I’d Rather Be Healed by a Pure-Hearted, Beautiful Demon Lord Than by a Yandere Saintess! ~Even if I Run Away, the Yandere Saintess Keeps Coming After Me. If I Get Caught, It Seems Like I’ll Be Forced Into an Engagement!?~ - Chapter 13

An Overly Mundane Secret Plan

“”””Ooooooh!!””””

The roar that echoed through the Demon King’s castle announced the start of the battle.

With Lady Lucilphia’s declaration of war, the Demon King’s army plunged into full combat readiness in an instant. Everyone burned with fighting spirit and eagerly gripped their weapons.

…Or so it seemed.

The next day, the faces of the executives gathered in the strategy room were uniformly grim.

“The Holy Knights’ forces are estimated at three times our own. Moreover, knights blessed by the Saint can match ten of our soldiers single-handedly.”

…Isn’t the power gap hopelessly lopsided right from the start?

“Furthermore, the Saint Erixia’s personal power remains unknown. Rumors say she wields holy magic capable of destroying an entire country on her own.”

…At that point, isn’t she at a level where she could end a war by herself?

“Hmm… If we clash head-on, our annihilation is inevitable nine times out of ten.”

Necros’s overly calm analysis wrapped the meeting room in heavy silence.

The fervor from yesterday seemed like a lie.

Even the muscle-headed Borgannon groaned, “Mmm… This is a bad matchup, isn’t it?”

In that utterly hopeless situation, naturally, everyone’s gazes pierced straight at me.

“”””Lord Yukina, what should we do?””””

“You always dump it on me!”

My inner voice slipped out unbidden, but no one paid it any mind.

“Lord Yukina, we seek to borrow the wisdom of you, our strategist.”

“That’s right, Lord Yukina! You outmaneuvered that Saint before, so surely you have a plan to turn this situation around!”

…Listen! I’ve told you how many times that I didn’t outmaneuver the Saint—I just ran away!

But by now, no one believed my words anymore. Fine then. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

I’d play the part of the know-it-all strategist to the hilt.

I cleared my throat once and crossed my arms with exaggerated authority.

“Everyone, please calm down. Battles aren’t decided by numbers alone.”

“”””Oh!””””

Something shifted in everyone’s eyes. No turning back now.

I desperately recalled the personality of the person known as Saint Erixia. She was a perfectionist. And she had high pride. She never doubted that she was always right and beautiful.

“First, let’s consider the enemy’s aims. Saint Erixia’s goal is to ‘rescue’ me. In other words, she wants to maintain the facade of being the ‘righteous savior.'”

“Hoh, the facade, eh?”

“Yes. That means she won’t resort to brutal tactics like indiscriminately massacring the people of the Demon King’s territory. Her true enemies are the ‘evil Demon King’s army’ that ‘seduced’ me—us, in other words.”

“I see…! So the attack targets are limited.”

Lilith nodded in admiration.

Good, they’re hooked.

“Next, her personality. She’s an extreme narcissist who loves the dramatic. She surely wants to get lost in the theatrics of rescuing me.”

“H-Hoh…?”

“Yes. So she won’t launch a full assault right away. She’ll start by sending in a small advance party to probe our defenses while gradually applying pressure. That way, she gets to play the ‘righteous Saint chipping away at the forces of evil.'”

For some reason, my biased and arbitrary character assessment of Erixia left the executives shuddering in awe: “So profound…!” “He’s perfectly read the enemy commander’s psyche…!”

No, it’s just a personality profile.

“So, what should we do?”

In response to Necros’s question, I answered with feigned confidence while inwardly sweating bullets.

“—We should make maximum use of the terrain advantage.”

“The terrain?”

“Yes. This is our land, the Demon King’s territory. We know every river that flows and every cliff that drops. The enemy knows nothing. We can’t afford not to use this edge.”

I spread out the map and pointed to the forest leading to the Demon King’s castle.

“We’ll set traps throughout this forest.”

“Traps, you say?”

“Yes. But not ordinary traps. The goal isn’t to kill or wound the enemy. It’s to thoroughly wear down their stamina… and their morale with insidious, petty, underhanded traps.”

What came to mind were the mundane harassment tactics my grandpa had used to drive off monkeys and boars that ravaged the village fields.

“For example, scattering overly slippery mucus all over the ground.”

“Hoh.”

“Spreading spores from flowers with an awfully foul stench.”

“Hoh hoh.”

“Placing hallucinogenic mushrooms everywhere…”

As I listed every petty, cheap harassment tactic I could think of, the executives’ faces gradually lit up.

“Incredible…! Traps specialized in neutralizing and confusing the enemy without killing them! That way, we grind down their morale!”

“How clever! Wearing down the foe without spilling blood… Truly a plan worthy of Lord Yukina♡”

“Hmm… Mucus, foul odors, hallucinations… With my magic, I can amplify those effects a hundredfold. Splendid, truly splendid harassment… Heh heh heh…!”

Necros began shaking with an evil grin. It seemed my mundane secret plan was about to form the worst possible marriage with the Demon King’s army’s twisted ingenuity.

“Alright, it’s decided!”

Lady Lucilphia slammed the table with a bang!

Her face had shifted from anxiety to one brimming with confidence and mischievous delight.

“Proclaim to the entire army! From this moment, we launch Operation: Insidious Traps Against the Saint! Command will be… entrusted entirely to our strategist, Yukina!”

“Eeeeeh!?”

And so, my grandpa’s handed-down pest control measures ballooned into a full-scale defensive operation mobilizing the entire Demon King’s army.

Saint, my condolences. A battle way off from anything you imagined is about to begin.