I Risked My Life To Save The Cheeky Girl, And As A Result, I Lost My Right Arm.

Being clumsy isn’t so bad after all! (Part 1)

Hasegawa is always by my side.

Not once has she returned to her own home. Day after day, she stays with me, tirelessly. Whenever I face a problem, she swiftly reaches out to help me.

Her dedication is incredible, but at the same time, it’s a little frightening.

Ever since my accident, Hasegawa hasn’t smiled. It’s almost hard to believe she’s the same person she was before.

Her brows are always furrowed with worry, and her lips pressed tightly together.

I understand her feelings; given the situation, it’s not exactly easy to smile. Being at my house with my parents around only makes it harder for her.

But seeing her so weighed down by all this is painful for me too. The stark contrast to the Hasegawa I used to know only makes her sadness that much more palpable.

It’s ironic, really. Back then, she used to tease me with a laugh, and I’d get annoyed, yelling, “You little…!” But now, all I want is to see her smile again.

(Will Hasegawa ever smile again…?)

As the days go by, that thought has begun to grow steadily within me.

It happened one night.

After coming home from school, we’d have dinner, take care of our nightly routines, then head to my room, change into pajamas, and go to sleep. This was our usual cycle.

That day was no different. Once I finished my routine, I went to my room with Hasegawa.

“I’ll turn off the lights now,” she said.

“Ah, thanks. Good night, Hasegawa.”

“Good night, Senpai,” she replied.

With that, she turned off the lights, and we lay down together on the bed to sleep.

I always slept facing the wall, while Hasegawa would sleep back-to-back with me.

Living with just one arm was more exhausting than I ever imagined. The strain on my left arm, which now had to take over so much, was far greater than when I had both arms. Since it’s not my dominant hand, the lack of muscle only added to the burden. By the end of the day, my arm would be screaming in pain.

Normally, as soon as I got into bed, my body, utterly drained, would collapse into sleep almost instantly. There were even times when I’d wake up the moment my head hit the pillow, only to realize it was already morning.

“………………”

But tonight, for some reason, I just couldn’t fall asleep. As my eyes adjusted to the darkness, the white wall in front of me became clearer and clearer.

(This is frustrating… I want to fall asleep already.)

I closed my eyes and tried to force myself into slumber, but it didn’t work. Even after counting 100 sheep, I let out a quiet sigh in defeat.

Rustle, rustle.

I suddenly heard movement from beside me.

Turning my head cautiously, I saw Hasegawa sitting up in bed, hugging her knees.

She let out a small sigh, just like I had a moment earlier.

“Hasegawa…? What’s wrong? Can’t sleep?”

When I called out to her, she turned to face me and answered softly, “I’m sorry.”

“Did I wake you up, Senpai?”

“No, not really. I couldn’t sleep either, so I was already awake.”

“Is that so? I guess I’m not the only one having trouble sleeping tonight.”

I sat up in bed, propping myself up with one knee bent.

“Haah… What’s up with us? Both wide awake like this?”

“Yeah, really.”

“………………”

It was a peculiar moment. The two of us sitting silently in the dark, aimlessly staring into the void.

Shhh.

I reached over and pulled the curtain aside, glancing out the window. The night sky was pitch-black, with a lone white full moon hanging in the center.

It looked like someone had cut a perfect circle into a sheet of black paper and pasted the moon there.

“Senpai.”

Hearing her voice, I turned toward Hasegawa. Her face, illuminated by the moonlight, seemed delicate and almost ethereal.

“I’m thinking of going to the kitchen to grab a glass of water. Would you like one too, Senpai?”

“Oh? Water? Yeah, I’d appreciate that.”

“Alright, I’ll bring it right away.”

With that, Hasegawa got up and left the room, heading toward the kitchen.

A short while later, she returned, holding two glasses of water.

“Here you go, Senpai.”

“Thanks.”

I took one of the glasses from her and drank it all in one go.

“…Ahh.”

The sensation of cold water sliding down my throat was incredibly refreshing. It felt as though my body was rejuvenated.

“………………”

Hasegawa, on the other hand, sipped her water slowly, taking small, deliberate gulps.

“…Thanks for everything, Hasegawa.”

The words escaped my mouth before I even realized it. She turned to face me, a puzzled expression on her face.

“What’s the matter, Senpai?” she asked.

“Why are you thanking me, Senpai?”

“Well, it’s because you’re always doing so much for me, Hasegawa. I really appreciate it.”

“You don’t have to say that… What’s with the sudden formality?”

“I just felt like I needed to properly say thank you. It’s important, you know?”

“………………”

“But… how should I put it? You should relax a little, you know? Don’t worry about me so much—take care of yourself too.”

“…I can’t do that. I’m here because I’ve chosen to shoulder this burden.”

“………………”

“When you saved my life, Senpai, you sacrificed your arm. I can’t feel at peace unless I repay you by taking care of you in every way I can.”

Saying this, Hasegawa finally finished drinking her glass of water.

“I’ll take the glasses.”

She picked up both her glass and mine, then left the room, heading toward the kitchen.

“………………”

To be honest, I understand how she feels. When guilt weighs heavily on you, it’s hard to relax. Feeling happy or enjoying yourself in such moments only makes you feel more guilty. I get that all too well.

But even so, I want Hasegawa to ease up a little… to let herself breathe. It’s painful to watch her like this.

With each passing day, it feels like her emotions are becoming more subdued, as though her heart is wearing thin.

The truth is, I already feel more than enough sincerity from her. I don’t need her to take care of me every waking moment. I just want her to find freedom, to let herself go.

But I know if I suggested that now, she’d just shake her head. This is something she won’t let go of until she comes to terms with it herself.

So at the very least, I hope she finds moments of peace while taking care of me. And if possible, moments where she can smile again.

“…Alright.”

I began formulating a plan in my mind. When Hasegawa comes back, I’ll invite her to join me.

***

I was rinsing two glasses in the kitchen.

Shhhhhh

The water from the faucet splashed onto my skin as I rinsed the glasses.

“Thanks for everything, Hasegawa.”

“………………”

“You’ve been helping me so much. I really appreciate it.”

“But… how should I put it? You should relax a little, you know? Don’t worry about me so much—take care of yourself too.”

Senpai is really kind.

He’s always looking out for me, even though he doesn’t have to.

To be honest, I’m really tired. I don’t have time to relax, and I barely have the chance to do anything I enjoy.

But I know that’s how it should be. Sacrificing those things is part of what it means to take care of him.

After all, the reason this accident happened is because I relied on Senpai’s kindness too much. If I’m ever going to avoid making the same mistake, I need to stop depending on him so much…

“…Alright.”

Having finished washing the glasses, I carefully dried them and returned them to the cabinet.

Then, I headed back to Senpai’s room.

“Sorry for taking so long.”

As I opened the door, Senpai greeted me with a warm, “Oh, thanks for that.”

“Hey, Hasegawa.”

In the dim light of the room, Senpai looked at me and made a sudden proposal.

“This might be out of the blue, but… how about going to the shopping mall on our day off?”

“Huh? The shopping mall?”

“Yeah, I just remembered there’s something I need to buy. It’s a bit of a trip, but would you be okay with it?”

“…Of course. If you’re going, I’ll go with you.”

“Great, let’s do that.”

“………………”

Senpai’s face softened into a genuine, happy smile. It was an expression that felt strangely different from usual, as though he was relieved or even a bit excited.

***

It was Saturday, March 15th. After about 30 minutes on the bus, we arrived at the shopping mall.

Since it was a day off, the place was bustling with a lot of people.

Families with small children, an elderly couple looking calm and content, groups of younger people than us, and couples holding hands, looking happy…

“Alright, we’ve made it,” Senpai said.

“Senpai, what exactly do you want to buy?”

“Oh, just some stationery. Let’s head to the 100 yen shop first,” he replied.

“Okay.”

So, we made our way to the 100 yen shop inside the mall. There, Senpai picked up an eraser and some mechanical pencil refills.

“Alright, that’s everything I needed. Now, what do you say, Hasegawa? Since we’re at the mall, how about we wander around a bit?”

“Huh? Don’t you have anything else you want to buy?”

“Nope, I’m done with my shopping. How about you just take a look around freely?”

“…I’m fine with that.”

Senpai squinted his eyes and started looking around curiously.

“Hey, hey, Hasegawa. How about that store over there?”

Senpai pointed to a clothing store for girls.

“Senpai, that’s a store for girls. If you want clothes, I think another store would be better,” I replied.

“Hahaha, I know that much! It’s not for me, it’s for you! Don’t you want to look?” he grinned.

“Huh? M-me?” I stuttered, surprised.

“Yeah, yeah! We’re here, so why not? What do you think?” he urged.

“………………”

At this point, I realized Senpai’s intentions. Honestly, he was being way too obvious about it.

This outing was meant for me.

I hadn’t realized it until we arrived, but once I saw Senpai only buy stationery, I started to get suspicious. Why would he come all the way here just for a pack of pens? There’s no need to buy that at a 100 yen shop at the mall. Sure, there isn’t one near my house, but there’s no reason to come all the way here for something like that. There must be a closer shop.

“…Senpai, did you actually come here for me from the start?” I asked, almost certain, but wanting to see how he would react.

Senpai panicked and quickly denied it, “N-no way! Not at all!”

“I told you before, right? I just happened to need something, and while I was here, I thought I’d take a little look around, that’s all! Really, I swear!”

And then he scratched behind his left ear.

“………………”

“Anyway, let’s go check out that clothing store!” he said, trying to change the subject.

“…Okay.”

So, I followed Senpai to the store.