that unreliable?”

Huh!? Which one was it?! Which Marianne was this!? Ah, she looked sad. So it was definitely the real Marianne. Or rather, the Marianne of light.

“No… If anything, I think I’m the one relying on you all way too much…”

I didn’t even need to explain how much I relied on them, but let me list it plainly.

First of all…

This place we lived in… It was an offering to the Church from someone who wanted to sell cheaply to Marianne, whose fame as the Saint of Holy Smite had grown. Compared to when I used to stay in starter inns or stables no matter how much money I had, I might as well have been completely dependent on her for my living foundation.

The reason I chose those places back then was because they were filthy and unpleasant, and living in that environment excited me, but I wasn’t about to say that.

Second…

The fact that I could immerse myself in my fetish during combat without hesitation was absolutely thanks to my companions. As a hardcore masochist, being able to take near-fatal injuries casually while feeling my life in danger was incredibly satisfying. Honestly, the fact that they treated a flimsy meat shield like me as a full-fledged companion instead of throwing me away meant I couldn’t complain even if I was called a parasite.

“I’ve only got this body to be proud of. I don’t have the power to cut enemies down in one strike like Carla, or to envelop everyone with wind like Astrea. Of course, I don’t have healing powers or the ability to slay demons either. That’s why I don’t want to be a burden to the people who still call me their companion.”

Yeah. That was the honest truth. If I got abandoned, I’d probably get insanely excited but after more than five years together, there was no way they’d throw me away now. If anything did happen, it’d probably be after they found out I was a hardcore masochist. Getting expelled from a party was apparently trendy these days. There’d just been an expulsion drama in a Gold Rank party the other day and tomorrow, it could be me. I couldn’t afford to get complacent.

Maybe even today, some up-and-coming rookie would walk into the Adventurers’ Guild and say, “We’ll replace you with someone normal instead of a pervert like him”—

Ah, ahhh! My brain is breaking! This pleasure is bad! This is NOT okay!

“Don’t say that! We’ve only made it this far because you were with us, Finn!”

“I’m glad you say that. But it’s fine. …I know. I’m the most useless one.”

“Stop it!”

!!!!?!?!?!

H-Hah… Hah… So soft… Smells so good… This is the smell of a saint… Stop it, idiot! Don’t look at your companion like that! No, but isn’t it too late already?! I’m getting excited just from being worried about!!! Dammit, calm down, you flesh shield below my waist!!

“I—I mean, we would never think that way! So please, Finn, stop hating yourself…!”

Huh…? No, I didn’t hate myself. I thought I was a shameful existence, sure—but there was a time when my childhood friend told me that even someone as disgusting as me was allowed to live. Otherwise, there was no way I’d have come to the city and openly indulged in hardcore masochism.

I deserved death and insults. I wouldn’t deny that part. But this and that was a separate issue entirely. I had no hesitation in affirming myself. Still, Marianne’s warmth was irresistible, so I decided to just answer normally.

“Thank you, Marianne…”

When I hugged her back tightly, she squeezed me even harder. But did I really look that troubled? I should reflect on that a bit. Being worried about during battle and being seen as constantly anxious in daily life were different things… I should try harder again.

~*~*~*~

Why are we… Why are we this powerless?

When I first met him, he was still a boy. His back wasn’t broad like it was now, and he struggled to carry a shield far too large for his body.

『I can only do this much.』

He said that and accepted the role of meat wall without hesitation, and there were almost no battles where he didn’t get hurt. Of course it hurt. Of course it was painful. And yet, he never complained once. Offering his body for our sake… And back then, all I could do was use a simple Heal, leaving scars all over his body…

『Don’t I look like a battle-hardened warrior?』

He said that so as not to hurt me for being unable to heal him fully, but sometimes his wounds festered and he burned with fever. You probably thought you were hiding it, but I noticed. And yet, there was nothing I could do. We had no money to buy healing potions.

If only I could’ve used High Heal, I could’ve restored not just his wounds, but his stamina too. I was powerless. That pain…. It was painful. It was heartbreaking. I wanted to help, but even so, even then…

I couldn’t save the person I wanted to save most. 

『If Finn were to die so easily like this….』

Astrea’s words flashed through my mind, and I unconsciously tightened my grip.

Warm…

We were who we were now because Finn was there. No matter what anyone said, that fact didn’t change. No matter how much we denied it, rumors about a party of three women and one man were unavoidable, so we limited ourselves to simply denying and talking back.

That was probably a mistake. Our strength wasn’t what it used to be. There were only a handful of people in the entire world who could kill Carla, who had reached the level of Sword Saint. And there were hardly any who could suppress the authority of a Saint like me. And Astrea, being a High Elf, was essentially royalty among humans. It went without saying no one could touch her either.

Until now, we hadn’t wielded that power. Because I believed that, as a Saint, it wasn’t something to use lightly. But if that restraint was what cornered Finn…

Unforgivable… The people who belittled Finn… Us, who relied on Finn too much… Us, who Finn couldn’t rely on….

And more than anything…

I couldn’t forgive myself, who kept causing him pain.

Now that Finn had formed a connection with Charlotte Bernstein, the Second Princess, it was certain he’d be dragged into trouble. Then we would ride that wave with everything we had. I would use my power as a Saint without restraint, and Carla and Astrea would do the same to protect Finn. They would never refuse.

Finn Debyura had earned that much.

I won’t let anyone interfere anymore. Finn… I will protect you.

Saint of Holy Smite. The spearhead of her holy blow was aimed toward the royal capital, where malice swirled.

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