Paramour gets his a** digged (Zamaa)

――――【Maximilian’s POV】

This is nothing short of hell!

I was being forced to guard the borders, wearing a cursed collar slapped on me by some bastard claiming to be my uncle. The damn thing would send an unbearable electric shock through me if I dared to disobey.

“They expect me to single-handedly fend off the monsters invading from the Magus territory? How much more of a nightmare can this get?”

Screeeeeech!

A goblin, a lowly monster, burst out from the shadows, raising its club and audaciously aiming to strike me, the great Maximilian.

“This little runt’s no match for me!”

I quickly drew my sword to slice it apart…

“Huh?”

A sharp pain shot through my wrist. My sword, which was supposed to slide out effortlessly, got stuck in its sheath.

Thud!

The goblin’s club landed squarely on my head.

“Ha! That was close! Good thing I snagged this helmet from a passing merchant! You think you can beat me, you pathetic excuse for a monster?”

I boasted, but my head started spinning like it was trapped in a washing machine. I needed to take this thing out fast and find somewhere to rest…

Screech! Screech!

Just as I finally managed to unsheath my sword, more goblins emerged from the bushes, screeching and hopping around like a bunch of annoying pests.

At times like this, I wished I had subordinates…

“Damn it! My so-called lackeys died off too easily when I used them as shields. Useless idiots…”

――――Thirty minutes later…

“Gigi-gigigi(What do we do with this guy?)”

“Gigigigi (Finish him off?)“

“Gii-gii-gii(Leave him. He’s trash. Not worth it.)”

When I came to, I found myself stripped down to my underwear, lying on the ground.

“Hmph, they must have fled in fear after witnessing my true power.”

Damn it, they beat me to a pulp and then just left me like this!

Next time I see those worthless goblins, I’ll turn them into diced meat!

Wasn’t I supposed to live it up in this world after getting reincarnated? This has got to be some kind of scam.

I was so fed up that I just wanted to lie face down in the dirt forever.

At some point, I must have lost consciousness again. I felt something soft tapping on my head.

No doubt about it!

This must be a beautiful woman trying to wake up the handsome me…

She must be a beautiful nobel lady who fell for me at first sight.

I’d marry her, and we’d live in blissful luxury…

Anticipating the start of my harem life, I opened my eyes.

But my expectations were wrong.

What touched my head was not a beautiful woman but a slime-dripping plant monster, a Mad Plant. Its many tentacles were creeping all over my body. Before I could react, the tentacles quickly wrapped around my wrists and ankles.

“H-Hey! S-Stop! I’m not into that kind of thing! That’s not where things are supposed to go!”

My arms were stretched out like I was on a cross, and my legs were forced into an M shape. Just when I thought I couldn’t get any more humiliated, a spiky tentacle grazed my inner thigh…

“Hiiiiiieeeeeeeeeee!!!”

A slimy, disgusting green tentacle slithered its way into my gut!

“That’s not what I meant by “you can f*ck as much as you want” when I said that!!”

――――【Brad’s Perspective】

According to the game’s timeline, Maximilian should be arriving in the capital around now…

Maximilian, despite being mistreated after his uncle stole his inheritance, eventually accumulates power and rises to the rank of Knight Commander through his unwavering determination and integrity…

When Freesia, devastated by my annulment of our engagement, tries to throw herself into the river, it’s Maximilian who meets her at the foot of the bridge.

The two, drawn together by their unfortunate circumstances, form a strong bond.

That’s how Maximilian’s route begins, and when he and Freesia are together, my death flags pop up more frequently, making him someone to keep an eye on. To avoid being hated, maybe I should just use my royal authority to promote him to a position above Knight Commander…

――――A Few Months Later.

This is strange…

By now, the event where he meets Freesia should have been triggered.

Becoming An Eroge Herione

――――A Few Months Later.

This is strange…

By now, the event where Freesia meets Maximilian should have happened.

“Brad-sama! What are you doing here all alone?”

“Don’t cling to me like that! We’re in a crowded place!”

While out incognito in the capital, I was quickly spotted by Freesia. She pressed her now large bre**ts against my arm and clung to me,  larger than her in-game counterpart.

Just as I was about to firmly tell her to let go, she looked up at me with those wide, innocent eyes, leaving even someone as sharp-tongued as me at a loss for words.

She’s really too cute…

I could have easily outrun Freesia, but that would mean losing sight of Maximilian.

“We finally got a chance to go on a date incognito…”

Yikes!

Mīnya, usually so relaxed, suddenly glared at me with a fierce “hiss,” raising her claws in a threatening manner.

“Fine, fine! I’ll allow it, just this once.”

“Thank you! It’s a joy to be able to hold Brad-sama’s arm like this.”

Brad, you’re so full of yourself!

Yet, Freesia’s smile was so radiant that I couldn’t help but think she was truly a good person. Even though I couldn’t entirely shake the feeling that her affection might be an act, being able to walk arm in arm with someone as beautiful as Freesia was a dream come true… if only it weren’t for those pesky death flags.

Mīnya stared at me for a moment before retreating into the pouch slung over Freesia’s shoulder. Did that mean I was forgiven?

“Ugh!”

“Ouch!”

“What in the world…?”

“T-This is bad…”

People walking towards us groaned as they passed, all of them shifting uncomfortably before quickly disappearing to the sides of the street.

“Is something wrong with everyone?” Freesia asked, her voice full of innocent concern.

The insensitivity is terrifying…

The strap of Freesia’s pouch was perfectly positioned across her chest, creating a suggestive “pai-sura” effect that was undeniably erotic. Despite having her mouth veiled like an Arabian noblewoman and her hair hidden under a hood, Freesia’s appearance was still highly provocative.

At this rate, she’s more like an eroge heroine than the intended otome game protagonist…

(TL: it’s like a strap right through the middle)

“By the way, Freesia, I have a question for you.”

“Yes, what is it? Are you asking how many times I mast*rbated last night while thinking of Brad-sama?”

What?!

“That is not what I was asking!!!”

“Oh, I see… about five times. It was quite pleasurable…”

I didn’t hear anything…I didn’t hear anything….

“Enough about that. What I really want to know is if you’re familiar with a man named Maximilian Megas?”

“No, not at all… Even if I did, my eyes are only for Brad-sama.”

I wasn’t entirely sure if I could trust everything Freesia said, but she didn’t seem to be lying.

Huh?

Just when I felt a bit of relief, I noticed someone following us.

At that moment, Freesia’s stomach growled. She looked embarrassed, so I decided to take her to a restaurant in the capital, using the opportunity to scout out our surroundings as well.

“This way.”

“Brad-sama…?”

Without hesitation, I spun on my heel, determined to catch a glimpse of our pursuer’s face. The moment I changed direction, the tailing figure realized I had caught on and quickly ducked behind cover. But there was no way they could outmaneuver me—I was faster, and their identity was as good as revealed.

What a troublesome fool…

Freesia, oblivious to the situation, seemed more surprised by the fact that I was holding her hand.

“We can’t have your stomach growling during a secret outing,” I said, pointing to a sign ahead that depicted bread and a meat dish.

“Yes!”

Freesia seemed to understand. She flashed a radiant smile, the kind that could charm even a demon.