Chapter 10.2 – It Won’t End Cleanly

“So, if we don’t take the drug, we won’t die? We’ll live forever?”

“Can nobodies like us really make a name for ourselves in battle?”

“Sure, it’s brutal on the body, but training hurts just as much. What’s wrong with relying on drugs?

Gaikaku’s subordinates could almost see the logic.

Even so, actually doing it was insane.

The fact that twenty of them had done it at once felt downright surreal to the women.

“…That drug was sealed away because junkies like you abused it. In proper doses it’s barely harmful at all.”

Yet Gaikaku knew.

There would always be people like this.

“So a drug’s cheating, is it?”

“It’s fine to wear weapons and armor, fine to snipe with arrows or spells, fine to gang-up, fine to kill—”

“—but drugs alone are off-limits? Don’t think so.”

And these men were exactly that type.

Convinced they had nothing to be ashamed of, they swung their oversized weapons to show off.

“If that’s your credo, fine. We’ve got ogres. Even with puffed-up muscles you’ll barely break even. Once my hundred humans jump in…”

“Ha-ha-ha-ha! Right! These twenty barely match average ogres! Good enough for the baron’s troops, but equal ogres? Let alone the Knight Order? Impossible!”

Gaikaku looked bored; Tanlou was buzzing.

“This special brew was meant to fell Knights, but perfect for a field test. Use it!”

“Hmph… acting all high and mighty. Fine, I’ll use it.”

“Shame they’re women, but against ogres that’s fair enough.”

“Picking off muscleheads with this stuff—best feeling ever!”

The thugs called the Tanlou Squad jabbed injectors into their exposed flesh.

Moments later their muscles pulsed, swelling and contracting like a grotesque dance.

Their pulses were visible; veins ballooned fit to burst.

Already freakish bodies grew even more grotesque.

Gaikaku immediately understood.

“Instant-boost serum—short duration, stacks on top of normal enhancers—also illegal.”

“Ha-ha! So you do know! Diligent, splendid! That means you know you can’t stop it!”

Still scrawny, Tanlou boasted, flaunting his drug.

“Normally the Tanlou Squad matches a standard ogre; right now they’re several times stronger! Twenty of them could swallow even the Knight Order!”

“…Hard to believe. Mind if I say one thing?”

Gaikaku laughed.

“What is it—begging for your life? I won’t listen. Still want to talk?”

“No, I’m done with you. Ogre squad—you know what to do.”

He signaled to his ogre heavy infantry.

“Use it.”

“…Yes.”

Mirroring their foes, the ogres jabbed injectors into the thick leather that covered their bodies.

Their muscles surged exactly like the Tanlou Squad’s.

Seeing it, Tanlou and his men panicked.

“Wh-what?! How can you use that?!”

“I did tell you I’m a genius. Of course I can brew this stuff.”

“Th-that’s…?!”

Ogres using instant-boost serum—unthinkable.

Tanlou lost it; his men were no calmer.

“Y-you kidding me?! Ogres need drugs?!”

“Only Tanlou can make this! This is wrong!”

“I don’t get it!”

They’d planned to overpower ogres—and were stunned when the ogres did the same.

“Hey, that serum doesn’t cause memory loss, you know?”

Gaikaku taunted them.

“Who said using drugs wasn’t cheating but an honor?”

“Th-that was…!”

“You knew it was cheap. That’s why you whine when the enemy uses it too.”

If they truly thought it fair, they’d celebrate a level field.

They didn’t want a worthy fight—they wanted a curb-stomp.

“Well, numbers, drugs, performance—almost even. Ladies, tear ’em apart!”

“Right, Boss!”

“T-Tanlou Squad, please—do it! They’re women!”

“B-but—!”

“If you run I’m dead! Then who’ll supply your drugs? Who’ll treat the side effects?!”

“D-damn iiiit!”

And so the two camps of muscleheads clashed.

On one side, nearly naked, drug-enhanced human men; on the other, shaggy, armor-clad, drug-enhanced ogre women.

Both swung weapons no normal human could lift, so fast they blurred.

Muscle monsters collided, thunder echoing around.

[Ku-kwaaaa?!]

“Quit screeching. Human infantry—secure the area.”

Once the main forces locked, Gaikaku reminded his hundred female infantry to stick to the plan.

“These meatheads didn’t brew the drugs. The real cooks are inside. Bag ’em.”

“R-right! Move out! Show ’em the Amazoness spirit!”

“Roger!”

The clash was like herds of bulls smashing together; the infantry swung wide into the compound.

“H-hey! What do you think you’re doing?!”

“Big words for squatters. Not that I’m much better…”

Helpless alone, Tanlou could only watch.

“A-aaah!! Barbarians barging into Tanlou the Great’s lab—how savage!”

“Oh? Cooking illegal drugs is classy now?”

“Silence! This was my first step toward Lady Tistria! And you—you copied my drug, stole it!”

“Copied? You didn’t invent the formula. More important—okay just watching?”

Gaikaku and Tanlou were bystanders now.

Before them, humans and ogres hacked away—but the ogres were clearly winning.

“Fighting equal numbers sounded rough, but…”

“These guys aren’t that tough.”

“Strength’s equal, yet they move so stiff.”

The ogres’ dominance was almost puzzling.

The Tanlou Squad knew why.

“Damn… daaamn!”

“My muscles won’t bend!”

“We overdosed!”

Bigger muscles mean more power, but not necessarily more mobility.

Too much muscle is a meat straightjacket.

Ogres had the same issue, but bigger frames.

Even with equal muscle mass, a larger body keeps range of motion.

“They’d overpower weaker foes, but parity’s killing ’em.”

“N-no way… My drug was perfect! Why are they winning? Mine should be stronger—I’m the genius!”

“…You really are an apprentice brat.”

Tanlou’s ignorant outburst made Gaikaku sigh.

“Genius or fool, follow the recipe and the potion’s the same. That’s magecraft.”

“Th-that… but I’m a genius, so the same drug should work better—”

“You brewed it fine. You botched dosage and deployment.”

“Don’t lecture me! The material was bad—I used humans, you used ogres. That’s why I lost!”

“Fair. Still—your juiced men are losing.”

“So what?! That’s not my loss!”

“When the real Knight Order shows up, you still won’t win.”

“Wrong! Wrong! I’m not ordinary—I’m a genius mage! This result is wrong!”

“Amateurs obsess over pass or fail.”

For all his “genius,” Tanlou had no proof.

Pathetic.

“Let me guess—you found an ancient grimoire, copied the recipe, and now claim it as your skill?”

“C-c-c…”

“Apprentice boy—data’s coming in.”

The clash of weapons dwindled; snapping sounds rose.

“A-aaaah!”

“Gu-aaaah!”

The over-muscled men toppled. Their limbs had snapped mid-swing.

Muscle against muscle had broken their bones.

“This is drowning in power. Pump the muscles—bones can’t handle it. Plus the sketchy drugs probably weakened them further…”

“A-ah…”

“They’d break just the same against elite ogres.”

Tanlou thought his drug could beat the Knights; the test said no.

“So, apprentice—any plan to improve it, or is that it?”

“Sh-shut uuuup!!”

Unable to defend himself, he attacked Gaikaku instead.

“What about you?! You only won by using better stock! That proves I can serve Lady Tistria!”

“Oh?”

“You and I—what’s the difference! You can’t rebut me!”

“Couldn’t rebut me, and that hurts? Hihihihi.”

Unscathed, Tanlou crumbled mentally.

“Girls, you can take those off. They’re useless now, right?”

“Boss… yeah, the inner bones are broken already…”

“The latest batch lasted longer, though.”

“But it still crushes under that drug.”

Prompted, the ogre women peeled off their “armor.”

It looked like a furry muscle suit; beneath were sweaty, healthy ogres.

Zero sign of side effects.

They’d injected the Cultured Muscle-and-Bone Reinforcement Armor—Fresh Golems—not themselves. Only the disposable armor shattered.

Tanlou couldn’t fathom “wearable muscle.” He assumed a special serum.

“I-impossible?! Why are they healthy?! The side effects should hit!”

“My, my—can’t the genius figure it out?”

“O-oooaaah!”

Gaikaku laughed gleefully; Tanlou shrieked.

“The genius understands everything, right? Guess.”

“I know magecraft! Wh-what trickery is this?!”

The mage pissing contest ended.

The fighters looked around.

Healthy ogre women stood, while human men lay broken.

Same drug, opposite results.

“W-what’s going on…? Wasn’t this drug supposed to ruin the body?!”

“Seems so. The armor’s shredded, at least…”

“Don’t mess with me! Leather armor has nothing to do with the drug!”

The Tanlou Squad prided itself on paying the risk price.

Now their bodies quit before glory—and the identical foe was fine.

“We’re kinda dumb, so details escape us, but…”

The ogre women looked at Gaikaku, tense.

A fellow Illegal Mage, mocking Tanlou; he’d fought none, yet the spoils were his.

“Our boss is a genius, after all.”

Their survival was Gaikaku’s foresight.

Perhaps the fallen men were even more skilled—Gaikaku’s brilliance bridged any gap.

“Ah, finished? We captured the forced laborers and the profiteers!”

“Good work!”

The infantry who’d raided the interior returned.

Plump men bound; skinny men thanking them.

Seeing it, Tanlou realized everything he’d built was gone and fell silent.

“That’s everything, Commander.”

“No—still more.”

Gaikaku turned away, bored, leaving only cleanup.

“‘Everything’ isn’t finished yet.”

His job wasn’t done.

※

A few days after Gaikaku wiped out Tanlou’s faction.

Baron Arla Borealis awoke in bed.

“Oh, Baron-sama!”

“Grandpa? I, I… er…?”

The young baron, startled by the butler’s tears of joy, sat up.

…?!

He could sit up—astonishing.

Always frail, bedridden since his father fell.

Now his body moved freely; he was dumbfounded.

“M-my body…?!”

“Awake at last, Baron-sama?”

A shady-looking man entered; the baron tensed—then remembered.

“You’re… Gaikaku Hikume-dono, yes?”

“An honor to be remembered—gehihihihi…”

Gaikaku deliberately acted coarse and mysterious; the perceptive boy sensed he’d done something.

“Wh-what did you do to my body? No—what of the drug peddlers?”

“Tanlou and company are gone. Orders said they needn’t live. Shall I show you their heads later?”

“N-no… I barely knew their faces.”

He cleared his throat, doing his best to act the part of a baron.

“So, you avenged my father… my mother and our people. I thank you.”

“Hahaa…”

“Then my body—why does it feel so light?”

“Kuhi-hi-hi…”

Gaikaku laughed to unnerve the boy.

“My secret arts cured you, sir, using Tanlou’s own drugs—the analgesic and the muscle enhancer.”

“W-what?!”

“Beg pardon?!”

“I anesthetized you, fortified your frame… did some other work, too.”

Both baron and butler were stunned; the boy now looked merely slim—healthy.

He certainly didn’t look like a muscle monster.

“Banned drugs are banned for a reason—but created for a reason, too. Used correctly, they save lives.”

He chuckled mischievously.

“Medicine alone won’t finish the job, but with rehab you’ll be healthy enough to run outdoors.”

“R-really?! Truly?! You’re not lying?!”

“Indeed—if you work at it.”

The boy nearly bounced on the bed with joy; Gaikaku spoke to the tearful butler.

“Even used properly, the drug was illegal. I’d lose my head if word got out… keep this between us.”

“O-of course!”

Gaikaku stuck out his tongue playfully.

“Sorry it couldn’t end politely. Still… entrusting me with everything worked out, yeah?”

Illegal Mage Gaikaku Hikume.

Baron Arla Borealis praised his work and reported it to Tistria.

Thus… Gaikaku Hikume was officially appointed Knight Commander.