I Was Falsely Confessed to and Exposed in Front of Everyone, so I Jumped off the Roof - Chapter 12

I was washing my hands. I couldn’t get the feeling in my pinky to go away. I kept washing, over and over.

“You should stop.”

“But it bothers me.”

“You’re clean enough. Stop now.”

Kagiroi-san grabbed my hand and pulled it away from the water. I felt disgusted and shook her off. Then I went back to washing. I couldn’t stop thinking about the dirt she had just touched. Maybe germs got on me. And that would make me die. Die? After what I did, I’m worried about something like that?

“Do you think I’m dirty too?”

I couldn’t answer. I didn’t want Kagiroi-san to hate me.

“Then I’ll wash too.”

Kagiroi-san took some soap and washed her hands carefully. Then she touched my hand.

“Is this okay?”

Her hand was warm. The soft warmth felt nice. But it didn’t help. The feeling in my pinky still wouldn’t go away. I wanted to wash it off, but something stuck to my hand along with the awful memory. I was desperate to get it off.

♢ ♢ ♢

Ever since that stage, the way the other members look at me has been harsh. I’d be fine if it were just wary, like they were looking at something fragile, but feeling real hostility is annoying.

“Ruika-chan, how did you do that thing the other day?”

Sumire has been clinging to me like a little puppy lately. I don’t mind being admired, but I also don’t want to cause trouble.

“If you hang out with me, people will glare at you.”

“But I get bullied by seniors too, so it’s fine, right? Ahaha.”

I see. Then it’s okay. And thinking ahead, I need support members. But one girl alone isn’t enough yet.

“Do you want to upload a photo after practice for now?”

“Really? Yay!”

Sumire and I pose with our shoulders touching for a photo for SNS. I sent it to Manwa-san. She manages our idol SNS accounts because so many girls try to make it look like they’re dating someone. How pathetic. Most girls can’t control themselves. Not like me.

“Ruika-chan, why did you become an idol?”

“…Because I want everyone to know me.”

It’s not a lie. But really, it’s just a way to earn a chance to clear my name.

“I might be like you. I was a bullied kid, too. I’ve never had friends or a boyfriend because I’m so shy. But being alone is lonely. That’s why I want people to notice me.”

“I see. Then… we have to make it happen.”

“Yeah! I’ll do my best!”

She’s prettier than the other girls, and her singing and dancing are good too. She just hasn’t fully blossomed yet, but she’s talented. I can use her. So I’ll make her wish come true.

“Hey… don’t tell the others but—”

“Huh? What is it?”

“I’ve got a gravure job. It’s supposed to be just me, but… do you want to do it together?”

Manwa-san once told me that if I want to control people, I have to give them work. I used to be the same. A punishment game became my job. I fit into that role, and that’s how I ended up controlled and trapped in that outcome.

“Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Thank you, Ruika-chan!”

Sumire hugged me tightly. But my heart stayed cold. Still, if I want to rise here, I have to step on someone. An idol who reaches the top stands on a pile of others’ corpses. Even so, I’ll go. To accept my punishment and keep moving forward.

♢

The gravure shoot made me nervous. I’d always been just a background dancer, dancing at the edge. But seeing everyone preparing things just for me made my heart race. At the same time, it was fun. It felt good.

“Hi★ Everyone, thank you so much for today♡”

“Thank you!”

Together with Ruika-chan, I thanked everyone on set. Everyone was staring at her and was completely spaced out. Me too. I could feel myself getting drawn in. She was kind, but also wild enough to play with even the seniors like toys. Like a prince. That’s what I thought.

After changing into our swimsuits, we posed all over the house studio.

“Yes! Ruika-chan, great! Really amazing! But Sumire-chan… you’re a bit stiff.”

“I-I a-apologize…”

“Gravure isn’t just an easy job where you get photographed. You need to act properly too!”

“I’m sorry…”

I slumped as I was scolded. I guess I’m always on the side that can’t shine.

“Hey, can I try something? Nico♡”

“Ruika-chan, what is it?”

She spoke to the director.

“I’ll help Sumire-chan relax ♥ Just wait a moment★”

“Oh? Alright. If Ruika-chan says so.”

“Leave it to me★”

Then Ruika-chan grabbed my hand and pulled me somewhere no one could see. She pressed me against the wall and glared at me.

“Can you stop wasting time being nervous?”

“I-I’m s-sorry. It’s just my first time.”

“It’s my first time too. But it doesn’t matter. You’re nervous because you’re paying too much attention to yourself.”

“Even if you say that…”

What she’s saying doesn’t make sense. I can’t just stop being nervous like that. For a moment, Ruika-chan looks like the mean people I know.

“Really? Then I’ll take your attention off yourself.”

“How do you do that?!”

Suddenly, Ruika-chan kissed me. And not just that, she put her tongue in my mouth. She touched my body too. My mind couldn’t keep up with what was happening. But it felt really good. When she pulled away, I wanted her to keep going. It was my first kiss. Now I understand why everyone wants it. A small trail of saliva connected our mouths. Ruika-chan wiped it away with the back of her hand.

“Why did you do that? Something like this?”

“Were you full with just me?”

“Huh? Y-Yeah… Ruika-chan is so much…”

“Then it’s fine. Just think about me. When we go back, think only about me.”

“…Yeah. I can’t think about anyone else now but you.”

Then we went back to the shoot and started the gravure again. I only thought about Ruika-chan. No, I could only think about her.

“Ah, so soft! Amazing! Such magic! This is incredible!”

The director was excited. I was just thinking about Ruika-chan, but my body moved freely. We hugged, pressed close together, and posed. I wanted everything photographed. Everything inside me is Ruika-chan, too.

♢ ♢ ♢

These days, nobody really buys manga magazines, right? People read series on apps, or just download them from Amazon. So it was just bad luck that I happened to see that magazine at a convenience store. Ruika-chan and Sumire-chan… I didn’t know them back then. But there they were, on the cover. The moment I saw that photo… hehe. Well, I guess you can imagine. I bought it on the spot and looked at the gravure at home. Something I’d never done before.

Even with AV, in this age, we can watch uncensored videos for free on sharing sites. But seeing these beautiful girls in a magazine, it was somehow even more… exciting. Haha.

Even though the photos were just of the two girls goofing around, I saw it as them having dirty sex. And it wasn’t just that. Ruika-chan’s strong gaze and Sumire-chan’s weak, almost wanting look… It was like a threesome. I went crazy, jerking off like mad. Hehe. After finishing, I wiped my hand lightly and immediately thought I had to go back to the convenience store and buy every copy of the magazine I could.

But when I went back, the magazine was already sold out. And that wasn’t all, my brothers were there too. We understood each other just with our eyes. Wishing each other luck, I immediately bought the magazine online, downloaded it, and made my own copies. For keeping, for use, and for brotherly purposes.

I’m mentally not a virgin, you could say. Ruika-chan and Sumire-chan may look pure, but their minds are dirty. They were mentally not virgins, too. And that’s what makes it so good. Phew. Well, I’m getting horny again, so I’ll excuse myself here.